James Harbeck analyzes some of the common annoying sounds in [teenage speech](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZY2R_K3NFPo&feature=player_embedded).
What’s interesting to me is how difficult many of them are to write in dialogue. I often find myself placing them in scene description or another character’s parenthetical.
MARY
You’ll get another 4S. You don’t need a 5.
(off Caleb’s whiny gasp)
Yeah -- next time, don’t try to Snapchat your junk in a hot tub.
Directors, Film Industry, Los Angeles, Scriptnotes, Transcribed, Words on the page
How you get from one scene to the next can be just as important as the scenes themselves. Craig and John talk techniques and tactics for making those cuts count.
But first there’s the issue of the $23 million lawsuit filed by two of the GI Joe writers, claiming that much of the storyline in the 2013 sequel came from their earlier work. Is this the case John and Craig have long predicted, in which unpaid pre-writing comes back to haunt the studios?
We also look at a bunch of shots we no longer need to see in movies.
Plus Craig and John have actual news, with a date for the long-promised live 100th episode in Los Angeles, and a bonus live podcast in June.
LINKS:
* [Turning the Page: Storytelling in the Digital Age](http://www.oscars.org/events-exhibitions/events/2013/05/turning-page.html) at the Samuel Goldwyn Theater
* [The Inebriati](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lIv96reVlAE) from That Mitchell and Webb Look
* [Paramount & MGM Sued By ‘G.I. Joe’ Writers](http://www.deadline.com/2013/05/paramount-mgm-sued-by-g-i-joe-writers-for-23m/) and [the complaint](http://www-deadline-com.vimg.net/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/G.-I.-Joe-Complaint__130506233913.pdf) from Deadline
* [Twenty Shots to Be Henceforth Retired from Film Vocabulary](http://www.reverseshot.com/article/20_shots_be_henceforth_retired_film_vocabulary) on Reverse Shot
* The Los Angeles Times on [Studios donating film set materials to Habitat for Humanity](http://articles.latimes.com/2013/may/08/business/la-fi-ct-onlocation-habitat-20130508)
* Joe Nienalt and Daniel Vang’s [will-read-your-script fundraiser](http://heartwalk.kintera.org/faf/donorReg/donorPledge.asp?ievent=1044247&supid=227801200) for the American Heart Association
* Listen to [Scandal Revealed episode 221](https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/scandal-revealed/id566120824) featuring Matt Byrne
* Chad & Dara Creasey are on [Mistresses](http://beta.abc.go.com/shows/mistresses) on ABC
* [The Hollywood Reporter Comedy Class of 2013](http://www.hollywoodreporter.com/lists/john-hamburg-dana-fox-449162)’s writeup on Dana Fox (and John Hamburg)
* Rawson Thurber’s [We’re the Millers](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/We’re_the_Millers) on Wikipedia
* New dad [Sean Smith](http://www.imdb.com/name/nm1091301/) on IMDb
* [Email us](http://johnaugust.com/ask-a-question) or Tweet [John](https://twitter.com/johnaugust) and [Craig](https://twitter.com/clmazin) your questions on anything
* OUTRO: Cyndi Lauper’s [Girls Just Want to Have Fun covered by Busby Marou](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nJeYmzDTGqE)
You can download the episode here: [AAC](http://traffic.libsyn.com/scriptnotes/scriptnotes_ep_89.m4a).
**UPDATE** 5-16-13: The transcript of this episode can be found [here](http://johnaugust.com/2013/scriptnotes-ep-89-writing-effective-transitions-transcript).
For screenwriters, John McWhorter’s TEDTalk on texting grammar is a useful reminder of the differences between how people talk and how they write.
Speech is made up of word clusters with no discrete punctuation. Because speech is almost always dialogue — you’re usually speaking *with* somebody — it’s structured in a way that allows interruption.
Compare that to written language, which is by its nature a unbroken monologue with punctuation to demarcate how thoughts should fit together, allowing complex sentences like this one with nested clauses (and even parenthetical asides) that you’d likely never attempt in speech.
As screenwriters, we’re often writing speech. Our goal is to make it feel unwritten.
With dialogue, I generally aim for a slightly optimized version of how people would actually talk. That is, I consider many ways a character could express an idea in that given moment and choose the one that works best. Not only am I looking at the “meat” of the line — the reason why they’re saying it — but also how the line ends. Ideally, each line of dialogue invites the next line, either through an implied question or challenge (“You wouldn’t say he’s arrogant, though.”), or patterns that suggest what’s to follow.
MARY
I just adore Reggie! His wit, his charm...
TOM
His money.
MARY
His money is adorable.
The danger is that being too clever can make something feel written — the audience becomes aware of the writer, rather than the character. You have to consider the genre and the audience. One of the most sobering jobs in a rewrite is killing dialogue that is terrific but wrong.
Back to the video: McWhorter argues that texting is best thought of as “fingered speech.” It looks like writing, but it’s an emergent form of language that is quickly developing its own conventions. I buy it.
I also really enjoyed McWhorter’s earlier book, [Our Magnificent Bastard Tongue: The Untold History of English](http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1592404944/ref=as\_li\_ss\_tl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=1592404944&linkCode=as2&tag=johnaugustcom-20). I [wrote more about that](http://johnaugust.com/2009/our-magnificent-bastard-tongue) back in 2009.
Scriptnotes, Three Page Challenge, Transcribed, Words on the page, Writing Process
John and Craig discuss the odd dislocation writers experience when writing movies in coffeeshops and windowless offices. We’re literally “someplace else” with our characters, but learning how to work in less-than-ideal circumstances is part of the screenwriter’s trade.
Then it’s another round of Three Page Challenges, wherein we wrestle with the question of why “two months earlier” keeps cropping up. Whatever the reason: stop it.
LINKS:
* [RIP Michael France](http://www.tampabay.com/news/obituaries/michael-france-screenwriter-and-beach-theatre-owner-dies/2115065)
* Mitchell and Webb’s [Working from home](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=co_DNpTMKXk) sketch
* How to [submit your Three Pages](http://johnaugust.com/threepage)
* Three Pages by [Charlie Lyons](http://johnaugust.com/Assets/CharlieLyons.pdf)
* Three Pages by [Lisa Scott](http://johnaugust.com/Assets/LisaScott.pdf)
* Three Pages by [Kevin Graham-Caso](http://johnaugust.com/Assets/KevinGrahamCaso.pdf)
* [Ulysses III](http://www.ulyssesapp.com/) for Mac
* That Mitchell and Webb Look [BBC Two site](http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b0092s71) and [on Hulu](http://www.hulu.com/that-mitchell-and-webb-look)
* Mitchell and Webb’s [Homeopathic Emergency Department](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HMGIbOGu8q0), [Angel Summoner and the BMX Bandit](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sbzUfV3_JIA) and [Write This](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sifESist1KY) sketches
* OUTRO: [Beatboxing Inspector Gadget Flute Remix](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=59ZX5qdIEB0)
You can download the episode here: [AAC](http://traffic.libsyn.com/scriptnotes/scriptnotes_ep_85.m4a).
**UPDATE** 4-21-13: The transcript of this episode can be found [here](http://johnaugust.com/2013/scriptnotes-ep-85-another-time-and-place-transcript).