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Archives for 2011

More on Archer’s odd pre-laps

December 6, 2011 Follow Up, Television, Words on the page

Having seen my post about [Archer’s semi-pre-laps](http://johnaugust.com/2011/archers-semi-pre-laps), the good folks at FX sent over a copy of Adam Reed’s actual script for the Skytanic episode I cited. (FX seems awesome. Let’s all write shows for them.)

I’d been working off a transcript, so it’s interesting to see how those scenes [actually looked on the page](http://johnaugust.com/Assets/archer_excerpt.pdf). (Complete scripts of Archer are available in the Writers Guild library, FYI.)

Some differences worth noting:

1) On the page, we see Malory’s dialogue as a true pre-lap, occurring before the cut.

LANA

Cyril! It’s not what it looks like!

MALORY (O.S.)

Well then what is it?!

INT. MALORY’S STATEROOM -- CONTINUOUS

Malory, arms akimbo, surveys the room. Signs of a struggle. Pam stands nervously over by the bed, wringing her hands. Cheryl/Carol lies face down on the bed, nude and lifeless.

To me, what’s most interesting about Archer’s technique is not exactly where the cut is falling, but the implied line that sets up the next scene. Both Lana and Pam apparently said, “It’s not what it looks like!” Malory’s line seems to answer both questions.

In other cases, the cut repeats the last thing said, but changes the context. Earlier in the episode:

LANA

Psh! Cyril?! With another woman?!

(gestures at herself)

Malory, seriously: look at me.

INT. MALORY’S STATEROOM -- CONTINUOUS

CLOSE ON Cheryl/Carol, looking up at us, eyes slightly bulged, as a man’s hands squeeze tightly around her shapely throat.

CHERYL/CAROL

Look at me! Look at and choke me!

In both cases, the writer is calling attention to the cut. It’s like a literary star-wipe. The technique works great in a heavily-stylized show like Archer, but would feel very wrong in more realistic shows.

2) In Archer scripts, vocal noises without true dialogue are written in brackets rather than parentheses:

LANA

[mortified gasp]

3) A recurring joke in the show is that Malory’s secretary keeps changing her name. I love that they call her Cheryl/Carol in the script, despite the extra typing that requires.

4) Look at what Singh is wearing:

And there is Lana, stripped back down to her bra/panties/stockings, with Singh in the background, stripped down to his Spreefs, rubbing scented OIL on his belly.

Spreefs! It’s funny and just right. Even though the viewer will never see that great word, it makes the script read better.

Scene description matters. It’s a little gift the writer gives the reader.

Screenwriting gurus and so-called experts

Episode - 15

Go to Archive

December 6, 2011 Books, Scriptnotes, Transcribed, Videogames

Craig and John look at why the books and seminars purporting to teach screenwriting are generally terrible, trying to reduce the hard work of the craft to a series of formulas and templates.

It’s a rare podcast in which I sway Craig’s opinion whatsoever, but if you listen really carefully, I think he leaves the show just slightly less negative about screenwriting books than he started. It’s all about degrees with Craig.

Plus, we get a visit from the LAPD, follow-up on residuals, and a bit more about unionizing videogame writers.

LINKS:

* [Crime rates in Los Angeles](http://www.wolframalpha.com/input/?i=crime+rates+in+los+angeles) (Wolfram-Alpha)
* Syd Field’s classic book [Screenplay](http://www.amazon.com/dp/0385339038/?tag=johnaugustcom-20).
* Christopher Volger’s [The Writer’s Journey](http://www.amazon.com/dp/193290736X/?tag=johnaugustcom-20)
* Stuart’s [review](http://johnaugust.com/2011/the-writers-journey-mythic-structure-for-writers) of Vogler’s book
* Linda Seger’s [Making a Good Script Great](http://www.amazon.com/dp/1935247018/?tag=johnaugustcom-20)

(Note that none of the books listed above are actually recommended. But we talk about them, so it feels fair to provide links.)

* Intro: [Jem and the Holograms](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Oz4QRB25DSI)
* Outro: [Exquisite Corpse](http://itunes.apple.com/us/album/exquisite-corpse/id405127549?i=405127554) by Casey Spooner

You can download the episode here: [AAC](http://traffic.libsyn.com/scriptnotes/scriptnotes_ep_15.m4a).

UPDATE 12-13-11: The transcript of this episode can be found [here](http://johnaugust.com/2011/scriptnotes-ep-15-on-screenwriting-gurus-transcript).

Archer’s semi-pre-laps

December 5, 2011 Words on the page

The high winds knocked out our satellite TV, so I’ve been watching previous episodes of FX’s animated series [Archer](http://www.fxnetwork.com/shows/originals/archer/) instead.

If you haven’t seen Archer, it should be added to your list immediately.

Archer does a strange thing I haven’t seen often: the final line of a scene serves as the first line of the next scene.

It’s not a true pre-lap, in which you hear a line of the next scene’s dialogue before the cut. Rather, the same line serves as both the button of the current scene and the (unspoken) opener of the next.

