John August

Words on the page

Dashes, ellipses and underground monsters

Episode - 51

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QandA, Scriptnotes, Three Page Challenge, Transcribed, Words on the page

John and Craig answer four listener questions, on topics ranging from scene headers to ticket sales. And which is better for an aspiring screenwriter: a low-level job at a major agency, or a steady 9-to-5 job that allows time to write?

Then it’s another round of the Three Page Challenge, with three new samples submitted by brave listeners. Our ongoing thanks to everyone who sent in pages. We have plenty — you don’t need to send more.

LINKS:

* Three pages by [Terrance Mulloy](http://johnaugust.com/Assets/TerranceMulloy.pdf)
* Three pages by [Mario DiPesa](http://johnaugust.com/Assets/MarioDiPesa.pdf)
* Three pages by [Andrew Lauwasser](http://johnaugust.com/Assets/AndrewLauwasser.pdf)
* [2012 box office YTD](http://boxofficemojo.com/yearly/?view2=ytdcompare&view=releasedate&p=.htm)
* [The Anarchist Cookbook](http://www.amazon.com/dp/0962303208/?tag=johnaugustcom-20), by William Powell
* [New Dorp Library](http://www.nypl.org/locations/new-dorp)
* [Meadows Library](http://boulderlibrary.org/locations/meadows.html)
* INTRO: [Scooby’s All Star Laff-a-Lympics](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ecjl9KCPiNk)
* [Killing the Blues](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CgmbQnp_Sbk), performed by John Prine

You can download the episode here: [AAC](http://traffic.libsyn.com/scriptnotes/scriptnotes_ep_51.m4a).

**UPDATE** 8-24-12: The transcript of this episode can be found [here](http://johnaugust.com/2012/scriptnotes-ep-51-dashes-ellipses-and-underground-monsters-transcript).

Better yet, don’t write anything at all

Words on the page, Writing Process

I quite like Colson Whitehead’s tongue-in-cheek [writing advice](http://www.nytimes.com/2012/07/29/books/review/colson-whiteheads-rules-for-writing.html?_r=3&src=me&ref=general&pagewanted=all):

> **Rule No. 6:** What isn’t said is as important as what is said. In many classic short stories, the real action occurs in the silences. Try to keep all the good stuff off the page.

> Some “real world” practice might help. The next time your partner comes home, ignore his or her existence for 30 minutes, and then blurt out “That’s it!” and drive the car onto the neighbor’s lawn. When your children approach at bedtime, squeeze their shoulders meaningfully and, if you’re a woman, smear your lipstick across your face with the back of your wrist, or, if you’re a man, weep violently until they say, “It’s O.K., Dad.”

> Drink out of a chipped mug, a souvenir from a family vacation or weekend getaway in better times, one that can trigger a two-paragraph compare/contrast description later on. It’s a bit like Method acting. Simply let this thought guide your every word and gesture: “Something is wrong — can you guess what it is?” If you’re going for something a little more postmodern, repeat the above, but with fish.

Verbs are what’s happening

QandA, Scriptnotes, Words on the page

This week’s episode finds Craig and John answering questions about agent etiquette, business cards and those troubling rewrites that unravel everything.

From there, John goes on a small tirade about weak verbs and Dungeons and Dragons-style scene description. Good writing: It’s not just for novelists.

There’s some language geekery as well, with a look at the hidden micro-classes of verbs that prevent a reasonable speaker from saying things like, “Whisper Tom the joke.”

All this and more in the 42nd installment of Scriptnotes.

LINKS:

* [Chicago Fire](http://www.nbc.com/chicago-fire/) on NBC
* [Flight](http://trailers.apple.com/trailers/paramount/flight/) trailer
* [Buddha Jones](http://www.buddhajonestrailers.com/) trailer house
* [*Th*-Fronting](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Th-fronting)
* [The Stuff of Thought: Language as a Window into Human Nature](http://www.amazon.com/dp/0670063274/?tag=johnaugustcom-20), by Steven Pinker
* [NYC Subway by Embark](http://itunes.apple.com/us/app/nyc-subway-by-embark-new-york/id450991137?mt=8), the transit app for iOS
* [MacBook Pro with Retina Display](http://www.apple.com/macbook-pro/)
* INTRO: [Captain Caveman and the Teen Angels](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wCr3ZVZZjYA)
* OUTRO: [Verb! That’s What’s Happening](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aWnO98eoZ-o), a Schoolhouse Rock cover by Moby

You can download the episode here: [AAC](http://traffic.libsyn.com/scriptnotes/scriptnotes_ep_42.m4a).

**UPDATE** 6-21-12: The transcript of this episode can be found [here](http://johnaugust.com/2012/scriptnotes-ep-42-verbs-are-whats-happening-transcript).

Understanding house styles

Television, Words on the page

Joanna Cohen spent five years as a writer on the daytime soap *All My Children.* She’ll miss the show, and its [unique vocabulary](http://opinionator.blogs.nytimes.com/2012/02/16/losing-all-my-children/?pagewanted=all):

> I collected a list of “soapisms,” the peculiar and hilarious terms we use in stage direction. No one is ever shocked at the end of a scene. They are “klonged,” “gut-punched” or “pole-axed.” No one has an epiphany. They are “hit by a Mazda.” There is lots of “eyelock” and “liplock.” It would not be unusual to get an e-mail from the editor saying something like, “Josh will no longer be buried alive in trunk. We are going with a wooden coffin. Please track accordingly.”

Unlike feature screenplays, scripts for an ongoing TV show can afford to indulge in some in-jokes and esoterica. After all, the writers know exactly who will be reading them and what they’ll find funny.

Over time, many shows develop a house style. The scripts for Lost, for example, rely heavily on the f-word. “Two for the Road,” an episode written by Elizabeth Sarnoff & Christina Kim, uses “fuck” 96 times.

INT. HATCH – ARMORY – DAY 11

TOTAL DARKNESS as THE DOOR SLIDES OPEN, casting a SHAFT OF LIGHT on Henry, sitting on the COT.

Henry is not only bound by his wrists, but he is also TETHERED to the bed. And fucking TIGHTLY, too.

ON LOCKE. Backlit. Very fucking NOIR. Just looking at Henry. Trying to... make sense of him. The silent moment PLAYS. Then --

HENRY

If you’ve come to apologize, I forgive you for hitting me with your crutch.

(beat)

I’m glad my head didn’t break it.

Boy, is he fucking smug. And Locke ain’t one bit amused --

LOCKE

Why?

HENRY

Now there’s a broad question.

Would you write this way in your spec pilot? Almost certainly not.

But it became the house style of the show, to the degree that “fucking” became the principal adverb: fucking huge, fucking dark, fucking terrifying. Omit the word and you’d lose something, even though the audience never heard it.