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Scriptnotes Episode 506: Good News, Bad News, Transcript

July 7, 2021 Scriptnotes Transcript

The original post for this episode can now be found [here](https://johnaugust.com/2021/good-news-bad-news).

**John August:** Hey, this is John. There’s a few bad words in this episode just in case your kids are in earshot and you don’t want them to hear mild swearing. This is the warning.

Hello and welcome. My name is John August and this is Episode 506 of Scriptnotes, a podcast about screenwriting and things that are interesting to screenwriters. Craig is buried under an avalanche of preproduction on his new show. Luckily we have an amazing replacement. Please welcome back returning guest host Liz Hannah.

**Liz Hannah:** Hey.

**John:** Liz!

**Liz:** What’s up?

**John:** Hey, how are you?

**Liz:** I’m good. How are you?

**John:** Now, I called you last minute. Thank you so much for filling in on this. But then I just realized this morning you were in prep on something yourself, aren’t you?

**Liz:** Yeah. I guess this just makes me way better at juggling things than Craig, so we’ll just add that to the list. [laughs] No.

**John:** More evidence of your superiority here.

**Liz:** Obviously. But I’m in early prep. I feel like he’s diving in. We don’t start hard prep until next week. So I’m just in the getting used to my new place [unintelligible].

**John:** Now do you have any fungus-based zombies in your show?

**Liz:** I mean, I don’t really want to give it away, but hopefully. I don’t know. We’ll see.

**John:** Hopefully.

**Liz:** Yeah. We don’t have the finale written yet so you never know.

**John:** And season two is blue sky. You could do anything.

**Liz:** Exactly. I mean, why not.

**John:** Put a room together and figure it out. Now, today on the show we’re going to answer a ton of listener questions that have been backed up for a while. We’ll talk about what to do when you’re fired, or sometimes what’s harder is actually what to do when have some good news in your life, so we’ll talk about those. Plus I want to do some follow up on spoilers, living wages, multiple timelines, and Liz if you’ll stick around in our bonus segment I’d love to talk about pets because you are a dog owner if I recall correctly.

**Liz:** I am. I’m a dog and a cat owner actually.

**John:** Oh, fantastic. So you can give us both sides of that debate. I’m a dog owner but I also have experience with the pocket pets, the short-lived gerbils and hamsters.

**Liz:** Oh wow.

**John:** So we’ll talk about pet ownership as a screenwriter.

**Liz:** Love it.

**John:** All right. Let’s get right into it. If you are listening to this podcast on Tuesday, the day this comes out, June 29th, I’m going to be hosting a symposium on vaccine storylines in scripted entertainment. So we’ll have a link in the show notes to that, but it should be really great. It’s me and Vince Gilligan, the Kings, Latoya Morgan, Beth Schacter, Mike Schur, David Shore, the Spellmans, both Malcom and Nichelle are all here to talk about how we work vaccines into the storylines for the TV programs that we’re doing. So if you’re curious about how that would work please join us. That is at I think 5pm Pacific Time if you’re listening to this on Tuesday morning when this episode comes out. So please join us there.

Second, Liz, have you been following any of this stuff about the IATSE negotiations and what’s happening with IATSE. Because you’re in prep so this could actually effect you.

**Liz:** I have. I have been following it pretty closely.

**John:** So let’s remember that we often talk on the show about the Writers Guild which is the guild that represents all the writers. There’s a Directors Guild, a Screen Actors Guild. IATSE is sort of a super union that represents almost everybody below the line on a movie. So these are everything from grips and gaffers, but also script supervisors and script coordinators.

**Liz:** Writer’s assistants.

**John:** Writer’s assistants in rooms. So this is a big negotiation happening right now.

**Liz:** It is. And I believe the support staff of the room, meaning the writer’s assistants and coordinators joined I think recently. They’re the most recent additions in the last couple of years. So I think this is their first major negotiation. You know, they are probably the group that gets taken the most for granted in any group in making a television show, at least in my experience.

And it’s really unfortunate to see them under-valued when I think anybody here who has been in a room or has show-run knows that you kind of live and die by your support staff. And I really hope that they are able to get their wages up, which they are asking for. I think the average wage right now is barely livable if not livable, because we also have to keep in mind these are not normally 52-week jobs. These rooms are 20-week to 30 weeks maybe. And often they’re even smaller in the smaller run of rooms. So they need to be paid a livable wage and they need to be appreciated by obviously the room and the showrunners and the EPs, but on up to the studios and networks. They make the shows that you make possible.

So I really hope that they are getting the support they need and are getting movement in those negotiations.

**John:** Yeah. So often as we talk about #PayUpHollywood and the crisis of low wages across the board, it’s nice to always be thinking about, oh, if there were only a union that were protecting these people. And so assistants at agencies have no unions. They don’t have that support. These are people who do have that union support in theory but if their wages are not actually livable it’s not worth a whole ton. So we’ve got to get these people up below these barely survivable wages in many cases, particularly because they’re working piecemeal. They’re working from one show, to another show, to another show.

So, it’s both the responsibility of the union negotiators to make sure that these lowest paid people are getting paid a livable wage, but also on studios and showrunners and everyone else’s behalf to make sure that the people who are in their rooms are actually getting paid enough that it’s viable. Because this is often the pathway into other jobs in the industry.

**Liz:** Absolutely. It’s often the pathway into writing for television, because you have such exposure to the room, to the showrunners. And it’s not only – it is absolutely what you said. It’s jumping from show to show. Often I’ve found it’s following one showrunner, which can be at times really consistent. It can be completely inconsistent depending on what the showrunner does. You know, if they do limiteds that means maybe once a year, once every two years, three years there’s a room.

So, you know, I think there needs to be loyalty to the staff in as much as there’s loyalty the other way. And there needs to be support. And it really is something that I think I’ve seen a lot of conversation about and I’m sure you have too. These are not entry level jobs, which seems like what everybody assumes is this is an entry level job into the room. Being a writer’s assistant, being a script coordinator in no way is an entry level position. Like those are jobs that, sure, it could be your first time as a writer’s assistant, but there’s a lot of pressure in being a writer’s assistant. There’s a lot of pressure in being a script coordinator. As a script coordinator you are the gatekeeper of what is the product that goes to the studio, the network, the talent, the entire crew. If there are things wrong there that you didn’t catch that’s a real problem.

And there’s a lot of training in that. And there’s a lot of nuance in it. And so it’s not like somebody can just walk out and do it.

**John:** Yeah. Liz, just because people may not be familiar with it, can you talk a little bit about what a script coordinator would do on a show like yours? So this is a limited that you’re shooting. So what was the script coordinator’s responsibility as you’re putting together this show?

**Liz:** So we have kind of like a unique situation because we had our room during the pandemic. So we actually opened up – so we were on a Zoom room and we opened up our room to all the support staff, meaning everybody was auditing. Typically in a room you wouldn’t always have your script coordinator in your room. I think oftentimes the script coordinator is not in the room. It really depends.

But we did and we had our script coordinator there as well as our writer’s assistant and all of the showrunner’s assistants in the rooms that we were going. But to answer your question a script coordinator is in charge of all of the drafts, all of the files, coordinating every draft. Making sure that everything from character names to scene locations to scene numbers to clearances for character names, all the way down to you have one line over on an act and I know that you hate that showrunner so how can I help you bring that page up so that it’s actually 56 pages instead of 57. As I said, there’s a real camaraderie I think between the best of relationships between script coordinators and showrunners. You get to know each other’s tendencies and wants.

So it is a very sort of symbiotic relationship at times. And also as a benefit of that as the script coordinator you see every draft, from like the vomit draft to the shooting draft to the rewrites in post to everything. You see everything.

**John:** So it’s a very technical job, but there’s some creative element to it because you have to be able to anticipate what the showrunner actually wants. And you’re that last set of eyes and fingers on the keyboard for that script before it goes into the machinery of production. So it’s the last chance for the script to be perfect before it gets into the beast of production. And then once you’re in the beast of production you may be responsible for some of the updated pages and distributions that need to go out after that point.

**Liz:** Absolutely. And I have to say my script coordinator that I’m working with right now is incredible to the point where she’ll recognize when I’ve overused a word too many times and is like did you want to do this. And like, no, I didn’t. I was quite tired. Thank you so much. And, again, it’s a close relationship because particularly as a showrunner at a certain point your room wraps. And as we are right now in Covid you don’t get to have your writers on set. And so it’s really just you. And so it’s very much you and the script coordinator are kind of drilling in and making sure that it’s good as it can be.

**John:** Now that you’re in prep is the script coordinator still on the job?

**Liz:** Yeah. I still have an episode to write so yes, yes she is.

**John:** All right. Some more follow up. We always love to do our How Would This Be a Movie segment, and one of my favorite ones was at the Austin Film Festival back in Episode 222. And one of the stories was Zola. Do you remember Zola who was the stripper/sex worker who had a series of tweets that were just phenomenal and that came out the week that we recorded that show?

The Zola movie comes out this week. And I’m so excited to see it. It’s only in theaters, but I love when one of these How Would This Be a Movie is actually a movie-movie. So I’m looking forward to checking that out.

**Liz:** I’ve actually been really fortunate enough to see Zola.

**John:** All right. Tell us.

**Liz:** Get ready. It is awesome. It is so different than I think, I don’t know, than I was anticipating. I don’t know what I was anticipating. But it’s an experience. And as much as – I think Janicza Bravo directed it. Jeremey O. Harris I believe co-wrote it. And as much as – I think it’s like capturing kind of the thrill of reading that thread in a way. So it’s sort of edited that way. There’s an energy to it. There’s an excitement to it. You know, there’s a lot of ways they deal with texting which I’m dealing with currently on the show that I’m about to go into production on, but I think we’ve all been dealing with over the past ten years is like how do you show texting on television or in features and have it not just be reading on screen. You know, how do you not now do it sort of in the way that Euphoria does it? And I think they did a really amazing job. Joi McMillon edited it, who she’s an unbelievable editor.

So I think everybody is really going to be kind of blown away by this. That’s my prediction.

**John:** Great. Well I’m eager to go in cold and not have too much anticipation, because definitely whenever we do one of those segments I’m building my version of the movie in my head but I’m really curious to see what version they built. So I’m excited for that.

More follow up. We’ve been talking a lot about spoilers on the show recently. We had several listeners write in to tell us just how wrong we were about spoilers and that obviously we didn’t know anything about writing because we would understand how important it is to have surprise there at the end. And how when you tell a joke you don’t tell the punchline first.

And I’m curious to hear your thoughts on spoilers. And we’ll divide it into two sort of categories of spoilers. There’s spoilers for things like TV shows that are out on the air right now, so a spoiler for Loki, and sort of how you’re feeling about spoilers on Loki for a who that’s week to week. People may not have seen that episode. Versus The Sixth Sense or Citizen Kane or Fight Club. Older movies that everyone could have seen but doesn’t choose to see. What is your feeling of spoilers?

