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Search Results for: parenthetical

Archer’s semi-pre-laps

December 5, 2011 Words on the page

The high winds knocked out our satellite TV, so I’ve been watching previous episodes of FX’s animated series [Archer](http://www.fxnetwork.com/shows/originals/archer/) instead.

If you haven’t seen Archer, it should be added to your list immediately.

Archer does a strange thing I haven’t seen often: the final line of a scene serves as the first line of the next scene.

It’s not a true pre-lap, in which you hear a line of the next scene’s dialogue before the cut. Rather, the same line serves as both the button of the current scene and the (unspoken) opener of the next.

In most cases, the scenes aren’t related at all:

CYRIL

So, uh, yes, the bottom line is that I was unfaithful to you...two, well, three times I guess if a dry-humpy choker counts. And if you can’t see it in your heart to forgive me, I will forgive you, because that’s what love is, Lana. It’s...forgivey, which is not a word – come on, Figgis!

REVEAL he’s standing outside the Von Zeppelin suite, talking to himself.

CYRIL

All right, here we go.

He KNOCKS. Lana opens the door in bra and panties. Back by the bed, Singh rubs himself with oil.

CYRIL

(gasps)

LANA

Oh, why?

SINGH

Hello!

CYRIL

So that’s your idea of a break, huh?

He storms off.

LANA

Oh, Cyril! It’s not what it looks like!

CUT TO:

INT. FIRST CLASS CABIN – DAY

MALLORY

Well then, what is it?

PAM

OK.

REVEAL Cheryl, naked except for a bra, lying face-down on the bed.

PAM

So...Cyril got in over his head...

MALLORY

Jesus! God, did he kill her?

PAM

No no no -- he ran from her, to go confess to Lana, but so then this one starts freakin’ out and long story short, I kinda had to drown her in the tub.

MALLORY

So you killed her?

Cheryl stirs, then COUGHS WATER onto the bed. She passes out again.

PAM

Apparently not. So...good news.

(I don’t have the actual script, so I adapted this from a [transcript](http://archerscripts.com/scripts/S01E07.html).)

It’s a fun technique that fits an animated show well. I think it would be hard to pull off in live-action, in part because it greatly limits your editing ability — you’re locked in on both sides of the cut.

Because of how it’s made, animation can be exactly as tight as you need it.

And because you’ll ask, this parenthetical without dialogue —

CYRIL

(gasps)

— is totally legit in animation. Any vocal sound an actor would make gets a dialogue block when writing for animation. Coming from live-action, it looks weird, but it makes a lot of sense when you’re recording voices separately.

My daily writing routine

October 7, 2011 Workspace

A few weeks ago, I mentioned that I use [Evernote](http://evernote.com) as an all-purpose notebook for storing random ideas. Several readers mentioned that it was the first time they had ever heard of it, and wondered what other tools I was using.

So, in the spirit of [The Setup](http://usesthis.com/), I thought I’d give a breakdown of my daily work habits. In the weeks ahead, I’ll be asking other screenwriters to share their routines. I hope to make this a recurring feature.

workspace

Where and when do you write?
——-

I work in an office built over my garage. Until she was four, my daughter didn’t realize that I was approximately 100 feet away when I went “off to work.” She finally caught on, but we’ve been able to set pretty firm guidelines about when she is and isn’t allowed to interrupt me.

I’m “in the office” from 8:30 a.m. to 6 p.m., but I wander in and out of the house pretty freely.

For the past six months, I’ve been doing most of my “morning work” — reading and blog stuff, such as writing this post — while walking on the treadmill. I MacGyvered an old film festival lanyard to hold my iPad 2, and use an Apple bluetooth keyboard. I find I can think coherently up to about 3.2 miles per hour. (Beyond that speed, it’s genuine cardio and I can only listen to podcasts and such.)

When I’m really writing — that is, buckling down on a specific draft of a specific movie — I try to write five pages a day. Page counts tend to be a better measure of effort than time spent in front of the computer.

