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Search Results for: beat sheet

Should I write a novel or a script?

May 18, 2007 Adaptation, Genres, QandA, Words on the page

questionmarkAfter dreaming of publishing my own stories, either in screenplay form or novel, I finally landed a job writing for a local alternative music publication. With a year of deadlines, word counts, and earning endless scorn from my editor (who I am convinced possess more red ink than blood) under my belt, I now feel comfortable beginning the process of flushing out these stories in a structured form.

My question is: Which format should I pursue?

Through your site, I now understand the plus and minuses of writing a screenplay. And, I take heed into delving into the business end of screenwriting. (I enjoy living in Florida and have little desire to pack up for L.A., at this time.) Also, some of my ideas just seem easier to tackle for a first time screenplay than a first time novel, such as my quirky rom-com outline rather than my existential mind bending sci-fi epic. Finally–not to belittle the screenwriting process–there are some stories that I feel more comfortable sharing credit on the final product compared to other stories I feel so strongly about that I want to collaborate with no one.

I know your personal answer would always be a screenplay. But, have you ever read a friend’s or fellow professional’s script and advised her material is best suited as a book? For what reasons? And, what format would be best for a (semi) unpublished writer? (For some reason, the Premiere magazine feature on Rex Pickett and his struggles to sell “Sideways” as a screenplay keep popping in my head.)

I searched your archives and could not find a similar question to answer my query. If I missed it, I apologize.

— Mike Rabinowitz
Head Writer
REAX Music Magazine

answer iconAssuming you enjoy novels, you should probably write one, rather than writing a screenplay.

I know that seems like heretical advice for a blog about screenwriting, but I think the numbers support me. In the U.S., more than [3,500 novels](http://webcache.googleusercontent.com/search?q=cache:eCBxfetMdAMJ:www.mjrose.com/content/journalism.asp+http://www.pw.org/mag/rose0205.htm&cd=1&hl=en&ct=clnk&gl=us&client=safari&source=www.google.com) are published each year. Compare that to film: For 2006, there were [607 movies](http://pds4.egloos.com/pds/200708/28/11/2006-US-Theatrical-Market-Statistics-Report.pdf) released theatrically.

If you’re looking to put your story out into the world, paper beats film, hands down.Yes, I’m omitting films not shown theatrically. That’s a significant number. I’m also leaving out television, which is kissing cousins with screenwriting. On the book side, however, I’m omitting paperbacks and genre fiction. The total number of books published in the U.S. is 50,000 — and they’re not all gardening manuals.

Beyond the hard numbers, consider the relative levels of authorship. Novels are a final art form — you write a book and that’s it. It sits on a shelf with your name on it. Screenplays, on the other hand, are one link in a long process leading to the final art form: a movie. While it’s your name on the script, the movie is the result of a huge collaboration. Right or wrong, the director will get most of the credit for what makes it on screen.Interestingly, the screenwriter may get a lot of the blame. In my experience, the screenwriter’s name is approximately three times as likely to show up in a negative review than a positive one. That’s a master’s thesis waiting to be written.

So why would anyone write a screenplay?

Based on questions my readers send in, a couple of scenarios come up frequently:

1. **To get rich.** Often, when you read about a new script, the story has a dollar figure attached: “Joe Smoalan sold his spec MONKEY BUTLER to New Line for high six-figures.” One you figure out that “high six figures” means more than $500,000, you realize that there’s a lot of money to be made in screenwriting. Most of the authors you find on the shelves of Barnes and Noble aren’t making that much money.

2. **”I could never write a novel, but…”** Because screenplays have fewer words than a novel, they should be easier to write, right? Besides, everyone’s seen bad movies. It can’t be hard to write one better than [The Grudge 2](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0433386/).

3. **”I could never direct a movie, but screenwriting is just words.”** So much of moviemaking is esoteric and intimidating. Just watching the end credits scroll by is bewildering to anyone outside the industry — who rated the men to pick the Best Boy? But it’s not hard to imagine writing a script. It’s just words and margins.

It will surprise no one when I point out that these are three terrible reasons to write a screenplay.

We’ll start with the money. I get frustrated when journalists treat screenwriting as a kind of lottery, emphasizing the payday rather than the work. Most scripts never sell, and most scripts that do sell, sell for a tiny amount. The reason why you read stories about million dollar sales is because they are pretty infrequent.

In terms of the “I could never write a novel” excuse, yes, some writers seem better suited to one kind of writing than another, just as most painters aren’t sculptors. But creating characters, shaping storylines, and stringing together words in a pleasing fashion are prerequisite skills for both novels and screenplays. I would lose respect for any working screenwriter who professed an inability to write traditional fiction.