**Liz:** I mean, I guess breaking them into the new version of television movies, I think Loki and all of the Marvel shows have been dropping on weekdays so it’s either Wednesday night or Thursday night. And there’s a lot of people who can’t watch these till the weekend. So I feel like there should be some type of understanding that we don’t talk about the spoilers on Twitter until Monday morning or something. At the same time I just avoid Twitter. If I see somebody say something about Loki I just don’t read it. We don’t have watercoolers anymore. And we’re all still at home for the most part. So I feel like we have to understand that people want to engage and that’s what’s exciting about pop culture, right, is that we’re all engaging in it and that we’re all excited about it.

So, I don’t know, do I get pissy when I see a spoiler that was an accident? Yeah. But also I don’t know that it’s going to fully ruin the experience for me. You know, I want to watch the whole thing. I’m not sure that just because I found out something that maybe is a small spoiler or something is going to totally ruin it.

**John:** Yeah. Your point about Twitter and the watercooler I think is a good one, because if you didn’t want to hear the chitchat maybe don’t hang around the watercooler at the office. I mean, it’s natural for people to want to have those conversations.

Now let’s think about movie spoilers and the sense of like there’s a movie with a big twist in it and you don’t know what the twist is and is somebody ruining the movie for you, someone spoiling the movie by revealing the twist. And that’s where I get a little bit more my fists on my hips here.

**Liz:** Me too.

**John:** It’s not OK to – at a certain point you can’t put police tape around all of popular culture. And you need to be able to talk about the things that are in those movies. And if you’re listening to a film and television podcast like this one I think it’s pretty reasonable that we’re going to talk about those things because they are important things that happened in the course of the story. And that we can appreciate movies for more than just the plot twists that happened in them.

**Liz:** For sure. I also think there’s got to be some type of expiration date on when a spoiler is a spoiler anymore. Like I just recorded a podcast about a West Wing episode and I was like is this a spoiler. Has somebody never seen this? I guess – spoiler alert – they’re suddenly going to find out that Bartlett had MS. You know what I mean?

Also, I think this is a different conversation but to touch on it lightly. We’re all so sensitive right now and everybody is just ready to get in a fight and pick everybody apart for the smallest thing that, you know, something like that feels like everybody is going to gang up. But, you know, like I went and saw Fast 9 last night. I didn’t know anything about it. I didn’t know what was happening. There’s a couple things in there that I was pleasantly surprised and not spoiled by. If I’d been spoiled by them would it have changed my expectations or enjoyment of the movie? I don’t think so. I think it was fun.

**John:** Yeah. And also I think part of the reason why we go and see Fast 9 right away, or we watch the Game of Thrones finale in the taxi on the way back from the airport is because we want to be able to participate in the culture right when it happens and we know that there’s a limited window for that. So it’s not just that we have it unspoiled for ourselves, but so we can actually talk about the thing when it happens. So that’s part of the excitement of experiencing a thing when you can right when it comes out. That’s part of the joy of it, the shared experience.

**Liz:** Exactly. Exactly. Now, I will say if somebody has said I haven’t seen this don’t spoil it for me and then you spoil it for them, don’t do that. That’s not nice. That’s not a nice thing to do.

**John:** Well maybe there should be different rules for like if you and I are in a private conversation then I think to ask about like do you want me to spoil this thing, or have you seen, is absolutely totally fair and valid. Because that’s a one-on-one conversation or a small group conversation. But in popular culture you can’t sort of fragilize everyone just because they may not have seen this one thing.

**Liz:** Couldn’t agree more.

**John:** Cool. All right. Let’s get to our marquee topic here. I want to talk about good news. And I have a clip here to set this up. This is a clip from the 1994 movie Sleep with Me. And this movie if you’ve not seen it you may have seen this clip of Quentin Tarantino having a long rant about how gay Top Gun is. So he has a sort of famous monologue about how gay Top Gun is. But this is also from that same scene you recognize that this party is happening because this guy has just sold a spec script. So let’s take a listen to this clip from Sleep with Me.

[Clip plays]
**Male Voice:** [unintelligible] really hot property. So did you always know that the big guy here was going to make it so big?

**Female Voice:** Of course. It was just a matter of time before Hollywood realized [unintelligible] was the way to go.

**Male Voice:** I’m in the [unintelligible] training program.

**Female Voice:** I heard he got like half a mill. For first spec script? Not bad.

**Female Voice:** Is it Dwayne or Wayne?

[Clip ends]

**John:** All right, so Liz that is about the sale of a spec script and a party being thrown because this guy has just sold a spec script. Did you have a moment where your career changed a lot where you just got a piece of really big, good news?

**Liz:** Yeah. For sure.

**John:** Tell me about that.

**Liz:** When I sold The Post it was a spec. It was a pretty similar experience. It was a spec. I had never sold anything before by myself. And I got a call at midnight that Amy Pascal was going to buy it and she wanted to make it. It was absolutely within sort of 45 seconds of that my life completely turned upside down. And sort of became a domino effect of where I am now. And I’ve had amazing opportunities because I sold that spec.

**John:** Great. So we have a listener question here that I think ties in really well. Megana, if you could ask this listener question.

**Megana Rao:** Abby asks, “This has been a tough year for everyone. I got through relatively unscathed but I dealt with my share of anxiety and depression and to top it all off got dumped by my partner of over two years. Things seemed to be finally turning a corner this month. I just got some potentially exciting news. There’s a production company interested in one of my scripts and I just signed at a small agency. I should be feeling amazing, right? Instead I feel lonelier than ever. This is something I would have celebrated with my boyfriend. My family and close friends don’t work in the industry so it’s hard to explain what this means to them, especially since there’s nothing concrete to celebrate.

“And I feel conflicted about sharing with my friends in the industry, especially those who have been struggling professionally. It feels selfish to expect them to be happy for me. And is any of this even worth celebrating? Is this what the life of a screenwriter is like? Hustling, pitching, facing rejection, and then on the off chance something does work out waiting for years before you can actually share the accomplishment? How do you guys deal with good news?”

**John:** All right, so Liz, how do you deal with good news? And how did you deal with the good news of The Post? Just getting called that Amy Pascal wants to buy your movie and make your movie, what did you do next? What was that next week like?

**Liz:** My now husband, then boyfriend, was actually on location at the time. So I was kind of hiding in my house by myself. I definitely share Abby’s feelings at the same time I’m an incredibly superstitious person. So like I don’t share anything until it’s signed on the dotted line and there’s no way that it can ever be taken back, just because I think particularly in this industry you never know. Things can always go away. Or things can always take a turn.

So I don’t really share anything until I’m very convinced. So it wasn’t until much later, or it was like a week later that the announcement was going out that Amy had bought it that I started telling people. But the crazier one, which happened a few months later, was when Steven Spielberg and Tom Hanks and Meryl Streep signed on, which happened in this 48-hour period. And I had told no one except my husband. And my mom found out on Twitter, because I didn’t know the announcement was going out. That one I’m still reaping the pain of that I did not let my mom know.

But I guess in response to Abby’s question of what do you do, yeah, I mean sometimes it can be really hard, but you have to reward yourself. And I think you real friends are able to see past whatever is going on in their lives, whatever struggle they’re having that’s personal to them, to celebrate you. You know, your success does not mean a lack of their success. Actually your success has nothing to do with them. And so I think when you have friendships that are deep and meaningful people should celebrate each other. And so I think you should be able to share and you should be able to feel proud of yourself.

And then the other thing I would say which is advice I tell everybody which is when you sell something or you get a great job or things like that buy yourself something. It doesn’t have to be like extravagant. It doesn’t have to be one of a kind. But buy yourself something you want that’s not dinner or something like that. That is something tangible that you can hang onto that you can look back on and remember I remember when I bought this for myself at this moment when it was so wonderful and so amazing and I accomplished this.

Because there are always going to be ups and downs. There are always going to be moments where potentially on this project you’re like, ugh, this is terrible and I’m so frustrated. You always want to be able to look back and be like I remember that moment when it was wonderful and how that felt and I want to get back to that.

**John:** Yeah. Something I see in Abby’s email here is that she’s worried about feeling too good about herself, or being over-excited. And it gets reasonable to sort of tap the brakes a little bit about some of the overenthusiasm.

**Liz:** Sure.

**John:** We see people who like go crazy and go nuts and they throw the party, like we just listened to in the clip, where they’re celebrating this giant win and they sort of seem like assholes. And you don’t want to be that person. And you don’t want to set yourself up for disappointment and failure. But I think there’s other extremes to underplay it to the degree which like oh I don’t deserve this, I’m worthless, they’re going to find out, they’re going to see that I’m a fraud. The imposter syndrome kicks in really hard because they’ve had this little bit of success.

And it’s finding that middle ground there can be tough. One of the things I always recommend is just remember to Abby you got there because you wrote something really good, so keep writing. Keep writing and keep up on that level. And recognize that like you’ve achieved a thing and you get to do a whole bunch of new work now because you have this agency, so now you get to go out and have these meetings.

Some of those meetings will be great. Some of those meetings will be terrible. But that’s part of the process as well. So don’t be too afraid to be happy in this moment, but also don’t be too afraid about what comes next.

**Liz:** I think that’s great. I would add I think like don’t be looking for perfection. Don’t think you’re going to go out on your first meeting be like this is it, I’ve met my collaborators for the next 20 years. I think just look at the experiences as a whole. You know, I think have sort of a holistic view about it. And don’t put so much pressure on every meeting, every moment, every conversation. Because here is a certain amount of enjoying it that you have to have. Like this is a job. This is work. We’re so fortunate to have this. But you have to have a little bit of enjoyment in it and a little bit of happiness in it. And a little bit of like this is crazy, I’m here because I sold something I wrote. Have that fun.

**John:** Absolutely. Now the second half of this email is talking about how she has friends who are struggling, or friends who are similarly placed but haven’t actually gotten that agent, or having gotten those meetings, and haven’t gotten that stuff happening. I remember that, too. And so I remember when I first got hired to write stuff and I had other screenwriter friends who were not having the same success I was it was weird, but I always remind myself that I can’t control how other people feel. All I can control is sort of what I’m doing. And so I can still be really positive for them while also doing the work that I’m doing. It’s tough.

Did you have other peers who suddenly you’re working with Spielberg and they’re still in the grind?

**Liz:** Sure. Of course. And I think you’re absolutely right. You know, you can’t control how anybody feels. At the same time I think it goes back to what you were saying before, John, which is there’s a very fine line of being proud of yourself and wanting to have that sort of pride with your friends and rubbing it in somebody’s face. And bragging about it. And I think there’s a very sensitive way to tell your friends that this happened. And I guarantee they’ll be excited for you. And if somebody isn’t excited for you then I think that’s a showing of true colors.

**John:** Yeah. Hey Megana why don’t you hop back on here. Because I’m also thinking Megan McDonnell, your predecessor here, who is also a friend of yours has obviously had a really good run and a really good year. And I’m guessing that she probably went through some of these same things and you were the friend who wasn’t quite there yet. What are you thinking about when you read Abby’s question?

**Megana:** Well, first of all, Megan is a brilliant sci-fi genius writer and so hardworking, so it’s just an absolute joy to watch her career. But to me one of the most appealing parts of this industry is the promise of making cool things with your friends or supporting your friends making cool things. And I think about those sociology network diagrams about how behaviors, habits, and emotions spread thorough those little nodes. Sorry, that’s such a scientific way of thinking about friendship and teamwork. But to me it’s like trust that positivity begets positivity. And so if it’s not happening for you, or for me right now, but it’s happening for my friends, that feels like a signal that things are trending well. Your team is doing well so be excited about that.

