I recorded this video to illustrate the different ways screenwriters can indicate dialogue is being interrupted. It’s a situation that happens quite often in most screenplays. The choice of how you show it can impact the read.
There aren’t hard-and-fast rules, but there are definitely conventions, and in this video I cover most of them.
Following up on last week’s article, Synthian took it upon himself to count how often screenwriters are actually using them, resulting in “a semi-random sampling of successful multi-decade, multi-genre writers vs their own parentheticals.”
The following numbers do not include non-dialog parentheses such as (O.S.), (V.O.) (MORE), or (CONT’D). They represent only dialogical parentheticals such as (through the megaphone) as well as (beat)s and (pause)s.
THE POSTMAN: 137 pages
161 parentheticals
1.17 parentheticals per page
LA CONFIDENTIAL: 110 pages
99 parentheticals
.9 parentheticals per page
MAN ON FIRE: 128 pages
76 parentheticals
.59 parentheticals per page
Brian Helgeland’s average parentheticals per page: .88
BIG FISH: 124 pages
97 parentheticals
.78 parentheticals per page
THE NINES: 100 pages
57 parentheticals
.57 parentheticals per page
CHARLIE’S ANGELS: 104 pages
109 parentheticals
1.04 parentheticals per page
John August’s average parentheticals per page: .79
DAVID WEBB PEOPLES, 12 MONKEYS: 150 pages
144 parentheticals
.96 parentheticals per page
AARON SORKIN, A FEW GOOD MEN: 149 pages
225 parentheticals
1.51 parentheticals per page
J.F. LAWTON, PRETTY WOMAN: 126 pages
143 parentheticals
1.13 parentheticals per page
TED ELLIOTT & TERRY ROSSIO, PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN: 139 pages
152 parentheticals
1.09 parentheticals per page
With this (obviously limited) sample of 10 screenplays, we find a cohort of successful screenwriters using an average of .97 parentheticals per page. That’s higher than I would have guessed. I’m also surprised to find myself on the lower end of parenthesists.
You often hear you shouldn’t use parentheticals for things other than acting directions (“surprised”, “relieved”, etc… And even use those sparingly).
What’s the accepted tolerance for parentheticals for actions such as:
MINDY
(raising her glass)
I wish to say a few words...
or
JÜRGEN
Wait!
(signaling for the soldiers to stop)
She has the detonator!
Is this a big no-no? A small no-no? Can you get away with it once or twice in a script, if you want to shave off a few lines from a page? Or does it reek of the amateur screenwriter?
— Liam Paris
I’ve used parentheticals in situations similar to both your examples, though I’m more likely to break those lines out as scene description:
Raising her glass --
MINDY
I wish to say a few words...
But as I’ve written about before, there are other situations in which parentheticals make sense, and using them smartly can both trim pages and improve the read. It’s all to your taste and style.
You’ll find A-list screenwriters who write five-line parentheticals and others who eschew them altogether. (Anything you do in a parenthetical could theoretically be accomplished in scene description.)
Read a lot of screenplays and find a style you like. For example, you may find yourself emulating writers who use parentheticals for as-if situations…
TARA
(“damn it!”)
Puppetfuzz!
…or to establish the pacing on a joke. Try it and see what works.
Like CUT TO:’s and sluglines, the use of parentheticals comes down to personal preference. As long as you are consistent and engaging, readers are unlikely to object.
When I write dialogue, I tend to use the parenthetical a lot to describe the mood of my characters or the change in their mood. Also when I have a scene with two characters talking a lot, I tend to put lines of action between the dialogue describing the characters actions while they talk, such as shrugging, smiling, etc. How do you feel about this? Should I just let the actor find out how to react or should I control it by writing more specifically their actions during dialogue?
–Øystein Håland
For those who are unfamiliar with the term, parentheticals are small bits of scene description within blocks of dialogue. For example:
NATALIE
(reeling)
Did Pete ask you to ask me if I wanted to get married?
DYLAN
No! No.
(beat; casually)
He hasn’t said anything to you?
The (reeling) and (beat, causally) are parentheticals. They help communicate the pacing and intention of the dialogue. Without them, the lines read very differently.
Some actors have been known to automatically cross out all parenthetical comments in their scripts, lest their performance be shackled by the writer’s limited vision. If that makes the actor feel better, fine. But there’s nothing inherently awful about the parenthetical. Properly and judiciously used, these comments are an important writing tool.
Screenplays are meant to be read-by directors, producers, editors and countless other creative types-and it’s the screenwriter’s job to communicate crucial details about how the movie looks, sounds and feels.
But that doesn’t mean you script every look, every turn, every smile. Screenwriting is the art of economy, and overusing parenthetical comments will not only break the flow of the dialogue, they’ll drive the reader crazy. If you find you’re using three or more per page, look at whether the dialogue itself is giving enough emotional information. If characters are obviously arguing in a scene, an (angrily) comment is probably unneeded, but you might need to highlight a line that is (sympathetic) or (withering) when it could read either way.
Sometimes these little bits of description end up as free-standing sentences (or fragments), rather than in parentheses. I’ve never heard a good name for these snippets of interjectory description, but every script has them:
Turning to Jason...
Finding the key...
She hands him the disk.
Generally, these little text chunks communicate some important piece of action. What only screenwriters understand is that sometimes you need a bit of screen description to break up a long section of character dialogue, or to give breathing room. In screenplays — unlike stageplays — a page full of only dialogue is considered poor form, so an occasional line of action helps put the reader at ease.