John August

Words on the page

Scriptnotes Holiday Show 2015

Episode - 228

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Film Industry, QandA, Scriptnotes, Television, Transcribed, Words on the page, Writing Process

John and Craig welcome special guests Malcolm Spellman, Natasha Leggero, Riki Lindhome and Alan Yang to the third annual Scriptnotes Holiday show, recorded live on December 9th, 2015 in Hollywood.

Malcolm Spellman is a producer on EMPIRE, and one of our most popular Scriptnotes guests ever. He also set a new record for swearing.

Riki Lindhome and Natasha Leggero are the co-creators and stars of ANOTHER PERIOD on Comedy Central. We discuss pitching their show off a presentation video, and the challenge of producing a show with a huge cast of very busy comedy stars.

Alan Yang is the co-creator (with Aziz Ansari) of MASTER OF NONE on Netflix. We discuss how the show came to be, and the challenge of being “the (blank) guy” on a writing staff.

Huge thanks to our amazing audience, and the Writers Guild Foundation for organizing the event.

Our next live show is January 25, with special guests Lawrence Kasdan (screenwriter of RAIDERS OF THE LOST ARK and STAR WARS: THE FORCE AWAKENS) and actor-writer-director Jason Bateman. The night is a benefit for Hollywood Heart. (Link below.)

Links:

* Malcolm Spellman on [IMDb](http://www.imdb.com/name/nm1173259/) and [Twitter](https://twitter.com/malcolmspellman), and [Scriptnotes, 185](http://johnaugust.com/2015/malcolm-spellman-a-study-in-heat)
* [Natasha Leggero](http://www.natashaleggero.com/) on [IMDb](http://www.imdb.com/name/nm1641089/) and [Twitter](https://twitter.com/natashaleggero)
* [Riki Lindhome](http://www.rikilindhome.com/) on [IMDb](http://www.imdb.com/name/nm1641251/) and [Twitter](https://twitter.com/rikilindhome)
* [Another Period](http://www.cc.com/shows/another-period) on Comedy Central
* Alan Yang on [IMDb](http://www.imdb.com/name/nm1520649/) and [Twitter](https://twitter.com/AlanMYang)
* [Master of None](http://www.netflix.com/title/80049714) on Netflix
* [Harvard Lampoon](http://harvardlampoon.com/), and [on Wikipedia](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Harvard_Lampoon)
* [KRUPS F23070 Egg Cooker](http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00005KIRS/?tag=johnaugustcom-20)
* [Postmates](https://postmates.com/) will deliver you stuff
* [AlanMYang on Instagram](https://www.instagram.com/alanmyang/)
* [Kitchen Hacks: How Clever Cooks Get Things Done](http://www.amazon.com/dp/1940352002/?tag=johnaugustcom-20)
* [Cook’s Illustrated](https://www.cooksillustrated.com/)
* Hamilton, the Original Broadway Cast Recording on [iTunes](https://itunes.apple.com/us/album/hamilton-original-broadway/id1025210938) and on [Amazon](http://www.amazon.com/dp/B013JLBPGE/?tag=johnaugustcom-20)
* [Scriptnotes, Bonus: Straight Outta Compton](http://scriptnotes.net/bonus-straight-outta-compton)
* [Get your tickets now for Scriptnotes, Live on January 25](http://hollywoodheart.org/upcoming/) with [Jason Bateman](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jason_Bateman) and [Lawrence Kasdan](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lawrence_Kasdan), a benefit for [Hollywood HEART](http://hollywoodheart.org)
* [Scriptnotes, 73: Raiders of the Lost Ark](http://johnaugust.com/2013/raiders-of-the-lost-ark)
* [Email us](mailto:ask@johnaugust.com) or tweet [John](https://twitter.com/johnaugust) or [Craig](https://twitter.com/clmazin) for advice on things that have nothing to do with screenwriting
* Thanks to the [Writers Guild Foundation](https://www.wgfoundation.org/) and the [Los Angeles Film School](http://www.lafilm.edu/) for hosting us
* [Intro/Outro](http://johnaugust.com/2013/scriptnotes-the-outros) by Matthew Chilelli ([send us yours!](http://johnaugust.com/2014/outros-needed))

You can download the episode here: [AAC](http://traffic.libsyn.com/scriptnotes/scriptnotes_ep_228.m4a) | [mp3](http://traffic.libsyn.com/scriptnotes/scriptnotes_ep_228.mp3).

**UPDATE 12-18-15:** The transcript of this episode can be found [here](http://johnaugust.com/2015/scriptnotes-ep-228-scriptnotes-holiday-show-2015-transcript).

Whiplash, on paper and on screen

Directors, Follow Up, Formatting, Scriptnotes, Transcribed, Words on the page

John and Craig take an in-depth look at two scenes in Damien Chazelle’s WHIPLASH to see how conflicts were structured — and what changed from script to shooting.