You know, I think any time you think of something as a zero sum game it gets you in trouble.

**Liz:** Absolutely.

**John:** That sounds great. And what you talk about in terms of like if one person is successful I think it’s giving you a template for a thing you can do. When I graduated from the Stark program at USC people would say like oh you must have had these amazing alumni who could do all these things and were so helpful, but by far the greatest resource I had coming out of Stark was that I had 24 classmates who were all striving really hard in the industry and we could help each other. And so never discount that lateral networking. That people who are the same level as you are such a great resource because they have information and they are doing the thing that you are trying to do. And you are each other’s best resource.

**Liz:** For sure. I also think that it’s really important, this is not on the question, but it’s just something I think in terms of the success that we’re talking about is have happiness outside of your job. Make sure that you have wins and celebrations and moments that are about your life, not just work, because particularly in this industry there are ups and downs and we’re going to get to the next question which is going to be a down. And I think you have to be able to find joy in your life that does not revolve around whether you sold a script or not.

And when you have that joy selling a script is so much more enjoyable because your whole life is not based on it and your whole happiness is not based on it.

**John:** Yeah. If your identity is so tied up in your being a screenwriter who just sold a script, well that is going to fade and it’s not going to last. So you have to have things that are bringing you consistent joy that is not about your career.

**Liz:** Mm-hmm.

**Megana:** Can I ask you guys a follow up question?

**John:** Please.

**Megana:** Just off of that. Because I think a part of what resonated here and seeing my friends is that there’s something like noble in being an aspiring screenwriter and hustling. And I think that that becomes the sort of identity in and of itself. So was there a moment when you guys had to deal with the identity shift of being like I’m no longer hustling, I’ve kind of tasted the success and I can own this title now?

**John:** Yeah. That’s a really good way to put it. Because I always talk about how there’s not really an experience of breaking in. it’s basically there’s not a wall around it. It’s like you’re working as fast and as hard as you can to keep stuff going. And you’re spinning so many plates. I did definitely notice that at a certain point when I stopped – just economically when I stopped having to worry about sort of like paying rent consistently, that was a real change. And I did feel just an ease and comfort that was not there before.

That’s not really tied into any sort of commercial success. Even after Go came out and was doing well and was acclaimed, that wasn’t the moment where I felt like, oh, I’m in, I’m set. How about you, Liz?

**Liz:** I agree with you, John. I think when I was able to pay rent that felt like a marked shift for me in terms of success. You know, I felt stable in a way which I’d never felt before. But I think going to your question, I still have imposter syndrome. I don’t know that you ever, at least I don’t have that moment where I feel like oh I’ve made it, nobody is going to find out. I think there’s still moments of that.

You know, maybe not every day anymore. But at least once a week that I’m like well it was a good run and I’m excited to have done what I’ve done. And I do think that also keeps me a little bit hungry and some of that energy that I did use to feel when I was scrappy and trying to sell a spec, I constantly feel like I want to prove myself. Not because somebody is disproving me, but because I feel like I want to earn it.

**John:** I’ve definitely recognized a moment where people move past their imposter syndrome and they settle into kind of complacency. And that’s no one’s friend. And I think we can all think of some writers who have become complacent and they just sort of do the thing that they do and aren’t pushing themselves. And that can be an issue, too. But I don’t think Abby needs to worry about that yet. I think she needs to just be landing that first job and getting the next job after that and making stuff. And the thing that’s probably going to improve most for her is once she sees her words on the page becoming scenes on a big screen she’ll recognize that like oh I really can do this thing and I can keep doing this thing.

**Liz:** Absolutely.

**John:** All right, let’s get to the opposite side of this, so from the good news to the bad news. We have two back to back questions. Megana, if you can help us out here.

**Megana:** All right. Kitty in London says, “Scriptnotes is my first port of call for industry advice. So when I got fired recently, or rather replaced to use industry parlance, I turn to you. But having rummaged through your entire catalog I can’t find the episode What To Do When You’re Shit-Canned. Please tell me it exists. If not, please make it exist.”

**John:** We will make it exist today. All right. And how about Erin in LA here.

**Megana:** All right. So Erin says, “I was recently working on a project for over two years with a studio and director. Then instead of telling me straight up and letting me go with a handshake and a thank you I was told to sit tight and wait to hear from them about triggering my next step. Only to then be ghosted for months. After waiting patiently and anxiously for as long as I could I finally asked my agents what the hell was going on and then found out the studio had recently hired a new writer to replace me. But never actually told me or my reps I was off the project.

“It was and still is a pretty embarrassing experience and I’ve never heard from any of the involved execs, producers, or director since again after two-plus years of working together. So obviously I think this is the wrong way to let a writer go from a project. But what is the right way? And why doesn’t anyone seem to do it? When we’re dumped in a crappy and classless way should we push back and stand up for ourselves, or does being a pro writer mean just accepting being ghosted, disrespected, or finding out we’ve been replaced on Deadline as a part of the business we’ve chosen?”

**John:** Ugh. I had such flashbacks in the second email.

**Liz:** I’m having like PTSD right now.

**John:** Yeah. So I have found out relatively recently that I’ve been replaced by a Deadline article. And it’s absolutely the worst feeling. And the reason why it happens is because producers are chicken shits and they don’t want to have a scary conversation, so they don’t call you, and they just find a replacement writer and hire that person without having a conversation with you first. It is absolutely terrible and it happens all the time.

**Liz:** It’s awful.

**John:** Liz, you’ve had something similar?

**Liz:** Oh yeah. I’ve been replaced on a number of projects before and I think – look, it’s never fun. It is a part of this business which we can talk about and unpack later. But definitely best of times is when the exec or the producer or whomever calls you and is like, you know, and your steps are done. It’s not like you’re in the middle of something. But if your steps are done and they call and they’re like, “You know, I think we want to bring somebody in to do X, Y, and Z.” And that sucks but at least they’re being honest with you.

You know, I’ve found out through arbitrations that I’ve been replaced. I’ve found out through production. I’ve found out through word around town. I think there’s a lot of different ways to find out about it. It’s really shitty and it’s exactly what you said. It’s execs or producers or whomever doesn’t want to make that phone call being chicken shit. And it’s never fun. And it’s not how it should be.

**John:** Yeah. I’m thinking back to a really terrible experience I had was on Dark Shadows. And so I was really happy with the script and everything looked like it was going fantastically well. And then I was in Des Moines for a college thing and I get this call from Dick Zanuck who was the producer for Dark Shadows. And he said, “John I’ve got terrible news for you. You’re being replaced on the movie. And I’m so sorry. I feel terrible about it. But this is what’s happening and this is why.” And he talked me through it for like five minutes. And I was so angry and I was so incredibly appreciate to Dick Zanuck for having the guts to make that call. And I told him right then on the call like thank you so much for making this call because otherwise I would have heard about it from somebody else. Or I would have read about it in Deadline. It was the right thing to do because he was a classy producer from the right era who knew how to do it. And so few producers these days are doing that.

And I don’t have great advice for how to get producers to do that because I don’t have good experience. I try to keep up conversation about like hey what’s going on on this project, but they do sort of ghost you and they say, “Oh, we’re still figuring it out,” and it happens. It’s shameful.

**Liz:** It’s shameful. It’s really shitty. It shows you I think ultimately how appreciated writers are in the film industry overall. I’m saying this not to get into the film industry, being a writer is wonderful. Being able to write movies is fantastic. But it’s pretty common knowledge and I think pretty well understood that if you’re the first writer on a feature it is very unlikely that you will be the last writer on the feature.

**John:** If they’ve hired you on to do a project, so it wasn’t your original thing but they hired you on, yeah, there comes a moment where they feel like, oh, maybe we need a new set of eyes, a new something. And it’s often–

**Liz:** Even if you are the original writer. You know, if it’s a studio in particular it’s very unlikely that you will be the last writer on the project. It’s just for whatever reason it is how the industry believes that movies should be made. You know, I think it’s pretty disrespectful to writers to not give them the same respect as any other collaborator on the project, namely producers or directors who their opinion is appreciated from day one till the end, and heard, and valued, particularly if you are the generator of the project, or the person that was hired for the project. There’s a reason they hired you for that project.

So, yeah, I’m with John. I don’t have a lot of advice on how to get over it except that it sucks. And, you know, have a drink. Or do whatever it is that you do to wallow and then get up and write again tomorrow. Because you have to.

**John:** All right. I do have some practical advice here I think.

**Liz:** Oh good.

**John:** So obviously feel your feelings. It’s fine to feel your feelings. Find somebody you can vent to. But then also take a couple steps here. First off, make sure you’re clear on what your drafts are and these are the official drafts. And set them aside because if you go to an arbitration at some point it will be important to be able to show I wrote these things along the way. And if there are emails that sort of tie into stuff that you didn’t actually implement but you had actually discussed, those can be important as well.

Then figure out – if you know who the writer is who is going to be coming onboard I reach out to that writer. And if I’m the person who is coming on to rewrite somebody I generally will reach out to the previous writer just to know this is where the bodies were buried. This is sort of what’s going on. And make it clear that you’re not mad at that writer for coming onboard. You’re mad at the situation. But you want that writer to succeed because that’s going to be the best possible movie that’s actually going to get made. So as hard as it can be to see your kid being raised by somebody else, you want your kid to thrive. And that can kid being your movie will only thrive if that writer is able to succeed. And so if I can help that writer get that movie to a place where it’s actually going to work I will do so.

And so I will try to reach out to that person. It’s not hard to find their email. It’s an awkward email to write, but all the conversations I’ve had who have come in after me, or if I’ve come in after them, have been great. And it just makes the process better and smoother. So if you can make contact with that writer do so because obviously they’re going to have to carry the ball for a while.

**Liz:** I think that’s great. I would also say this goes on the other way which is, you know, as you said if you are the writer who is coming on, which I’ve done, you’ve done John, it is your responsibility in my opinion to reach out to the previous writer and to reach out to the original writer. Because, yeah, it’s not your fault. You’re not in trouble. You’re not the problem. But, you can be the asshole who doesn’t reach out and have that conversation. And say like, hey man, I’m really sorry. This is a shitty situation. What can I do to help? Where are you at? What were you trying to do that maybe wasn’t getting across? What’s the conflict, if there is one?

I think that there’s a lot of value in that, particularly since a lot of the people who are being replaced are first time writers, are green writers. And you only learn when the writer who comes on to replace you reaches out. And has a conversation and says, “OK here’s what I’m going to do. Let me explain it to you why. And what do you think?”

So I think – and by the way, there are times when I’ve reached out and the original writer wasn’t super interested in talking, which is also totally fine. It sucks. It’s not a fun thing to be a part of. But if you are the writer who is replacing somebody I really think it is your responsibility to reach out and have a conversation.

**John:** Yeah. The times when I haven’t done that has been because it’s a weekly and I’m here in the middle of production to build a set of cabinets right there.

**Liz:** Absolutely.

**John:** And that’s not that situation. But if I’m going to be doing some major work I will do it. And also if I’m going to be coming in and doing some kind of surgical work but I’m not rewriting the whole script I will try to write in that other writer’s voice just so it reads like one continuous document.

