John August

Words on the page

Better yet, don’t write anything at all

Words on the page, Writing Process

I quite like Colson Whitehead’s tongue-in-cheek [writing advice](http://www.nytimes.com/2012/07/29/books/review/colson-whiteheads-rules-for-writing.html?_r=3&src=me&ref=general&pagewanted=all):

> **Rule No. 6:** What isn’t said is as important as what is said. In many classic short stories, the real action occurs in the silences. Try to keep all the good stuff off the page.

> Some “real world” practice might help. The next time your partner comes home, ignore his or her existence for 30 minutes, and then blurt out “That’s it!” and drive the car onto the neighbor’s lawn. When your children approach at bedtime, squeeze their shoulders meaningfully and, if you’re a woman, smear your lipstick across your face with the back of your wrist, or, if you’re a man, weep violently until they say, “It’s O.K., Dad.”

> Drink out of a chipped mug, a souvenir from a family vacation or weekend getaway in better times, one that can trigger a two-paragraph compare/contrast description later on. It’s a bit like Method acting. Simply let this thought guide your every word and gesture: “Something is wrong — can you guess what it is?” If you’re going for something a little more postmodern, repeat the above, but with fish.

Verbs are what’s happening

Episode - 42

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QandA, Scriptnotes, Words on the page

This week’s episode finds Craig and John answering questions about agent etiquette, business cards and those troubling rewrites that unravel everything.

From there, John goes on a small tirade about weak verbs and Dungeons and Dragons-style scene description. Good writing: It’s not just for novelists.

There’s some language geekery as well, with a look at the hidden micro-classes of verbs that prevent a reasonable speaker from saying things like, “Whisper Tom the joke.”

All this and more in the 42nd installment of Scriptnotes.

LINKS:

* [Chicago Fire](http://www.nbc.com/chicago-fire/) on NBC
* [Flight](http://trailers.apple.com/trailers/paramount/flight/) trailer
* [Buddha Jones](http://www.buddhajonestrailers.com/) trailer house
* [*Th*-Fronting](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Th-fronting)
* [The Stuff of Thought: Language as a Window into Human Nature](http://www.amazon.com/dp/0670063274/?tag=johnaugustcom-20), by Steven Pinker
* [NYC Subway by Embark](http://itunes.apple.com/us/app/nyc-subway-by-embark-new-york/id450991137?mt=8), the transit app for iOS
* [MacBook Pro with Retina Display](http://www.apple.com/macbook-pro/)
* INTRO: [Captain Caveman and the Teen Angels](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wCr3ZVZZjYA)
* OUTRO: [Verb! That’s What’s Happening](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aWnO98eoZ-o), a Schoolhouse Rock cover by Moby

You can download the episode here: [AAC](http://traffic.libsyn.com/scriptnotes/scriptnotes_ep_42.m4a).

**UPDATE** 6-21-12: The transcript of this episode can be found [here](http://johnaugust.com/2012/scriptnotes-ep-42-verbs-are-whats-happening-transcript).

Understanding house styles

Television, Words on the page

Joanna Cohen spent five years as a writer on the daytime soap *All My Children.* She’ll miss the show, and its [unique vocabulary](http://opinionator.blogs.nytimes.com/2012/02/16/losing-all-my-children/?pagewanted=all):

> I collected a list of “soapisms,” the peculiar and hilarious terms we use in stage direction. No one is ever shocked at the end of a scene. They are “klonged,” “gut-punched” or “pole-axed.” No one has an epiphany. They are “hit by a Mazda.” There is lots of “eyelock” and “liplock.” It would not be unusual to get an e-mail from the editor saying something like, “Josh will no longer be buried alive in trunk. We are going with a wooden coffin. Please track accordingly.”

Unlike feature screenplays, scripts for an ongoing TV show can afford to indulge in some in-jokes and esoterica. After all, the writers know exactly who will be reading them and what they’ll find funny.

Over time, many shows develop a house style. The scripts for Lost, for example, rely heavily on the f-word. “Two for the Road,” an episode written by Elizabeth Sarnoff & Christina Kim, uses “fuck” 96 times.

INT. HATCH – ARMORY – DAY 11

TOTAL DARKNESS as THE DOOR SLIDES OPEN, casting a SHAFT OF LIGHT on Henry, sitting on the COT.

Henry is not only bound by his wrists, but he is also TETHERED to the bed. And fucking TIGHTLY, too.

ON LOCKE. Backlit. Very fucking NOIR. Just looking at Henry. Trying to... make sense of him. The silent moment PLAYS. Then --

HENRY

If you’ve come to apologize, I forgive you for hitting me with your crutch.

(beat)

I’m glad my head didn’t break it.

Boy, is he fucking smug. And Locke ain’t one bit amused --

LOCKE

Why?

HENRY

Now there’s a broad question.

Would you write this way in your spec pilot? Almost certainly not.

But it became the house style of the show, to the degree that “fucking” became the principal adverb: fucking huge, fucking dark, fucking terrifying. Omit the word and you’d lose something, even though the audience never heard it.

Observations on the evolution of screenwriting based upon reading one script from 1974

Formatting, Words on the page

Last week, I needed to read a screenplay written in the early 1970s. I think it’s the earliest-dated script I’ve read that wasn’t reprinted in a book.

It had clearly been typed. As in actually typed on a typewriter. Corrections had been made with a pen. I couldn’t smell cigarette smoke on it — this was a photocopy — but I definitely got the sense that an ashtray had sat beside the typewriter as it was written.

On the page, it looked largely like current screenplays — elements had roughly the same margins — but there were some noticeable differences:

* ANGLES (especially POVs) were called out and given their own scene numbers in ways we never would today.

* Locations got much less writer attention. In this script, a kitchen is a kitchen. In today’s scripts, every location gets at least a color line (“stainless steel and subway tiles, with an $8000 convection oven that’s never been used.”)

* There were a lot of “AD LIBBED goodbyes” and such scattered throughout the script. You don’t see that much today, even in projects that use ad-libbing. If a character has a speaking part, you write the lines.

By “evolution,” I don’t mean that screenwriting has gotten better, by the way. It’s just gotten different, the way fashions change. Modern screenplays work very hard — too hard? — trying to make everything a fun read.

This script, at least, seemed much more interested in just getting it done:

Tom looks Barbara square in the eye. Barbara looks to Norman. After a beat, Norman stands and leaves.

PAN BACK to Barbara. She returns to her knitting.

It’s not thrilling, but you know what you’re going to see. There’s a lot to be said for that.