In most cases, the scenes aren’t related at all:

CYRIL

So, uh, yes, the bottom line is that I was unfaithful to you...two, well, three times I guess if a dry-humpy choker counts. And if you can’t see it in your heart to forgive me, I will forgive you, because that’s what love is, Lana. It’s...forgivey, which is not a word – come on, Figgis!

REVEAL he’s standing outside the Von Zeppelin suite, talking to himself.

CYRIL

All right, here we go.

He KNOCKS. Lana opens the door in bra and panties. Back by the bed, Singh rubs himself with oil.

CYRIL

(gasps)

LANA

Oh, why?

SINGH

Hello!

CYRIL

So that’s your idea of a break, huh?

He storms off.

LANA

Oh, Cyril! It’s not what it looks like!

CUT TO:

INT. FIRST CLASS CABIN – DAY

MALLORY

Well then, what is it?

PAM

OK.

REVEAL Cheryl, naked except for a bra, lying face-down on the bed.

PAM

So...Cyril got in over his head...

MALLORY

Jesus! God, did he kill her?

PAM

No no no -- he ran from her, to go confess to Lana, but so then this one starts freakin’ out and long story short, I kinda had to drown her in the tub.

MALLORY

So you killed her?

Cheryl stirs, then COUGHS WATER onto the bed. She passes out again.

PAM

Apparently not. So...good news.

(I don’t have the actual script, so I adapted this from a [transcript](http://archerscripts.com/scripts/S01E07.html).)

It’s a fun technique that fits an animated show well. I think it would be hard to pull off in live-action, in part because it greatly limits your editing ability — you’re locked in on both sides of the cut.

Because of how it’s made, animation can be exactly as tight as you need it.

And because you’ll ask, this parenthetical without dialogue —

CYRIL

(gasps)

— is totally legit in animation. Any vocal sound an actor would make gets a dialogue block when writing for animation. Coming from live-action, it looks weird, but it makes a lot of sense when you’re recording voices separately.

Workspace: Christine Boylan

December 2, 2011 Psych 101, Television, Workspace

Christine Boylan

Who are you and what do you write?
—

My name is Christine Boylan. Most of my day is spent writing and producing television — I started on [Leverage](http://www.tnt.tv/series/leverage/) (TNT), worked on the sweet but never aired alien invasion series Day One (NBC), then [Off the Map](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1587694/) at ABC and now I’m a co-producer on [Castle](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1219024/).

I occasionally write short stories (such as [Hoss](http://www.mulhollandbooks.com/popcornfiction/stories/Hoss_by_Christine_Boylan.html) at Popcorn Fiction) and plays. I’ve also written comic books for DC, Marvel, Boom, Tokyopop and NBC, including two of the Heroes comics.

On the Twitter, I’m [@kitmoxie](http://twitter.com/kitmoxie).

Where and when do you write?

—-

workspaceMost of the time I write in my home office, which is a stone’s throw away from my husband’s office, but, luckily for him, we have doors.

I can write anywhere if I can get the spirit to move me (or I have a heart-stopping deadline) — passenger seat of cars (no motion sickness), trains, planes (usually drunk), the middle of the jungle, etc.

I try to change locations during a long writing session to keep myself going — this might be as simple as moving up to the kitchen and sitting on the annoying bench that hurts my back but keeps me awake, or it might mean just lying on the floor in some kind of weird cobra-pose for an hour and writing there. My office has a giant wood desk that’s more like a table than a desk. I alternate using two different chairs: an Aeron I stole from my husband when I moved in and a [Swopper](http://swopper.com/www.swopper.com/index.html).

I had spine surgery when I was younger, so I try to move around and change positions as much as I can. I have yoga blocks and a foam roller, too. Also, a heating pad. And Vicodin. It’s a back-friendly office.

If left to my own devices, I’m a night person. When I was unemployed and writing my first spec pilot, I would sleep until noon, run errands, and then settle down to write from about 4pm to 8, then break, then 10pm to 4am. That was a very special, very Scotch-driven time in my career.

Now that I’m employed, I find that every TV writers’ room has its own culture and rules, so I adjust my schedule to theirs when the season starts.

John Rogers ([@jonrog1](http://twitter.com/jonrog1)) at Leverage is a productivity nerd, so he likes to use his writing staff to try out new processes. A lot of what we did there has stuck with me: working on a story for 48 minutes, then resting for 12. That one’s inviolable. You can’t fool around too much during a 48, you can’t discuss work on a 12. If caught, John would stop you — “Respect the 12!” — thus inculcating the idea of an earned rest period.

Speaking of rest, Mark Waid ([@MarkWaid](http://twitter.com/MarkWaid)) taught me the value of walking away for a few hours and letting something simmer. If I’ve put in the time, then sleep, then I shower or take a yoga class, an idea will come. Maybe the idea is for the next project, but hell, it’s an idea, and I’ll have it happily.

This has been my schedule since June: I’ll get up at 7, head to the gym for swimming or yoga, then to the Castle offices in Hollywood. We run writers’ rooms all day, usually 10 to 7, and we often have two going at once. Then in the evening I’ll spend two or three hours working on one of my own projects or, if I’m burned for the day, have a drink and watch TV or read.