**Liz:** Absolutely.

**John:** And we know how to do it. We’re professionals. So the underlining message of like it sucks when you’re fired, yes, it sucks. Just try not to carry that bitterness with you. And try not to carry that bitterness with you into other rooms, because you’re going to be going in on meetings on other projects and you could say that I had a great time working on this, someone else is writing this right now, or I really hope it goes into production. Don’t dwell on sort of how angry you were to be fired because that’s not a good look for anybody. It’s not going to get you your next job.

**Liz:** It’s not. And it’s also nobody is going to appreciate it in that room. So, I think, as you said, John, find the person you can vent with. Unfortunately I think every screenwriter has dealt with this, so every professional feature screenwriter has dealt with this.

The first time it happened to me I had a friend of mine reach out and was actually sitting with me while the conversation was happening on the phone. Reached out to me the next day and took me out for drinks and, you know, kind of like walked me through what had happened to him and listened and there’s not a lot to say. It sucks. But the letting go is a really important part of it.

And I also think the getting back to work is important, because if you just sit and you’re bitter, or you just sit and you wallow, or even you get to the point where you watch the movie and you’re like that’s not what I wrote and this is terrible, none of that is helpful in the ultimate goal which is having a long-lasting career.

**John:** 100%. All right, maybe we can squeeze two questions in here. Megana, do you want to start us off?

**Megana:** Great. KD Scruggs writes, “I need to differentiate two timelines a la Sliding Doors in my short script. I currently have a physical descriptor, for example red earrings, pony tail in parenthesis after a character’s first scene mention and every line of dialogue, but it’s super clunky. Thoughts?”

**John:** Oof, that sounds super clunky.

**Liz:** Yeah.

**John:** So when you have two timelines you’re going to want to do something, hopefully in the movie it becomes really clear we’re in one timeline or another timeline. You need to do something in your script to say OK these scenes are this way and those scenes are the other way. As we look at Greta Gerwig’s script for Little Women she ended up putting everything in red for the scenes that were in the past. That’s the only time I’ve seen a two-color script, but she really needed it for what she was doing. Other writers I’ve seen put scenes in italics, or in the slug line they’re say bracket past for when we’re in the other timeline.

Just you’ve got to make it read like a movie and don’t kill us on every line for these back and forths. Any thoughts, Liz?

**Liz:** Yeah. I’m actually dealing with it right now. I have three different timelines that I’m dealing with. So, you know, it’s a little different I guess because it’s not Sliding Doors, but in terms of past and present we just put it in the slug line. It’s, you know, INT. HOUSE. NIGHT (PAST). Is it like the most clever thing to do? No. But people aren’t confused.

We can throw a chyron in the script and you just say, you know, which you don’t have to put in production. But it is just helpful for people when they’re reading. They’re like, oh, this is 2014, this is 2012, whatever it is. And since we’re doing three we do have one section is italicized. I think the italicized is really helpful. It can be – you can also breeze through it at times.

Since this is a short script I actually think the coloring of the script is not a bad idea. You know, it’s clean, concise. And because it’s not past and present that might be the easiest way to do it. But I wouldn’t do the descriptors because I think that’s just going to be brutal.

**John:** It’s going to be too rough to read. All right, what else we got?

**Megana:** All right. Ryan in LA asks, “I have a writer’s group that I’ve been a part of for a few years now and over that time we’ve become really close. I value their notes immensely and I know my writing would not be where it is without them. I recently got staffed on a show and have some paid gigs coming my way. It’s exciting, but I’m the first of my group to reach this point. Is it weird for me to continue to get notes from my notes for projects that I’m being paid to write on and ask them for notes for free?”

**John:** Wow. I’ve never been in a writer’s group like this. Liz, have you?

**Liz:** No, I haven’t.

**John:** So we’re at a bit of a disadvantage here. I would say this reminds me of the sort of good news question. You have friends who are not as successful and you’re sort of coming back to them with this. But you’re still working on scripts. You’re still working on projects and they’re working on projects. I would bring it up and ask them like hey do you feel weird, this is a thing I’m being paid to write, but I would love to keep working with you as a group to do this stuff. And if they say yes then great.

You’re getting something out of them, but they’re also getting something out of you because you have experience working for money on these projects. And so I bet they want to keep you involved in that group.

But Megana you’re in a writer’s group so you tell us. Tell us what you think.

**Megana:** Yeah. I think going back to the same thing. It’s like teamwork and it’s being excited for your friend when they’re doing something and hoping that you get better as they improve in their craft as well. But I have a question, so when you guys are writing a draft or a script like who is reading your drafts before you’re submitting it?

**Liz:** For me it really depends. In TV just the room is reading it. And then we go through notes that way. And then my non-writing producers will read before it goes to the studio. In features I have like three people that I send not like my vomit draft but my first personal draft. Two of them are writers, sorry it’s four people. So two of them are writers and two of them are not writers. But that’s also been developed over the course of the last, you know, almost decade and we kind of all share with each other.

So I guess it’s kind of a writer’s group, but it’s very specific and it’s not as big.

**John:** And with my scripts obviously it’s you because you’re reading the very first things, Megana. And then Chad who is a former assistant from a zillion years ago and a good friend. And a couple other people who I will turn to for their thoughts early on. But, no, I’ve never had that sort of writer’s group where we’re constantly responsible for delivering stuff and meeting and discussing that stuff. And I’ve always envied that but it’s just never been something that’s part of my life.

So I’ll be curious whether as you and Megan and other friends of yours who are in that group become successful how that morphs and changes.

I do think also of Dana Fox and her whole group of amazing writers, you know, Diablo Cody, and Lorene and company, Liz Meriwether, and they’re sort of that same way. They’re a writer’s group but they’re also bestie friends who are reading each other’s stuff and it’s been incredibly helpful for them. So there’s precedent for it.

**Liz:** Absolutely.

**John:** Megana, thank you for these questions.

**Megana:** Thank you guys.

**John:** All right. It’s time for our One Cool Things. Liz, you start us off.

**Liz:** OK, my One Cool Thing is a book. So I recently drove across the country because my dog is five pounds too heavy to be on a plane. So, literally drove across the country. So my sweet baby trash dog could be in the car with us, being on the east coast for production. On that I heard this really interesting interview and subsequently have been reading the book. It’s called Battle for the Soul: Inside Democrats’ Campaign to Defeat Trump by Edward-Isaac Dovere. It’s super fascinating. It starts in 2016. Goes through the entire campaign on the Democrats’ side up until the 2020 election.

There’s really intimate details in there from sort of how Kamala and Biden fought at the first debate to how she was chosen as the VP candidate. It’s a really intimate and detailed book that is really interesting. And so for people who are fans of campaign books I couldn’t recommend that better.

**John:** That sounds great. It sounds like a terrific book that I cannot read right now because I cannot actually follow any political news whatsoever. My brain just broke and I cannot reengage with it.

**Liz:** Can I give you another recommendation then that has nothing to do with it?

**John:** Absolutely. We’ll take it.

**Liz:** Yearbook by Seth Rogan. I’m not sure if anybody has done it yet.

**John:** I’ve heard great things. Yes.

**Liz:** Oh my gosh. First of all, I’m sure reading the book is amazing. Listening to the book, we listened to it on the drive, is incredible. Seth reads it himself and then there’s a bunch of guest stars that come in. Lots of people who play themselves. Sasha Baron Cohen. George Lucas plays himself at some point. It’s really funny. It’s really insightful. There’s a ton of heart. I am not being facetious when I say that it truly got us through 12 hours of driving through dust and farm land and fast food.

So thank you Seth for that. I really appreciate it and I think everybody should check it out.

**John:** Excellent. That definitely is on my to read list. And probably actually my to listen list because that sounds great.

My One Cool Thing is a series of videos by Ryan George called Pitch Meetings and basically the premise is that it is the screenwriter going in to pitch a movie that is an existing, so like Army of the Dead. And so Ryan George plays both the screenwriter pitching it and the executive listening to the pitch. And so it’s the feeling of the pitch, but all of the absurdities of the movie sort of come out in the pitching process. So let’s take a listen to the pitch for Army of the Dead.

**Male Voice:** And it basically walls up the city to contain the spread.

**Male Voice:** Smart. And they declare it’s no longer part of America.

**Male Voice:** Well why was that necessary?

**Male Voice:** Unclear. So eventually the government decides to nuke the city to kill all the zombies.

**Male Voice:** OK.

**Male Voice:** But this casino owner, Tenaka, has $200 million in a vault under his casino. So he approaches this former mercenary, Scott Ward.

**Male Voice:** Oh, and he tells him to assemble a team?

**Male Voice:** He does. So Scott needs some teammates. He needs a safe-cracker obviously.

**Male Voice:** I thought it was Tenaka’s vault. Can’t he give them the code?

**Male Voice:** No.

**Male Voice:** OK.

**Male Voice:** And they also need a helicopter pilot.

**Male Voice:** Oh, they can fly in. That’ll be helpful.

**Male Voice:** No, see the government doesn’t actually allow people to fly into Vegas. It’s restricted air space. But they can fly out.

**Male Voice:** Yes, sir. I don’t care.

**Male Voice:** So Tenaka also adds his own head of security, Martin, to the team. And this guy is real suspicious.

**Male Voice:** Oh, sounds suspicious.

**Male Voice:** He is. So they head to Vegas and Scott’s estranged daughter, Kate, forces herself into the movie because she has a friend that’s inside the city.

**Liz:** Love it.

**John:** Love it. And so I bring this up because it’s easy to sort of make fun of movies and I don’t want to particularly poke at Army of the Dead. But even like the best movies have these like real implausibilities that if you were to try to pitch them would sound absurd. So I just thought that was a really performed and written piece of video on how weird pitches are.

**Liz:** Pitches are so weird, dude. They’re the weirdest.

**John:** Pitches are weird. And so, here, let’s do a quick two minutes on pitching. I always describe pitches as like I just saw the best movie and I want to convince you to see this movie. And so what’s weird is that it’s not really the plot of the movie. It’s the description of the experience of having just watched the movie to me.

**Liz:** Totally. And I think it’s also a bit about you. Like how you tell it is how you’re going to write it. So, I just did this pitch this last week and I’m doing more this week for this feature and like you know the feature itself is not necessarily funny, but like I want it to have humor in it, so I’m funny in the pitch, which feels a little off-kilter. It’s so performative. Everybody is uncomfortable.

The one thing I will say is that I don’t think I’m ever going back to pitching in person again. I’m all in on pitching on Zoom or Teams or whatever the hell that we’re supposed to do. It’s so much easier. You don’t have to do the small chat and awkwardness and memorizing lines like you’re an actor. It’s great. But that’s kind of the only good thing that has happened.

**John:** Yeah. I have a pitch this week and I, like you, I’m pretty good at pitching on Zoom, but for this one I also have a video clip I need to show.

**Liz:** Oh wow.

**John:** And going from slides to video clip is really a beast. And the amount of time that me and Megana have spent trying to optimize video performance has been a lot.

**Liz:** Break a leg.

**John:** The technical challenges. But when do we have to become TV producers, by the way? Like suddenly we’re responsible for all this technology stack in order to pitch our shows. That’s also crazy.