It’s true that the learning curve for screenwriting isn’t as steep as it would be for, say, directing. And it costs a helluva lot less. But a screenwriter quickly finds that maintaining a willful ignorance about the moviemaking process is impossible. In order to get your film made, you’re going to have to learn about the physical and political ordeal of production. You can do that in school or on the set, but you’ll soon know your grips from your gaffers.

So back to the original question: Should you write a screenplay or a novel?

The answer is a question: What does your idea want to be?

Do you envision an intimate psychological profile of a half-Korean woman trapped in a mediocre marriage who imagines an affair with her co-worker? That’s probably a novel. The story is largely internal; the action is minor; the stakes are low. In the novel version of your story, you can spend a paragraph detailing her decision to buy percale sheets, describing the different textures and comparing them to the geography of her homeland. In the movie version, she buys sheets, and maybe has a conversation during the process.

Are you looking to write a comedy about a deposed crime boss who goes into witness relocation at a fat camp? That’s a movie. Here’s a test: Can you envision a one-sheet poster? It’s a movie. Could it star Martin Lawrence? It’s a movie. Could you describe it as “something meets something?” (e.g. SOPRANOS meets SISTER ACT) It’s a movie.

What happens if you have a novel-worthy idea, but you’d rather write a screenplay? Tough. Don’t make the mistake of trying to force it into screenplay shape. Yes, some books can be adapted into great movies, but it’s because they inherently had enough cinematic content to make the leap. If yours doesn’t, you’ll only frustrate yourself and your readers.

Blingons and despair

February 28, 2007 Awards, Challenge, Follow Up

[scene challenge]Measured by the number of entries, the first-ever [John August Scene Challenge](http://johnaugust.com/archives/2007/masturbating-to-star-trek) was a surprising success. In terms of quality, well, there was a disappointing sameness that I’m going to blame on the limited nature of the assignment.

Many entries were just a slightly-better version of the existing scene. While a lot of rewriting is polishing and optimizing, a challenge like this one should be seen as a call to arms. Fortune favors the bold, because really, what have you got to lose trying an outlandish approach? It’s not like you’re going to get voted off.Why hasn’t there been a competitive reality show about screenwriting? Oh, that’s right, because it would be incredibly boring.

That’s why I’m handing first place to Liz ([#57](http://johnaugust.com/archives/2007/masturbating-to-star-trek#comment-52995)), who went in a vastly different direction with the scene. It’s not perfect, but it’s disturbing in an interesting way, which counts for a lot. It’s like American Pie as remade by Lars Von Trier.

INT. HOSPITAL ROOM – DAY

Lying in a hospital bed is all that remains of Shane, 19, former college athlete. A chart at the foot of his bed lists his diagnosis as bacterial meningitis, and chronicles a horrifying list of failed treatments and emergency surgeries he has undergone since his admission three days ago. Both his legs and his left arm are now amputated, bandaged-wrapped stumps.

Shane lies in bed, staring off into space. In the background, a television set bolted to the wall is playing an old episode of Star Trek. Shane begins to focus in on the television. The vacant expression on his face is slowly replaced by one of annoyance.

SCOTTY

I cannae do it, Captain! Not in three hours!

KIRK

We need that warp drive, Mr. Scott, and we need it now!

Shane’s eyes drift to where the remote control is located, on a small table to the left of his hospital bed. He moves his left arm-stump, attempting to get at it, but can’t.

SCOTTY

But sir, it’s impossible! You cannae change the laws of physics!

Making an heroic effort, Shane reaches across his body with his good right arm, and attempts to grab the remote. Unfortunately his effort knocks it on the floor. Shane slumps back on his pillow, staring at the ceiling and trying not to cry. He makes a concerted effort to think about something else. Meanwhile, the Star Trek has moved on to a scene with Kirk and a beautiful alien. Shane doesn’t want to watch, but can’t help it. There’s nothing he can do about it.

A quirky expression crosses Shane’s face as he suddenly realizes there may yet be something fun within his reach. He steals a glance around the room. An elderly man on a respirator is asleep in the next bed, but there are no nurses in sight. With his remaining good hand, Shane reaches underneath his sheets, and begins quietly pleasuring himself. He closes his eyes, enjoying it.

SAM

Shane!

Shane’s eyes pop open to see DUSTIN(19) and SAM(20) standing over his hospital bed, aghast.

DUSTIN

Oh my God.