When I start a new screenplay, I generally go away for a few days. I find that barricading myself in a new hotel in a new city helps me break the back of a story. I hand-write pages, trying to plow through as much as possible; my record is 21 pages in a day. Writing by hand keeps me from editing and second-guessing. At the start, it’s crucial to generate a critical mass of pages.

Every morning, I send what I’ve written to my assistant to type up. I used to fax pages, but on this last trip I just photographed the pages with my iPad and uploaded them to a shared folder in Dropbox. It’s simple, and guaranteed backup.

If I’m writing something specific to a place, I’ll go there. For Preacher, I went to San Antonio. For Lovecraft, I went to Providence. I could sit in the exact spot Lovecraft wrote his stories. That’s a rare luxury.

Otherwise, I’ll go to Vegas. If you’re not drinking or gambling, Las Vegas is a surprisingly good city for writing: when you get stir crazy, you can walk somewhere new. There are lots of restaurants, and no one looks at you strangely for being alone.

I find I can generally get 40 decent pages out of a good barricading session. I won’t paste the scenes together until I’m more than halfway through a script.

What hardware do you use?
—-

When writing by hand, I like a white, lined, letter-sized writing pad with a very stiff back. It should barely bend. I’ve been using some generic Staples brand.

My preferred pen is the black Pilot G2 (.38 size). It’s cheap; it writes consistently; I never worry about losing one. For proofreading, a colored felt-tip pen is key. I like the Papermate Flairs. Again, cheap and losable.

I alternate between index cards and whiteboards for mapping out stories. If you’re going to be working in television, get comfortable with the whiteboard, because you’re going to be spending a lot of time staring at one.

My main computer is a five-year old Mac Pro. It’s overkill for screenwriting, but I do a fair amount of video editing on it. I have an SSD for a boot drive, and big hard drives in the other three bays (including one for Time Machine). I’ll definitely get a new Mac Pro when the Thunderbolt version ships.

I love bare hard drives. They’re amazingly fast and cheap. The [Voyager Q](http://www.newertech.com/products/voyagerq.php) toaster-style dock works great for making drive clones for off-site backup.

Years ago, I had horrible carpal-tunnel problems, so I changed my setup significantly. I use the SafeType keyboard and an [Evoluent vertical mouse](http://www.evoluent.com/). The keyboard is great, but command-key combos are a bear with it, so I’ve mapped a [Logitech G13 gamepad](http://www.logitech.com/en-us/keyboards/keyboard/devices/5123) to handle most of them. (I wrote in 2004 about my [keyboard setup](http://johnaugust.com/2004/my-new-keyboard-setup). It’s largely the same.)

I have a 30-inch monitor dating from 2004. I love it, but it’s easily overwhelmed with windows. I’m trying to use Mission Control on Lion to keep stuff sorted. I use Harman-Kardon [SoundSticks](http://www.harmanaudio.com/search_browse/product_detail.asp?urlMaterialNumber=SOUNDSTICKS3AM&status=) for speakers. I still use the original iSight camera, the one that looks like a stainless steel film canister.

For travel and kitchen duty, I have a 13-inch Macbook Air. It’s as great as everyone says.

I used to talk on the phone a lot more, and found a [Plantronics S12 headset](http://www.plantronics.com/us/product/s12) essential. I still use it, but phone conversations are not nearly as important as they were just a few years ago.

For podcasting, I’m using the [AT2020 USB microphone](http://www.audio-technica.com/cms/wired_mics/a0933a662b5ed0e2/index.html) and [Sony MDR-7506 headphones](http://pro.sony.com/bbsc/ssr/product-MDR7506/). When in doubt, just use whatever [Dan Benjamin](http://hivelogic.com/articles/podcasting-equipment-software-guide-2011/) recommends.

I adore the [ScanSnap S1500M scanner](http://www.fujitsu.com/us/services/computing/peripherals/scanners/scansnap/scansnap-s1500m.html). It’s a monster that eats paper and makes pdfs. I’ve happily gotten rid of most of my physical files with it.