**Liz:** It’s pretty crazy. To the fact that I, you know, I can use my computer and I can type on it and I can do sort of the things I’m supposed to do on it. The second I’m asked to like put a slide show up or share my screen suddenly I go into a panic like I have a dream that I’m naked in my high school. Because the worst thing possible is I share my screen and something horrible is on there that I don’t want anybody to see.

**John:** Oh yeah.

**Liz:** Or like an instant message pops up or something like that. So, it’s truly – I just feel like my anxiety is already high during a pitch. It’s like at an absolute high thinking that I’m going to have to share my screen. So I just stick to reading off of pages and hopefully people have an imagination.

**John:** That’s always a good choice. I will say the one thing I have learned is that I tend to read off of the screen, but I move my pitch to the very top of the screen.

**Liz:** Totally.

**John:** Near the camera so I’m keeping eye contact a little closer there.

**Liz:** 100%. I also just cover everybody’s faces with it. So I don’t even look at anybody on there because I’m just looking at the camera ultimately. You know? But it’s also–

**John:** That’s what you want.

**Liz:** It’s that. And it’s also like I’m not then thinking about their reactions to things, you know. I’m not distracted by, oh, are they buying it or are they not buying it. It gets me a little bit more into the rhythm of my talking and then my producing partner is able to like actually gauge their faces and tell me after like oh they were really into it, or oh I don’t know, things like that.

**John:** Yeah. Another good thing about pitching on Zoom is that Megana can sit in on pitches now, because she would not normally be able to – like she wouldn’t go to Disney with me to sit in on a pitch, or other studio executive assistants can listen in. And it’s great because they get some experience there but they have their cameras off and it’s fine.

**Liz:** Absolutely. Absolutely. I mean, that was what was great about having the room on Zoom honestly was all of our support staff was able to be there and participate and really have the experience of being in a room that typically you don’t have when you’re in a brick and mortar.

**John:** That is our show for this week. Scriptnotes is produced by Megana Rao. It is edited by Matthew Chilelli. Our amazing outro this week is by Zach Lo. If you have an outro you can send us a link to ask@johnaugust.com. That’s also the place where you can send longer questions like the ones we answered today. For short questions on Twitter I am @johnaugust. Liz, you are?

**Liz:** @itslizhannah.

**John:** @itslizhannah. We have t-shirts and they’re great. You can find them at Cotton Bureau. You can find the show notes for this episode and all episodes at johnaugust.com. That’s also where you find the transcripts and sign up for our weekly-ish newsletter called Inneresting where we link to things about writing.

You can sign up to become a premium member at Scriptnotes.net where you get all the back episodes and bonus segments like the one we’re about to record on our pets. Liz Hannah, thank you, thank you, thank you so, so much for filling in at the last minute as co-host. You are remarkable. So thank you very much for doing this.

**Liz:** Thank you, John August. I hope that Craig unburies himself from an avalanche soon.

**John:** We’ll all hope.

[Bonus segment]

**John:** And we’re back. All right, you traveled across the country with your dog because your dog was too big to fly on a plane. So you obviously have a pet and you love a pet.

**Liz:** I do.

**John:** Was this your first dog? Have you always been a dog person? What is your relationship with animals in your life?

**Liz:** This is not my first dog. I’ve always been an animal person. I grew up with dogs and cats. I adopted – my first dog I adopted as an adult I adopted when I was 25. And he was three-legged and four-months-old and allegedly a purebred lab. And then he turned out to be a Great Dane. And so I had to move out of my studio apartment because he was 95 pounds at like a year old.

**John:** Wow.

**Liz:** And so he passed away two years ago and I spent – my husband and had like – my husband went right back into production pretty quickly and I was in a new house we moved into. And I slept one night there without a dog for the first time and I was absolutely not, we’re getting an animal. I just spent seven hours looking at our security camera.

And then we met this little trash dog. And so this is who we have now. And literally she’s five pounds over the limit. She’s 35 pounds. She’s five pounds over the limit to fly. It’s just ridiculous.

**John:** My first dog who was my own dog was my dog Jake who was a pug. And I’d wanted a pug for forever and I would say – on this show we’ve been talking about good news, bad news, when you feel like you had some success. I really felt like I had some success when I was able to get an apartment where I could have a dog. That was really to me like OK I’ve made it because I have a place where I can have my own dog who I can take care of. And that was my little boy for so many years. He was just an absolutely amazing little pug.

So before that we’d had some family dogs. Most of them died when I was really little. And then I had gerbils and hamsters who don’t live very long. They just don’t. And sometimes they let you hold them in their hands, but they’re not great pets. I’m sorry for people who are like big hamster/gerbil people. But like once you’ve had a dog it’s just really hard to really go back to a hamster or such.

**Liz:** It’s hard to ever go back. It’s hard also I think like we have a cat also who is 12 who I adopted like six months before I adopted the Great Dane, Boo, and just keep in mind I lived in a studio apartment with both of these animals for like eight months. So I definitely did not heed the warning of like this is where you get success is when you can have an apartment that can take pets. I just got pets. And it was crazy.

But Lucy is still kicking, our cat, and she is basically feral. Like hates everybody except my husband. And weirdly now the new dog, loves the new dog. Obsessed with Jonesy. Just wants to be around her. Our other dog, Boo, hated him. Never wanted to be around him. But, yeah, I think it’s like once you – it’s also really interesting because Boo was kind of a loner. He definitely loved me and wanted to be around me, but as long as he could sort of see me from his bed he was interested. Jonesy has to be touching me, like at all times.

If I’m around she’s just like I want to be on you or next to you or sleeping right beside you. It’s a very interesting – I just don’t think I could ever go to like a gerbil. There’s like an intimacy and an affection with a dog that there isn’t with other animals. And they sit at your feet while you write. I mean, it’s great.

**John:** Yeah, which is so lovely. They’re there with you, but quiet, which is terrific. I think a dog also provides structure, particularly for feature writers which you and I mostly have been. You’re mostly doing TV stuff. But providing some structure in terms of like you need to be up by a certain point so you can feed the dog and walk the dog. And the dog needs two walks and two meals a deal. It’s some good structure because otherwise my whole day could be just a blur of nothing.

And so when I was a bachelor screenwriter that was really important to have some sense of structure there and my dog provided it for me.

**Liz:** Absolutely. And you also can build in breaks of like, oh, I’m stuck on something, I just kind of don’t want to sit here and stare at my computer. OK, I’ll just go walk the dog for 20 minutes. And I also think there is a – and I’m sure this becomes exponentially more real with children – but there is a bit of life is more important than X, Y, and Z when you have something that you have to literally keep alive. And whose entire – with dogs, you know, their entire purpose is to make you happy and for you to love them and all of these things.

It kind of puts things a little bit in perspective when you’re like oh man this draft is due tomorrow and my life is going to be over if I don’t turn it in perfectly. And then you have to keep this sweet little thing alive.

**John:** And the dog doesn’t care.

**Liz:** No. They don’t.

**John:** So we got the great news of this episode of like, you know, oh you sold a script. The dog is happy, but the dog is always happy. Or you got fired and the dog is like the dog still loves you just the same. The dog has no idea that it’s happening whatsoever.

And it’s good to have – we talked about having some source of joy in your life that is not career-dependent and that can often be a dog, or a cat to some degree, but dogs are the ones providing a little bit more structure there.

**Liz:** Yeah. I’m all in. I’m staring at my sweet little trash dog right now who is passed out from the humidity. So she’s on her nap time.

**John:** And where did you find trash dog? Was it through a rescue agency?

**Liz:** So trash dog’s name is Jones, but we call her trash dog because that is literally what her DNA said she was. We got her, so I had adopted Boo, our former dog, from this place called Dogs Without Borders, which is amazing and based in LA. They were working with a family who brings strays from Iran, specifically Tehran, to Los Angeles. And puts them with families. I had reached out to them and just said like, hey, you know, we’re not ready yet but just in case let me know if you think any dogs come up that we would be right for. And two days later they sent me a picture of Jonesy and we went and met her and we adopted her instantly.

We wanted a small, hypoallergenic, really dumb, lazy dog, and we got a medium-sized shedding machine that is extremely smart and very energetic. But she’s very loving.

**John:** Yeah. My advice if people are looking for a dog is just to put out in the world that you’re looking for a dog and someone will have the dog for you. And so, yes, you can go to all of the rescue agencies and that’s phenomenal. But some of my best experiences have been sort of hey we’re in the market for a dog so if you know of a great dog let us know. Because people will know.

So in the case of Lambert who is our amazing dog right now we were just getting back from Paris and so I put that out into the world and a friend said, oh yeah, we’re actually watching my mom’s dog right now who is phenomenal, but we cannot keep him. And maybe you could come visit. And love at first sight.

**Liz:** Lambert and his human eyes. He’s got real human eyes.

**John:** Such good human eyes.

**Liz:** So real. It’s like E.T. eyes. They’re so real. Yeah, I agree. I think you can also put it up on social media, like hey guys thinking of getting a dog. There’s so many dogs that are looking for homes. And I know a lot of people did the pandemic puppies and things like that. Please don’t give them back. I know that you were home and you could take care of a dog when you were home all the time. Guess what? That’s a living, breathing thing that loves you. Please don’t give it back.

**John:** Oh yeah. Don’t do it. Liz, it is so lovely to catch up with you. It’s been a long year, but we’re coming out of it. And we’re making stuff.

**Liz:** We are. We’re coming out of it. We’re making stuff. I can’t believe we’re halfway through 2021 already. It’s pretty bananas. So, yeah.

**John:** And whenever you drive back with the dog I want to see you here in Los Angeles.

**Liz:** Absolutely. Yes sir.

**John:** Cool.

Links:

* Join John at 5pm, Tuesday the June 29th, for the Ad Council summit about [vaccine storylines in scripted entertainment](https://adcouncilevents.splashthat.com)
* [IATSE Negotiations](https://deadline.com/2021/06/hollywood-union-labor-talks-break-off-resume-july-6-1234774095/)
* [Zola Movie](https://a24films.com/films/zola)
* [Sleep with Me Film](https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0111218/)
* [Army of the Dead Pitch Meeting](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TC1LiBBkDdo&t=22s)
* [Battle for the Soul](https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/607647/battle-for-the-soul-by-edward-isaac-dovere/) by Edward-Isaac Dovere
* [Yearbook](https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/yearbook-seth-rogen/1138692367) by Seth Rogan
* [Get a Scriptnotes T-shirt!](https://cottonbureau.com/people/scriptnotes-podcast)
* [Gift a Scriptnotes Subscription](https://scriptnotes.supportingcast.fm/gifts) or [treat yourself to a premium subscription!](https://scriptnotes.supportingcast.fm/)
* [John August](https://twitter.com/johnaugust) on Twitter
* [Liz Hannah](https://twitter.com/itslizhannah) on Twitter
* [John on Instagram](https://www.instagram.com/johnaugust/?hl=en)
* [Outro](http://johnaugust.com/2013/scriptnotes-the-outros) by Zach Lo ([send us yours!](http://johnaugust.com/2014/outros-needed))
* Scriptnotes is produced by [Megana Rao](https://twitter.com/MeganaRao) and edited by [Matthew Chilelli](https://twitter.com/machelli).