SHANE

(embarrassed)

Guys! Uh, this isn’t as bad as it looks.

Sam and Dustin are speechless.

DUSTIN

Dude... That’s quite possibly the bravest thing I think I’ve ever heard anyone say.

SHANE

What?

SAM

You’re cut to pieces and you nearly died, and it’s not as bad as it looks?

SHANE

Oh... No, I mean, I wasn’t just, uh, whackin’ it to Star Trek... That’s just what’s on... The remote’s on the floor there...

SAM

(not knowing whether to laugh or cry)

Jesus.

A beat.

DUSTIN

It’s good to know you still got all the important parts.

SHANE

Guess I’m just lucky that way.

SAM

Dude, you could totally get a job as a sperm donor. I heard they pay fifty bucks a load!

SHANE

Oh yeah? I’m there, man.

Shane’s false bravado is slipping, and he barely gets out the previous line. He turns his head away from his buddies, and rubs his eyes against his left shoulder-stump.

DUSTIN

(glaring at Sam accusingly, but speaking to Shane)

We’ll come by later. We should let you get some rest.

SHANE

(still not looking at them as Dustin hurries Sam out)

Thanks, guys.

Alone again, with his masturbating success now overshadowed by the bleakness of his future prospects, Shane weeps silently, tears running down his cheeks and pooling on the bed.

Of the more conventional entries, my favorite was probably by Eric Szyszka ([#18](http://johnaugust.com/archives/2007/masturbating-to-star-trek#comment-52758)), who recognized that since the audience fully expects Shane to get caught whacking off, the real opportunity comes in reaching for unexpected references. In this case, Blingons.

INT. SHANE’S BEDROOM – NIGHT

SHANE, 20’s, sits in front of his laptop. Circles encase his sleep-deprived eyes as he types away at his keyboard. A TV set blares in the background; he ignores it.

“Term paper” rests in the upper left-hand corner of the page.

Shane checks the time 6:30 AM. Early sunlight peeks through the window.

He suddenly gets a pop-up ad. A nude woman.

His brow raises and he clicks it.

ON SCREEN

A small chested woman.

SHANE

Mm, not bad. Not really my-

Shane stops in his tracks as he leers up to the TV.

ON TELEVISION

MARINA SIRTIS, portraying Counselor Deanna Troi in a low-cut top, is featured prominently in the shot.

Shane’s lips curl in delight. He starts to masturbate.

ON TELEVISION

LIEUTENANT WORF enters the scene.

Shane suddenly jumps back and grabs his remote.

SHANE

Thank god for TiVo.

He rewinds the scene.

Shane resumes.

DUSTIN, 20’s, Shane’s roommate, abruptly enters the room.

DUSTIN

You wouldn’t believe where I woke up this morning! Do you remember Cynthia?

ON TELEVISION

Lieutenant Worf enters the scene, just as before.

Dustin notices Shane.

DUSTIN

Jesus Christ, dude!

Shane quickly covers himself.

SHANE

Don’t you fucking knock?

DUSTIN

It’s my room too, dick. Wait a second, you jerk off to Blingons?

SHANE

NO!

(beat)

What the fuck is a Blingon?

DUSTIN

Black Klingon.

SHANE

Bling? That’s so wrong.

DUSTIN

Uh, no. B is for black, racist, not “black men wear jewelry.”

(beat)

This is too good not to wake Sam over.

Dustin bangs on the wall.

DUSTIN

Hey, Sam! Shane’s beats it to Blingons.

SAM (O.S.)

WHAT?

Sam staggers in; half asleep.

SAM

Dude, you like Michael Dorn?

SHANE

No, you fucking assholes. Okay, I was jerking off, you caught me. But I wasn’t doing it to Klingon or Blingons or whatever, okay? This is what I was jerking off to.

Shane rewinds the episode too far.

ON TELEVISION

The TiVo freezes on a frame of WESLEY CRUSHER – A 15 year old boy.

SAM

And goodnight.

Sam exits.

SHANE

No! It wasn’t-

Dustin starts to leave.

DUSTIN

I’m putting in a housing transfer.

I’m impressed by all the readers who took the time to enter.Yes, I did read the ones that came in late, or got eaten by the virtual dog. Notably, nearly every scene was better than original, which should give Shane plenty of ammunition to say, “Suck it, Sam.” I fully plan to do this again with a bit more open-ended assignment.

Do you agree or disagree with my assessments? The comments section is your chance to stump for what you think should have won. Just keep in mind that campaigning for your own entry is lame, and will probably be exposed.

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