What software do you use?
—–
I do most of my “real” screenwriting in [Final Draft](http://finaldraft.com). I don’t love it. My greatest frustration is usually with its Smart Type Lists, which invariably want to insert extraneous bits of parenthetical detail after character names, so I end up having to type more letters just to get past its unhelpful suggestions.

I’ve also used [Movie Magic Screenwriter](http://www.screenplay.com/p-29-movie-magic-screenwriter-6.aspx), and found it to be approximately as frustrating in slightly different ways. So it’s a case of the devil you know.

In no way am I slamming these two apps; I’m grateful they exist and afraid they might go away. Over the years, I’ve tried out every new piece of screenwriting software that’s come along and found them lacking.

There are small but important details that you have to get right, such as handling dialogue across a page break. ((Dialogue should break at the end of a sentence. Final Draft and Movie Magic Screenwriter are the only applications I’ve seen get it right.)) I’ve played around with two or three different applications built atop Adobe Air, all of which had unacceptable typing lag.

For the current screenplay I’m writing, I’m trying out [Scrivener](http://www.literatureandlatte.com/scrivener.php). It’s complex, but the underlying logic is consistent and smart and fits nicely with my workflow, since individual scenes can get stitched together quickly. I like that the developer keeps updating it.

On the other end of the complexity spectrum, [Freedom](http://macfreedom.com/) is a dirt-simple shell script that blocks your internet connection for a set period of time. It’s a lifesaver.

Other than screenplays, I write almost everything in [TextMate](http://macromates.com/). Yes, I’m worried it’s going to break one day and the developer won’t be around to fix it. Yes, I’ve tried all the alternatives. I’m so accustomed to how it works — and have set up so many macros and snippets — that the switching costs would just be too high right now.

[Dropbox](http://dropbox.com) seems like magic. In addition to storing my active projects, I keep a folder named Pending in the Dropbox with an alias on the desktop. Anything that would normally clutter up the desktop, I throw in Pending.

[Evernote](http://evernote.com) has become my all-purpose inbox. If I come across something interesting that pertains to something I’m writing — or think I might one day write — I’ll throw it in there. Some of my friends use Evernote for their to-do lists, but I’ve found it too unwieldy.

I’ve used a lot of GTD productivity apps over the years, including [OmniFocus](http://www.omnigroup.com/products/omnifocus/) and [Things](http://culturedcode.com/things/). Right now I’m using [Todo](http://www.appigo.com/todo), which has really good integration between the desktop app and its iOS apps. Before I made the switch, I was using [Listary](http://byportmanteau.com/listary) for the iPhone, which is a smart and fast little app I never hear anyone talking about.

Because it’s included with system software, Preview doesn’t get the attention it deserves. You can easily rearrange or delete pages in a PDF with it, or combine multiple documents. It’s amazing and overlooked.

I use Mail, but recently switched my Gmail-hosted addresses over to [Sparrow](http://sparrowmailapp.com/), which I like a lot. I use Google Calendar instead of iCal. I’ve found it works better for sharing.

I do all my RSS-reading on the iPad now, using [Reeder](http://reederapp.com/ipad/). I use the official [Twitter client](https://twitter.com/#!/download/iphonecom) for Mac and iPhone, but [Twitterific](http://twitterrific.com/ipad/) on the iPad. [Birdhouse](http://birdhouseapp.com) keeps me from drunk-tweeting.

What would you change about how you write?
——-

When I first got started writing, I had a lot of bad habits. As I’ve gotten older, I’ve stopped being so judgmental, so now I just call them “habits.”

The life of a screenwriter can be a lot like that of a college freshman. You screw around a lot, then burn the midnight oil to finish that assignment. You don’t necessarily outgrow that.

Ideally, of course, you work a set number of hours every day and deliver your best material. I’m at my happiest as a writer when I feel myself doing that — excited to sit down and write that next scene. But that doesn’t always happen. It doesn’t *often* happen. A lot of times, writing is just a slog.