Email us at ask@johnaugust.com

You can download the episode [here](http://traffic.libsyn.com/scriptnotes/506standard.mp3).

Scriptnotes, Episode 505: Making TV Like Features (But Better), Transcript

June 29, 2021 Scriptnotes Transcript

The original post for this episode can be found [here](https://johnaugust.com/2021/making-tv-like-features-but-better).

**John August:** Hey, this is John. Today’s show has two bad words in it, so just a warning. It’s probably PG-13, but you know, just in case.

Hello and welcome. My name is John August.

**Craig Mazin:** My name is Craig Mazin.

**John:** And this is Episode 505 of Scriptnotes, a podcast about screenwriting and things that are interesting to screenwriters. Today on the show we talk about why and how feature writers like Craig are turning their back on the big screen movies that made their careers and are instead making television programs for small screens in support of giant streamers.

**Craig:** So dramatic.

**John:** So we’re not placing the blame entirely on Craig, we’ll be interrogating two other villains. Phil Hay and Matt Manfredi are the writing team behind such big screen movies as Crazy Beautiful, Ride Along, Ride Along 2, Clash of the Titans, The Invitation, and Destroyer. But now they’ve made The Mysterious Benedict Society for Disney+, which debuts on June 25. Welcome Matt and Phil.

**Craig:** Welcome guys.

**Phil Hay:** Hello, thank you.

**Matt Manfredi:** Hey guys.

**Phil:** Thank you for having us and casting us as villains.

**Craig:** Well, I mean, he’s just doing that so that I don’t have to bear the entire burden. It sounds like all three of us are going to be up against the wall here while John peppers us with his rhetoric bullets.

**Phil:** It does seem like this might get really dramatic.

**Craig:** Yeah. It’s going to get confrontational. This is going to be a hard hour.

**John:** It’s going to be a hard hour. But we’re going to make progress as we go through it. We’re going to really learn some lessons, some tears will be shed, and we will get through to the other side. I do want to talk about features versus television, but also you guys are writing partners and we have a bunch of questions saved up from our listeners about writing partner situations, so I hope that you can offer some good advice on that.

How long have you guys been writing together as a team?

**Phil:** We have been writing together for a seemingly endless amount of time.

**Matt:** It just keeps going.

**Phil:** And I hope it’s endless.

**John:** You’re the husband who has no idea how long he’s been married.

**Phil:** No, we’ve been writing professionally together for 26 years, Matt. Is that right?

**Matt:** Yeah. Is that titanium? The anniversary? What do I get you?

**Craig:** Oh my god. I think it’s gold. Or is 50 gold? 25 is meat. It’s meat.

**John:** You get some meat.

**Craig:** A nice roast beef.

**Phil:** I think 28 is the prelap anniversary.

**Craig:** Oh nice.

**Matt:** Wow. See what he did?

**Craig:** You know I’m coming up in 13 days from this recording will be my 25th wedding anniversary.

**John:** Congratulations.

**Matt:** Congratulations.

**Phil:** Congratulations.

**John:** Nicely done. Really, congratulations Melissa.

**Craig:** Way to go, Melissa. Like what a remarkably patient person. You know what? She’s doing fine. Let’s not turn her into some sort of martyr. She’s doing fine.

**Phil:** Feels like John’s mission today is to create a lot of dichotomies and a lot of—

**Craig:** Tear people down.

**Phil:** Uh-huh.

**John:** Also to say for our bonus segment for premium members I want to talk about shooting during a pandemic, because you shot this show entirely during the pandemic, so I want to hear what you learned from that and what you will carry forward into future productions.

But first let’s talk about that land that you used to be in, features. I sent through this article by Daniel Victor about MoviePass which has been a frequent subject of scorn on this podcast. Craig, what’s your take on MoviePass and what are we now learning about MoviePass?

**Craig:** Well we learned is that sometimes the obvious is in fact the obvious. So early on in MoviePass’s lifetime you and I both expressed confusion, bordering on anger, on how this plan could possibly work. It just didn’t make sense on its face. So eventually they fell apart and we thought well there you go, we were right. You just can’t make money doing something where you spend more than you make. But it turns out that in fact MoviePass, once they realized that they were about to head into a freefall, instead of just giving up they decided to try and save themselves by sneakily limiting the amount of movies their most frequent users could see.

So it’s a bit like an all-you-can-eat buffet that suddenly starts like, whoops, our door doesn’t work, you can’t come in. It’s like that. So they had—

**Matt:** Before you get more bacon, you’re going to need to change your password.

**Craig:** Correct. So they would do things like if you were seeing too many movies they would force you into a password reset and then that password reset just wouldn’t work. They would say, oh, there’s fraud here, but there wasn’t. They just made it up. And then they wouldn’t respond to requests. And essentially so there’s a phrase in programming called Sending you to Coventry. It’s from the war. So in WWII, sending someone to Coventry, they would do it with a spy. If they figured out that somebody was sending messages to the Germans, rather than confront them, they thought it would be better to just have them continue to send messages but reroute them to nowhere. So that person kept going, so they could keep reading the intelligence they were sending.

And that’s kind of what MoviePass did. They just sent people to nowhere. And now in addition to being out of business, they are also under investigation by the federal government. Good.

**John:** Yeah. It’s so hard to fine a business that’s out of business, but I guess it’s sort of important to sort of take care of it for the next time through, to call this out. But this answers some of my questions about what they thought they were doing versus how they actually worked, because it reminded me of this strategy called Blitzscaling. So remember Amazon, like Amazon sort of shouldn’t have worked, but eventually they got so big that they sort of had to work. They actually achieved this kind of scale.

And I think MoviePass thought they would achieve a kind of scale that they could actually negotiate prices with these theaters and it would all work. It just didn’t work and so they were just left floundering trying not to burn through all their money.

**Phil:** Well it’s also like the concept of the loss leader, which we all learned a long time ago, but at some point it’s worth it to spend a lot of money to gain customers period. But at some point you have to convert that into something. And also it feels like a too good to be true situation.

**Matt:** Also, if you have a loss leader you need to have another product.

**John:** Yeah.

**Craig:** Right. Exactly.

**John:** That cheap rotisserie chicken in the front of the grocery store, that’s so you’ll buy other things in the store.

**Craig:** The hamburger is $0.99 so that you buy a soda, which is all profit, but I guess my question for you guys is why did any of these people who ran this thing think for any moment that it could work? What possible future contains success for this plan?

**John:** Well, think about Netflix. So remember Netflix when it was still a DVD business.

**Craig:** Let’s talk about that.

**John:** So they had problems where they had some people who would get those two DVDs and they would go through it so quickly that Netflix was losing money on some customers. But it wasn’t most of their customers. And I think that’s really the fatal flaw here is that they really misassumed how often people would use MoviePass. They thought people would use it and not really get the full value out of it, but instead millennials sort of saw this as a lifestyle subsidy and would use it up and they would just use it constantly.

**Craig:** So the very thing they were advertising they were hoping their ads wouldn’t work and that people wouldn’t do it. It’s so weird. Anyway, they were nuts and they’re out of business and under investigation. Yay.

**Phil:** And it worked too well, because I think what they were counting on makes sense, because they thought people were going to do what I do which is see something interesting that they want to subscribe to and then forget about it. And then harvest any number of months or maybe even years of a small fee that you forget about.

**Matt:** Yeah.

**Phil:** And people just liked using it too much, because it’s great to go to the movies for almost no money.

**Craig:** For free.

**Phil:** Yeah.

**Craig:** Crazy.

**John:** So, Matt, do you have any subscriptions to things that you are not using? Things you have just forgotten to cancel?

**Matt:** Oh yeah.

**Craig:** Phil.

**Matt:** Yeah. And I get updates every month, but the problem is if someone else in my family has subscribed to that I have to figure out which computer I can get on to unsubscribe. Like my daughter is into swimming, but the pandemic kind of took that away for a bit. And so we have this swim times app for various meets. And I don’t know when she’s going to swim again. But we get a monthly update for that.

There’s all kinds of things. It’s very hard to unsubscribe.

**John:** Now if you want to subscribe to Scriptnotes, it’s Scriptnotes.net and it’s $4.99 a month.

**Phil:** Very transparent. That’s a very ethical and transparent process.

**Craig:** That was just sweaty.

**Matt:** God that was efficient.

**Craig:** That was thirsty.

**John:** All right, let’s try a less thirsty transition here. I want to start talking about television and I thought was set up I was watching an episode of a show this last week that made me think of it. And so in this episode it’s set in the ‘70s and one of the characters is an aspiring writer. And he has this revelation that he should probably stop writing books and should start writing for television because that’s where all the best storytelling is happening. So let’s take a listen to a clip.

[Clip plays]

**Male Voice:** I’ve seen it. I have glimpsed through the veil of time.

**Craig:** What the fuck are you talking about? I didn’t understand a goddamn – did you understand any of that? Either of you?

**Male Voice:** Your passion is admirable, but worlds coming to life on television? None of the good stuff is on TV.

**Craig:** TV is shit. It’s for morons.

[Clip ends]

**Craig:** That’s solid acting.

**John:** That’s an episode of Mythic Quest, an episode called Backstory written by Craig Mazin and starring Craig Mazin.

**Craig:** Well, I wouldn’t go so far as to say “starring.”

**John:** Costarring Craig Mazin. With all the best lines written for Craig Mazin.

**Craig:** The true star of that episode is Josh Brener.

**Phil:** Craig Mazin, OBE.

**Craig:** OBE. Josh Brener delivering those lines there as a young C.W. Longbottom, the character played by F. Murray Abraham. Boy, that Josh Brener, by the way, can I just say, wow. Brilliant. Just a great actor.

**John:** He’s great. I remember him as Big Head and really having almost no character to play.

**Craig:** Everybody knows him as Big Head and I’m just announcing to Hollywood like seriously pay attention. He’s just phenomenal.

**John:** All right. Don’t try to distract us from the real topic here. Craig, your character has a [unintelligible] about how stupid television really is.

**Craig:** Which in the early ‘70s was a fact. I mean, I remember in elementary school there was a push for us in arts and crafts class to create little posters with crayon and such tracking the hours of television we watched purposely to reduce it because television would “rot your brain.”

**John:** Yeah. And you were not a television writer at the start of this podcast. So 10 years ago you were not a television writer. And now you are mostly a television writer. So I want to track that change and sort of how your opinions have changed, but really involve our two guests here this week because you guys are not television writers and now you find yourselves running this TV show for a streamer.

So, what changed? What made you decide to go from making features to making this as a series? Phil?

**Phil:** Well, I think in this case it was just very specifically the book and the situation and feeling like this was a feel and a vibe and a tone that felt really important that we wanted to do. To be clear, speaking for myself, really always have considered myself a movie person. And I think in life I am a movie person. And I’m really committed to that form of art. And I think what’s interesting is you know making a television show that has eight episodes is, you know, there’s congruent things to making a movie to making that style of television show. I’ve never made a television show that had 24 episodes in a season or anything like that.

So along that spectrum there’s a lot of different approaches. And I think specifically this was just a book that we loved and a kind of thematic landscape that we wanted to do. And it was too big to be a movie. I think there was a way to think about it as a movie, but it was always framed to us as a potential television show. And so I think we inherently walked in assuming that.