Weekends are exercise, writing in the afternoons, socializing. If I really need to get a personal project done, I’ll get a hotel room in Malibu or Palm Springs and marathon — room service is very, very helpful.

What hardware do you use?
—-

I have a Macbook Pro at home and on the road, and I sometimes use the desktop Mac provided for me at the Castle offices. If I want a little extra crunch or manual exercise, I’ll hook up the [Das Keyboard](http://www.daskeyboard.com/) recommended to me by the lovely and talented Leverage writer M. Scott Veach ([@mscottveach](http://twitter.com/mscottveach)).

I use an iPad (first gen) for reading scripts and some books (GoodReader and Kindle for iPad, respectively) and watching shows on Netflix or the beautiful HBO Go. I have in the past written entire first draft outlines on my iPhone while on set. (I love being on set. Everyone knows what his or her job is. Boundaries are such a relief sometimes.)

I use index cards — something else I picked up at Leverage — to break story. I have cork squares on an entire wall of my home office, and it’s a nice, big wall space useful for everything from pilots to plays to features. We use white boards at Castle, which I admit I still dislike. I have the distinction of having really terrible handwriting on the board.

What software do you use?
—–

I handwrite my first drafts, which drives some of my colleagues crazy. I don’t know if it’s advantageous or not, but it’s just how my brain works. It’s good to be away from the computer (though I may use the dictionary/thesaurus on the phone or iPad); it’s good to feel the pen in your hand (I use a Libelle fountain pen, because the nib forces me to hold the pen correctly and not hurt my hand); it’s great to see the legal pads (letter sized) stacked up, full of scenes. They may be terrible, they may be marvelous, but they exist, and now you can rewrite them.

So then I type it all up — I use tall document holders from Fellowes (one at home, one at Castle) and I rewrite and edit to an extent while I’m typing that first draft. Then I print and go through it with the red or green pen — the pilot G2 works great. (I can’t stand ball points. Using one feels like scratching nails on a chalk board.) Then I re-type the changes.

If I’m in a real hurry — and on Leverage I had to write the first draft of one episode in a weekend — I’ll get someone in and dictate the script. My gorgeous friend Alex Engel can use all the software and can also read my mind. Unfortunately, he’s now a working writer and I can no longer take advantage of him for long dictation sessions. Sometimes I’ll dictate the boards in the writers’ room to our writers’ assistant at Castle, Adam Frost, and it ends up becoming a rough draft for the outline. Whether I dictate the script or not, I always have a step in the process where I read it through out loud.

Some people are visual, but I’m predominantly aural. I can hear if it’s wrong faster than I can see it.

For software, I use whatever the show uses. My first three shows used [Movie Magic Screenwriter](http://www.screenplay.com/p-29-movie-magic-screenwriter-6.aspx), and I still use it for comic books and stage plays. Castle uses [Final Draft](http://finaldraft.com), which I hadn’t picked up in four years, but I’m getting used to it again.

None of these programs feels particularly elegant to me, though. Hand writing helps me avoid any software frustration early in the process, so by the time I’m typing I feel enough urgency to learn the damn keyboard shortcut and move forward.

For notes and research archives I use [Evernote](http://evernote.com). I don’t know how I ever got along without it…except I do, and the evidence is scraps of paper in project-specific piles all over my office floor.

For organization purposes I swing insanely between [orthodox GTD](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Getting_Things_Done) and [total chaos](http://thegloss.com/career/bullish-how-to-be-a-productivity-unicorn/), but I’ve been through [Things](http://culturedcode.com/things/) and [OmniFocus](http://www.omnigroup.com/products/omnifocus/) and now I use 3×5 cards in a [Levenger Circa PDA](http://www.levenger.com/PAGETEMPLATES/PRODUCT/Product.asp?Params=Category=326-339%7CLevel=2-3%7Cpageid=5654%7CLink=Img).

Sometimes I listen to music when I’m working, usually something without lyrics unless I’m desperately trying to evoke a tone. Then I can put the same song on repeat for a few hours. Otherwise white noise apps are great (I listened to a lot of Amazon jungle sounds while writing Off the Map), and a good, solid metronome helps me find rhythm.

What would you change about how you write?
—

I would eliminate some of the self-loathing that takes up a lot of the energy I need to write. Procrastination is both useful and deadly. Again, if I’m stuck on a problem and I go away for four hours to ride horses, I’ll come back with a solution and I can get to work. But if I’ve procrastinated all weekend and then my time is up, I’m going to go to bed unhappy and have five miserable wake-ups in the week ahead.

I’m a huge fan of Steven Pressfield’s [The War of Art](http://www.amazon.com/dp/0446691437/?tag=johnaugustcom-20) – I have it on my Kindle, I keep a copy on my desk at home, I have an audio version on my iPod. Those lessons unfold themselves every day.

A really good friend of mine, [Jacob Krueger](http://www.writeyourscreenplay.com/ ), instills some of this stuff in his screenwriting classes, acting classes and hypnosis sessions in New York. It’s not about removing blocks per se, but about embracing the part of yourself that puts up those blocks.

Or maybe it’s about needing another Scotch.

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