I’ve fully accepted that it won’t get easier or more fun. But it can stay interesting, and there’s a lot to be said for interesting.

I’m trying to challenge myself to write projects outside of my comfort zone, either in terms of subject or form (e.g. the Big Fish musical). I find writing prose fiction exhausting, but rewarding, so I’ll probably do more.

And while I’ve resisted collaborating, I’m getting better at it. Once Big Fish hits the stage, I’ll probably try another TV show if I’m not directing a movie. Basically, there’s a lot I want to do. Prioritizing what to write is probably my biggest issue at this point.

Pronunciation jokes

August 8, 2011 Television, Words on the page

In Crazy, Stupid, Love there’s a running joke where the characters keep mispronouncing Kevin Bacon’s character’s last name (Lindhagen). There’s a similar kind of joke in The Hangover where Zach Galifianakis’s character puts the emphasis on the wrong syllable of a naughty word. On film these jokes are extremely funny, but these seem like the kind of jokes that wouldn’t work as well on paper. So my question is two fold:

1. Do you think these types of jokes would be effective on the page? (aka “Should I even bother?”)

2. If so, any thoughts on how best to write something like this? Use accents and junk in dialogue, use a parenthetical, or cue in the reader in an action line?

— Nima
New York, NY

Pronunciation jokes have a tendency to feel cheap and hoary. But when they work, they work — and it’s easy enough to show them on the page.

MARY

(checking form)

Are you Mr. Donaldson?

MAN IN COAT

Doe. Nald. Sohn.

MARY

Excuse me?

MAN IN COAT

The o’s are long.

MARY

Oh.

MAN IN COAT

Yes. Not ‘uh.’ There is no schwa.

MARY

Doughnaldsone.

MAN IN COAT

Three syllables. Doe.

MARY

Doe. A deer.

MAN IN COAT

(unamused)

Nald.

MARY

Nald.

MAN IN COAT

Sohn.

MARY

Sohn. Doe-Nald-Sohn.

MAN IN COAT

Close enough.

Back to her form. A beat.

MARY

Mr. Doe-Nald-Sohn, I’m sorry to tell you your dog is dead.

Frankly, without more context my example feels like a [clam](http://www.janeespenson.com/archives/00000338.php) — a joke that’s become musty through over-use.

But I can imagine scenarios in which its familiarity would actually work in its favor. [Archer](http://www.fxnetworks.com/shows/originals/archer/) could probably weave in this kind of joke simply because of the heightened-deadpan nature of the show. And in the context of a dramedy, the setup is flat enough that it doesn’t really feel like a joke is coming, so the punchline is genuinely a surprise.

Pardon the interruption

January 26, 2011 QandA, Words on the page

questionmarkHow do you write dialogue of one character interrupting another mid-sentence? I’ve seen it as (interrupting) next to the characters name, I’ve seen it below the name and I’ve seen it in the dialogue itself.

— Craig
Los Angeles

You have several choices. Use whichever one works best for the situation.

Truncating the first speaker’s line with double dashes (or an ellipsis) is common:

MATT

I simply can’t tell you how honored we are --

SUSAN

Swellingly!

MATT

Yes. We’re swollen with honor.

A parenthetical (interrupting) may be needed if it’s otherwise unclear that the second speaker is changing topics:

BAIN

No ship has ever navigated a subatomic fissure that size.

LUBOV

Then we’ll be the first. Ensign, bring us about, engines at fifty...

PINCHOT

(interrupting)

Plasma fragment! Dead ahead!

It’s also common for action to interrupt dialogue:

GIDEON

The Great Pigeon Army will never be defeated! Our dirty wings shall fill the sky, and our excrement stain the land!

A red laser light -- a sniper’s aim -- glows on Gideon’s feathered chest. His compatriots COO in alarm.

GIDEON (CONT’D)

Never more will we beg for the baker’s scraps, those piteous crumbs of...

Gideon’s LIEUTENANT WHISPERS into his ear. Gideon looks down at the dot on his chest. He releases a squirt of white from his tailfeathers.

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