**John:** So Matt, Phil says you walked in assuming that. So this was not a property that you came to them with. Basically they said we think this is a TV show and what is your guys’ first approach to this property as feature writers. Like how did you approach adapting The Mysterious Benedict Society which is a middle grade fiction book series into a series? What was your first way in?

**Matt:** It was brought to us by Karen Kehela Sherwood and Jamie Tarses as a television show. It had been set up already and they came to us to see if we wanted to do it. I think the way we approached it was not – we wrote the pilot first. We looked for, having read the book and seen that it kind of basically mapped out for a season of television, we didn’t break the entire season. We thought what’s a good end point for a pilot? What will kind of propel us forward and give the audience an understanding of what the rest of the series would be?

And so it’s somewhat clear in terms of the structure of the book where you might the first one or two episodes, because our series ends up kind of having two pilots based on where the location goes.

We wrote the pilot first and then they commissioned the second episode before they green lit the series. So then we got the writer’s room together. Hired showrunning partners, Darren Swimmer and Todd Slavkin and got the room together and broke the rest from there.

**Phil:** Yeah. And I think it was helpful for us to be able to do it in little bits, because to do the pilot like, OK, we can figure out what the pilot is from this book. And I have in my copy of the novel little yellow Post-Its sticking out still that are like 101 ends here, 102 ends here maybe, and 103 somewhere here. And then to be able to do the second episode, and then we only have six left. And then as Matt said we get our partners together and they’re just very talented and adept at structuring a season. And so then we could together look at it and be like, OK, here’s how we’re going to get to the end and break down the structure.

Because I think Matt and I generally when we write are really intuitive about structure. And so this required a little bit more kind of a grind at structure than we’re used to doing with the films that we write. Because I think especially with the independent films that we do we kind of our in our little zone where we just feel it and having those 26 years of experience helps you do that. But it was interesting to enter TV where it did feel like we needed to hammer that structure a little bit more tactile-y.

**Matt:** We ended up thinking about it a little bit in terms of three act structure. Like the overarching thing because the villain kind of has a master plot, and so the kind of last two episodes with the kind of initiation/foiling of this plot, you know, you quickly see well the first two we’re going to establish, the last two we’re going to get into the climax. And we have just a big second act.

So it was helpful on a macro level to step back and think about it that way. And then get into the fine structure over every episode.

**Phil:** We were confidently calling it a two-part finale the entire time before we had any idea why it had to be a two. We were like well then you have the two-part finale.

**Craig:** That’s not a thing. It’s just two episodes.

**Phil:** And they were like, uh-huh, OK.

**Craig:** It’s the two last episodes. That’s what it’s called.

**Phil:** Bedrock principles. We have written the first two episodes and then of course there’s there two-part finale.

**Craig:** The two-part finale.

**John:** Why did they come to you for this property rather than someone who had done TV before?

**Phil:** I think that there was something about, I mean, Karen and Jamie definitely felt very strongly – they had read and seen stuff we had done. And again it’s not, you know, as you guys know, we and you guys do all different types of things. So there isn’t a “oh that’s just what they do.” And the tone of this story couldn’t be more different than Destroyer or The Invitation which are the last two things that we have done.

But they had had just kind of a spark that said we just feel it’s you and we feel like there’s a sense of optimism that we share that the show shares. And there’s a sense of humor and you guys again would know this. The ability – the show is in many ways a comedy – and the ability to do comedy that’s not R-rated comedy is its own thing. You know, and it’s its own – absurdism is a great doorway into doing comedy that doesn’t have to be R-rated comedy.

And that’s what these books are sort of and there’s a sense of that. And so I think it was maybe almost more about the personal feeling than like looking at things in our past and saying oh it’s kind of like that so it would make sense.

**John:** But you’d also made things. You were producers as well as being feature writers. And so Craig it reminds me of our conversations we’ve had on this podcast for forever about sort of the writer-plus. And in features you started to see some writers who were not just writers, but were also the people who could get stuff made. And it feels like Phil and Matt, but also you are sort of finding that, but really finding it more in television. Is that fair?

**Craig:** More than fair. Because what happens in television is you finally get acknowledged for doing all that stuff. In features as a screenwriter you have to – if you’re that writer-plus you have to behave as a producer, as a filmmaker, you have to be involved in all levels of decision-making and no one can know. No one can know.

**Phil:** Exactly.

**Craig:** Because the director is made of the most fragile material and I guess would collapse to the mere suggestion that the person who wrote everything down might have some thoughts. So, not bitter. In features we work in the shadows when we’re doing this. And in television we are not in the shadows at all.

I pride myself on working with the directors that I make television with. Doesn’t matter about rank or title or credit or who is technically in charge of blah-blah-blah. I want to work in partnership with them. That means we should both be happy. When it’s time to move on we should both be happy with the costumes, the locations, the sets builds. Everything. So I work with directors the way I wish most of the directors I’ve worked with worked with me.

But instead in features they don’t even want you there. Because apparently they’re too delicate and it would hurt. And that it turns out is psychologically damaging. It’s not that working in television makes me feel great. It’s that the pain of hiding – I don’t know how many times I’ve said this. When I hear male feature screenwriters being like why are women complaining so much, I’m like how do you not get it? How do you not get what it means to be the smartest person in the room and you’re not allowed to show it and you have to make other people feel good about themselves in order for you to be heard? How do you not get it? That is what it is working as a feature writer.

**Matt:** And the goal is to be involved, as a feature writer. The goal is to be involved throughout the entire process because you know the stories better than anybody else. And it’s not like you’re sitting there defending it like a goalie or something, like an antagonistic presence. You’re there to kind of yes-and but also think about this in terms of the story. But I think you’re always very much aware that you’re serving at the pleasure of the king or queen.

Whereas in television you are expected to be there and everything kind of flows through you. But like you said, Craig, it doesn’t have to be a dictatorial style of–

**Craig:** I mean, especially for you guys since I don’t know if Karyn shot all of it, or some of it, but when Phil’s wife is working on it I would imagine that you would want to be as collaborative as possible, the way that you guys are in your features. I mean, tell me if I’m wrong, but I suspect the way that you would work with her on a show like that would be exactly the same.

**Matt:** It is, yeah, because our process is so interesting because even though technically when Karyn is shooting an episode of our show we’re the final word on the thing, whereas when we’re shooting one of our movies Karyn is the final word on everything. Because our process is so specific and healthy there’s no difference. Because when we’re making a movie with Karyn it’s going to be, it’s just very clear, she’s going to decide. But it’s a very healthy exchange so that we always feel entirely heard and the same way I think in this experience – you know, this is the only time we’ve done it this way, but there’s just a natural triad that just makes sense.

And I think kind of going back to what you were saying Craig, it’s true, the pain part of doing – because we’ve been lucky. And part of the reason we so aggressively wanted to do our independent movies together is that we could just be free to produce. To write the script and never worry about any other exigencies coming up with the script or other writers. Anything like that. It was just period going to be ours, no doubt.

And then to be free to actually produce the movie and learn how to produce. And that production knowledge then translates really well to television. But the pain of that studio thing, where we were in the same thing, Craig, sometimes. I used to joke it’s like being an Air Force colonel on an aircraft carrier. It’s like you kind of vaguely seem like you have authority, but you have no one in your department. You know what I mean? You’re kind of just an odd character. Always on the side. You know, that’s less fun than being able to just fully engage and not have to be kind of a ghost, which often.

And, again, we had so many times where we were extremely integral to the studio movies we were making, but it was a bit like, oh that’s right, you guys are kind of doing all this stuff.

**John:** I remember having to sort of invite myself into edit rooms. Just really getting in there to fix things because they weren’t used to me being around and didn’t sort of know what to do with me on a feature. And a project I’m working on right now which is somewhere between a made for a streamer and a feature, it’s weird trying to figure out sort of what everybody thinks my place is. And sort of to assume that I have the most authority in there as possible.

**Craig:** And you start to think, oh man, I’m the dog that caught the car here. Because I’m writing most of the episodes of this season by myself, and then Neil Druckmann, we co-wrote a couple. He’s writing another one. So there’s a lot of writing. Then there’s all this other creative stuff that I love, like I mentioned, costumes and production design. And then there’s like talking to agents, trying to get deals done with actors. Discussing publicity. And going through marketing plans. And all of that at times–

**John:** Do you like any of that?

**Matt:** I love the publicity and marketing.

**Craig:** Publicity and marketing, obviously, [unintelligible]. Like I had a meeting today that I actually kind of loved about clearances and what we can show and what we can’t show. But there are times where I think like oh my god there is – being in charge as it turns out is a whole lot of work. So I would say that one of things, if you’re going to make that transition from features to showrunning is you have to know yourself well enough to understand that you can or cannot multitask at a very high level. Because you’re going to need to.

**Phil:** And it’s also great, and in our case we’re so lucky that we found partners that could really willingly and with a great deal of kind of grace under pressure really help handle and manage all of that television production. And really allow us to lean into our strengths in terms of the creative vision of the show. That partnership with Todd and Darren was very critical, because it really liberated us in many ways.

**John:** Now two episodes ago we had Jac Schaeffer on talking about her experiences with WandaVision and she said one of her favorite moments bar none was getting together a writer’s room and actually having writers working on this show which was brand new for her because she was a feature writer. This was her first time working with a TV writing staff.

This is also new for you guys because you have overseen productions before but you never had a writing staff. How is that process for you? How did you go about finding writers and working with writers? What was it like to be a feature writer suddenly overseeing other writers?

**Phil:** It was really interesting because I’d had this very vague vision of what – you hear people talk about writer’s rooms all the time. I mean, knowing so many TV writers. And in many ways it was a lot like I imagined it, and in many ways it wasn’t.

We had a total of five writers besides ourselves, including Todd and Darren, and then three other really great writers. And it was really an interesting thing of just seeing how much the – like realizing that the goal there is to hopefully inspire other people. You know, same way with a screenplay. You’re hoping to inspire a director, then you’re hoping to inspire actors. You’re hoping to inspire financiers. So almost took that approach to the writer’s room. And this show is very, very specific, and very strange, and to kind of help mark the boundaries of what the show is and what the vibe was. And that we realized kind of part of our role was to try to just throw a lot of things out there that would help to inspire other people to slowly get more like, oh, I get it. This is what the show is and this is what the show isn’t.

It was really interesting and really actually a lot of fun, because it was, as you said, we’d never been in that situation before where we had all these people to help.

**Matt:** It was interesting though because things just start to move and it’s a different way of thinking about story and writing. Just the process of it was so different to me, because a lot of times I just need to go off and think for a second. I need to go walk from my office to the car and then the problem would be solved. And this time just like you’ve got this group of people throwing out ideas and it’s fun. And it’s kind of exhilarating and it was a new and kind of interesting thing I thought.

**Phil:** And people do it differently as we were informed. And we learned early like you can do it in so many different ways. In this case we were in there a lot. And I know a lot of other people maybe you come at the beginning of the day and the end of the day. And there’s all this other stuff to do. But we tended to want to be back in there as much as we could. So, I think it can evolve in terms of–

**John:** What were your documents along the way? So as it moved you guys had done a pilot and a backup script. But were there outlines for other documents? What would come out of the room and what were the states of episodes before they were full scripts?