In follow-up, we discuss the myth vs. reality of Zola, and what we mean by a character having agency.

We’re having a live holiday show in Los Angeles! It’s December 9th in Hollywood, with special guests Riki Lindhome, Natasha Leggero and Malcolm Spellman. Tickets will sell out, so be sure to click the links below.

Links:

* [Buy your tickets now for the 2015 Scriptnotes Holiday Show on December 9th](https://www.wgfoundation.org/screenwriting-events/scriptnotes-holiday-live-show-with-john-august-and-craig-mazin) with guests [Riki Lindhome, Natasha Leggero](http://www.cc.com/shows/another-period) and [Malcolm Spellman](http://johnaugust.com/2015/malcolm-spellman-a-study-in-heat)
* [The true story behind ‘Zola,’ the epic Twitter story too crazy to be real](https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/the-intersect/wp/2015/11/02/the-true-story-behind-zola-the-epic-twitter-story-too-crazy-to-be-real/)
* [Whiplash](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Whiplash_(2014_film)) on Wikipedia
* [Whiplash, family dinner scene](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RSDmo-gJ8XY&feature=youtu.be), and [the PDF](http://johnaugust.com/Assets/WhiplashDinner.pdf)
* [Whiplash, jazz club scene, Script vs Screen](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kunUvYIJtHM&feature=youtu.be), and [the PDF](http://johnaugust.com/Assets/WhiplashClub.pdf)
* [Sunnybrook doctor first to perform blood-brain barrier procedure using focused ultrasound waves](http://www.theglobeandmail.com/life/health-and-fitness/health/sunnybrook-doctor-first-to-perform-blood-brain-barrier-procedure-using-focused-ultrasound-waves/article27171384/)
* [what3words](http://what3words.com/)
* [Outro](http://johnaugust.com/2013/scriptnotes-the-outros) by Kim Atle ([send us yours!](http://johnaugust.com/2014/outros-needed))

You can download the episode here: [AAC](http://traffic.libsyn.com/scriptnotes/scriptnotes_ep_224.m4a) | [mp3](http://traffic.libsyn.com/scriptnotes/scriptnotes_ep_224.mp3).

**UPDATE 11-20-15:** The transcript of this episode can be found [here](http://johnaugust.com/2015/scriptnotes-ep-224-whiplash-on-paper-and-on-screen-transcript).

The One Where Aline’s Show Debuts

Film Industry, Follow Up, Scriptnotes, Television, Three Page Challenge, Transcribed, Words on the page, Writing Process

Aline Brosh McKenna joins us to talk through the launch of Crazy Ex-Girlfriend, and what she’s learned since she introduced us to the show nearly a year ago. Brian Lowry of Variety raves that it is “one of the fall’s most promising hours.” We’re not surprised at all.

Then it’s a look at three pages from writer-director Scott Frank’s THE LOOKOUT, examining how a two-character dialogue scene works both on paper and on the screen.

Also this week: Indian screenwriters go on strike, Craig goes to Canters, and a French train hero gets stabbed in the second act.

If you got your new Scriptnotes shirt, show the world with the hashtag #scriptnotes or #scripnotesT.

Links:

* [Austin Film Festival 2015 panel schedule](https://austinfilmfestival.com/festivalandconference/conference/2015-panels/)
* [Train hero Spencer Stone stabbed](http://www.sacbee.com/news/local/crime/article38180571.html), and [Scriptnotes, 214](http://johnaugust.com/2015/clerks-and-recreation)
* [Canter’s](https://www.cantersdeli.com/home)
* [Aline Brosh McKenna](http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0112459/) on episodes [60](http://johnaugust.com/2012/the-black-list-and-a-stack-of-scenes), [76](http://johnaugust.com/2013/how-screenwriters-find-their-voice), [100](http://johnaugust.com/2013/scriptnotes-the-100th-episode), [101](http://johnaugust.com/2013/101-qa-from-the-live-show), [119](http://johnaugust.com/2013/positive-moviegoing), [123](http://johnaugust.com/2013/scriptnotes-holiday-spectacular), [124](http://johnaugust.com/2013/qa-from-the-holiday-spectacular) [152](http://johnaugust.com/2014/the-rocky-shoals-pages-70-90), [161](http://johnaugust.com/2014/a-cheap-cut-of-meat-soaked-in-butter), [175](http://johnaugust.com/2014/twelve-days-of-scriptnotes), [180](http://johnaugust.com/2015/bad-teachers-good-advice-and-the-default-male) and [200](http://johnaugust.com/2015/the-200th-episode-live-show)
* The New York Times on [The Great American Musical, Side B, in ‘Crazy Ex-Girlfriend’](http://www.nytimes.com/2015/10/11/arts/television/the-great-american-musical-side-b-in-my-crazy-ex-girlfriend.html?_r=0)
* Rachel Bloom and Jack Dolgen (and Aline) on [Scriptnotes, 175](http://johnaugust.com/2014/twelve-days-of-scriptnotes)
* [Bola Ogun](https://pro-labs.imdb.com/name/nm4459589/?ref_=sch_int), and the full cast and crew of [Crazy Ex-Girlfriend](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt4094300/fullcredits?ref_=tt_ov_st_sm) on IMDb
* [Bollywood to go on indefinite strike from October 3](http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/entertainment/hindi/bollywood/news/Bollywood-to-go-on-indefinite-strike-from-October-3/articleshow/49183357.cms) from The Times of India
* Scott Frank on [Wikipedia](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scott_Frank) and [IMDb](http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0291082/)
* The Artful Writer on [Scene Harmony](https://web.archive.org/web/20120323053754/http://artfulwriter.com/?p=216)
* Three Pages by [Scott Frank](http://johnaugust.com/Assets/luvlee.pdf), and [the scene from The Lookout](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_nmYaR_ZllQ)
* [Use gift cards from other countries to make purchases in foreign iTunes stores](http://www.elftronix.com/easy-method-make-us-itunes-purchase-from-any-country/)
* [Games Magazine](http://gamesmagazine-online.com/)
* [Outro](http://johnaugust.com/2013/scriptnotes-the-outros) by Rajesh Naroth ([send us yours!](http://johnaugust.com/2014/outros-needed))

You can download the episode here: [AAC](http://traffic.libsyn.com/scriptnotes/scriptnotes_ep_219.m4a) | [mp3](http://traffic.libsyn.com/scriptnotes/scriptnotes_ep_219.mp3).

**UPDATE 10-16-15:** The transcript of this episode can be found [here](http://johnaugust.com/2015/scriptnotes-ep-219-the-one-where-alines-show-debuts-transcript).

Short cut-aways, and the value of BACK TO:

Formatting, Words on the page

The script I’m writing has a character who is reconstructing past events. In several scenes, we cut away to these memories, always returning to the current scene.

There are several ways to do this on the page.

The first technique is to simply use full scene headers. (This example is made up just for this blog post.)

Roger squints in the glare of light.

CUT TO:

INT. EXAMINATION ROOM – NIGHT [FLASHBACK]

ORDERLIES strap Roger’s forehead to the table. A DRILL WHIRRS as a BRIGHT LIGHT swings overhead.

BACK TO:

INT. COPY ROOM – DAY

Roger squats down, suddenly reeling.

That BACK TO: is your friend. It’s a reminder to the reader that you were in the middle of another scene, and it’s still happening. Yes, you could just use CUT TO. But it’s ambiguous. Are you still in the same scene, or is this a different place/time?

BACK TO: is also a huge help if the cutaway involves multiple locations — the finale of Big Fish, for example. It’s a signal to the reader that all of the cutting is done.

### Doing less

If you’re cutting away to the same thing often, using the full scene header gets annoying. It’s like that guy at a party who keeps introducing himself.

We know who you are, Dave. You can stop.

In the example above, if we’ve been to that examination room scene before, I’m more likely to write it like this:

As Roger squints in the glare of light --

ORDERLIES strap Roger’s forehead to the table. A DRILL WHIRRS as a BRIGHT LIGHT swings overhead.

BACK TO SCENE.

Roger squats down, suddenly reeling.

Removing the location and the transitions feels like cheating, but it better reflects my intention with the scene. This cutaway is meant to be a nibble, not a meal.

Setting it off with italics isn’t required, but it signals the reader to pay attention — we’re doing something special here. Bold or underline would also work. (If you use special formatting for flashbacks like this, don’t use it for any other narrative device.)

That BACK TO SCENE is also optional, but here I like it as a tiny speed bump to make sure the reader understands that we’re out of flashback mode.

Is it weird to have BACK TO SCENE without a CUT TO? Kind of. You could use a CUT TO: and even skip the italics. But it’s extra lines, and I don’t think the reader is likely to get lost.

### In production

When it comes time to make the movie, everything needs a scene number. We generally think of scene numbers going with scene headers, but the reality is that anything can have a number attached, including the italicized action lines above.

There are different philosophies for how to number flashback scenes, but my preference would be to keep the copy room scene as a single scene number (e.g. 34) and group together all of the examination room scenes as a sequence (e.g. A900, B900, C900). This way, the copy room scene doesn’t get divided across a few strips, potentially confusing everyone.

Numbering scenes is a conversation to have with the director, A.D. and line producer. It’s a luxury problem, because it means your movie is getting made.