**Matt:** We had a lot of time before production. It didn’t overlap. And so we kind of broke the whole season very roughly and then we kind of finely break 103 on and then at some point if we were doing 105 we’d assign 103 and that writer would do – we did story areas for two or three episodes and then we got those taken off the menu which was so nice.

**John:** How long is a story area document?

**Matt:** Story area document. We would start pitching those just orally to the studio rather than have a round of notes on another document.

**Phil:** I think those were like three pages when we.

**Matt:** Yeah.

**Craig:** For the folks listening at home, when we call episodes 102, 103, 104, the way we number television episodes is the first number is the season number and then the second number is the episode number. So, episode 315 if the 15th episode of the third season. Now you know.

**Phil:** There you go. Thank you, Craig.

**Matt:** I mean, the story area documents, I don’t find them particularly useful. You’re just kind of stating what the episode will be about in a page or three. As a tool to help you write the script I didn’t find those very helpful. Mainly outlines. So 12-page outline for each of the episodes. And we’d look at it for a while and send the writer back to do some revisions and then we’d obviously send to the studio and then they’d go off to write.

**John:** So all episodes were written before production started, correct?

**Phil:** Yeah. I think almost. We might have been writing a little bit of the finale, the second part of the two-part finale.

**Craig:** Two-part finale.

**John:** But did your room still exist by the time?

**Matt:** Part two of the two-part finale was written during production.

**Phil:** Now the room had broken actually right before the Covid shutdown of mid-March. And we had actually really finished. We were maybe going to be in the room another week for kind of odds and ends. But we had sort of perfectly timed to be able to finish. So the room was broken but there was still a lot of writing to do.

**John:** Let’s talk about what writing you guys needed to do on people’s scripts that were not – someone else had written the script but you needed to go through and do some work on that. How did you approach that and did you have conversations with the writers? Did you give writers notes first and then go through and touch it yourselves? It would feel weird to me to not actually be fixing the problems in front of me.

**Phil:** Yeah, it’s a strange but very customary thing that we hadn’t encountered because we hadn’t done TV. But I think in the end if you’re going to be the last word on the script, which was our job to be, then what you’re hoping and what we got, which was fantastic, is writers who get you really close to what is going to cohere and what is going to really sing as the very specific and voice of the show, which is its own thing.

So I think customarily, yeah, you’re really in this situation where you’re hoping to, like I said before, hoping to inspire people to kind of, A, both be able to kind of deliver something close to what you would have done, but, B, surprise you with something that you wouldn’t have considered and there’s plenty of examples of that in the show. You’re trying to manage, you know, I think it’s no news to anyone in television that that’s kind of the job of the people who are the final word on the script. You’re going to have to work on it and really pull it all together. But your hope is that, yes, the writer is going to get another bite at the apple. That’s also how things get better rolling forward.

That process of giving notes to people, having them work on it, talking it through, that’s all part of the grist for the mill.

**Matt:** It’s all with the understanding of like there’s no hard feelings. It’s not a judgment of what you’ve done. It comes to a point where you can’t read our minds in terms of like how we would phrase a certain thing. So there are certain things that we’re just going to do. It’s supposed to flow through us and eventually it does. But like Phil said the hope is that everyone has been prepped well enough through the room and through your notes on the various other documents that they go off and surprise you with something awesome. And that happened a ton.

**Phil:** Yeah. And the goal is that you have every writer feel very invested in their episode, because there is a linkage between whatever brings their special thing and whatever brings the show’s special thing. It’s in there that it can be found.

**John:** Now Megana we have an email from somebody who wrote in with sort of the opposite experience here, so I wonder if you could share that with us and we could talk through what’s happening on this show and what could be improved.

**Megana Rao:** Erased wrote in saying, “I’m working on a TV show from a big name creator. For the episode I wrote the showrunner did small tweaks right before the episode shot. They replaced my name on the title page and turned in the script with their name on it. I learned of this when the script coordinator distributed a draft. I decided not to confront them, but instead to point out the ‘oversight.’ Paperwork had to be reissued and the show creator seemed upset that I was now a credited writer. It seemed to ruin their branded vision of the second season being written by only them and the showrunner.

“The creator took over the writer’s room Twitter account and when we premiered went on a huge PR parade that pushed the narrative that the season was only written by two writers. In the end I got the credit I needed to get into the guild. And when the episode airs it will say my name. But I hate that this creator has gone to such extreme measures to push a narrative that excluded my contributions.”

**Craig:** Yikes.

**Phil:** That stinks. Straight up.

**Matt:** That’s not the way we do business at Hay-Manfredi.

**Phil:** Nor anybody that I think we know. I mean, I think, I don’t know, I think a couple things. If you wanted it to be written by only two people then the answer would be to only have two people writing it. That’s a denial of the reality of the show. But the other thing is not knowing what this is, just I think my general take on these things is similar to being a director in features. If you’re a creator or a showrunner in television, everyone is already going to assume you did everything. They already are going to give you all the credit that you can possibly handle. So the idea of trying to erase someone else can only come from ego, to me.

**John:** Ego and insecurity.

**Phil:** And insecurity. And also the fact that it has a very tangible financial impact on somebody who is by definition making less money than you are, to take away that credit. So, I don’t know, again, we kind of knew this instinctively and talked to many of our friends and again when we partnered with Todd and Darren they’re extremely ethical, very professional, moral guys. And it was just clear when you talk to other professionals that you just don’t do that. It’s tacky.

You know, and I know many people do, but in my opinion it just does not come from a positive place.

**Matt:** It’s like swinging a 3-0 with a big lead.

**Craig:** Yeah, the unwritten rules of baseball, and they’re the unwritten rules of television. And we all know who does it. I mean, people talk about it. And I can think of one guy in particular that people mention all the time who is a serial violator of this unwritten rule.

The instinct behind it I assume is, hey, I wrote on this and maybe the showrunner thinks that he or she did most of the rewriting. Because a lot of times rewriters in their own minds expand their contribution.

**Phil:** Anyone who has done an arbitration can definitely see that.

**Craig:** God knows if you’ve read enough arbitration statements you marvel at it all. But even so, even if you rewrite every word there is a contract and the contract – not legal, but ethically – that you just let it go, because you’re the executive producer, you’re the creator, in some cases you’re the director, and so really what is the fear? That one day that episode is going to win an Emmy and some other person will get up there to take that Emmy even though they didn’t write a lot of the stuff that’s in it? Who cares?

You know what? You’ve just got to be bigger than that. You have to be bigger. It’s part of being professional. And especially now – look, I don’t have a writer’s room, so this is easy for me to say, OK. I get that. I’m writing checks I don’t have to cash. But, now when people are trying to hire folks who generally weren’t hired frequently before, so basically everybody that’s not a white guy, it seems more and more important to keep making sure that you’re pulling them up and you’re keeping the integrity of the ladder in place so they can move up. And the integrity of the ladder comes down to credits. It is money for people who need it.

And you know who definitely doesn’t need the money? The showrunner. Every single time. So, this is déclassé, it shouldn’t be done. You’ve got to be bigger than that. And I’m extending an olive branch to the big name creator and saying I understand the impulse. I do. I get it. And I do believe that there are cases where you have to sit there, perhaps, in the Emmy audience and grit your teeth as somebody that you had to spend a weekend rewriting completely gets up there and thanks everybody for your work. I get that.

But hey, you know what, guess what? Welcome to being a writer in features again. It’s kind of that’s the way it goes.

**Phil:** It all comes back to that.

**Matt:** The way we did it was, and Todd and Darren, this was their method, which was you hire you room and you’re very clear about what’s going to happen. With us, the number of episodes worked out that we said, OK, each of you is going to get an episode. We don’t know which one it will be, but you know.

And if we had had one more writer it would be like each of you is going to get an episode and two of you are going to share an episode. We are not going to take credit on any of those episodes and your name will be on it. Your name will be on an episode. We’re going to get enough credit.

**Craig:** Right.

**Matt:** You know? Like our name appears last and at the beginning and the end of every episode and sometimes it appears like three times. People know what we did.

**Phil:** That’s enough.

**Matt:** And we’re comfortable with acknowledging the work of others.

**Phil:** And as you said, Craig, too, like I mean you also realize that one of the mysterious of screenwriting in television writing world is it’s not – unless it’s something like when we have done our movies where no one else has been part of that writing process period, if there’s multiple people there’s going to be multiple perspectives on what reality is and who did what and who remembers doing something that the other person actually did. And the only way out of those weeds is to just say everyone is responsible for their own perspective on what happened. But what I can do is be ethical and generous.

**Craig:** Generous.

**Phil:** And positive.

**Craig:** Yes.

**Phil:** That’s what I can do. And then everyone else’s stuff is up to them.

**Craig:** We talked about publicity and marketing and all the rest of it. When the publicity thing happens it is fascinating to watch how it all functions. So, in movies you just don’t exist when it comes time for publicity, and if you do it’s just so that someone can say that you did a poor job. And then regardless the director gets this possessive, you know, so-and-so’s movie. And you’re like, what the?

And then in television it’s the other way around. And it’s equally as unfair. I cannot tell you how many times I would read that I was the director of Chernobyl. I was not. I didn’t direct a frame of it. Johan Renck did. All of it. But in television they just gravitate towards the showrunner and assign the showrunner full responsibility for everything. Which means for the love of god if you have a writing room you can share a little bit. You’re not going to go hungry for attention. Good lord. The opposite.

**Matt:** Yeah.

**John:** Now, Megana, we have a bunch of questions saved up for people writing in about writing partner questions and issues. I’m wondering since we have Phil and Matt here if you can ask some questions about writing partner stuff.

**Craig:** I think we might – and maybe we should do a speed round, because we have a bunch of them and I kind of want to get all of these answered.

**Matt:** Let’s do it.

**Phil:** We need to definitively answer all of these questions right now.

**Craig:** Go.

**Matt:** No.

**Megana:** So first up Tom from LA writes in, “I’m in a bit of a bind. Simply put, I want to break up with my writing partner. But I don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings. We’ve been writing together for a while now and over that time have become really good friends, with my wife and her especially growing close. With writing though I dread every time we sit down to write. At risk of sounding conceited, I feel like the gap between our abilities has grown throughout our relationship, to the point that I don’t trust her edits when she rewrites me anymore. Writing alone is hard enough, but this is exhausting.

“We recently turned in a project to financiers and are beginning to meet with production companies and actors about a script we finished in 2020. The conversation of what do we start next has come up and I honestly don’t know what to say. At heart I’m conflict-averse and can see myself unhappily staying in this relationship for a long time just so I don’t have to hurt anyone. What advice do you have for ending a writing partner relationship? How can I go about it in a way that won’t endanger the projects we’ve already written? Or our friendship?”

**Craig:** [laughs] This is where we reveal that Phil asked us to read this question so that he could say, “Well Matt it’s funny that they asked this because…”

**Phil:** Sometimes in the presence of friends it’s easier to get to the…

**Craig:** Witness me.

**Matt:** The answer has to be, you know, you’ve got to rip off the Band-Aid. And this isn’t meant to be condescending, but I was talking with one of my kids the other day and I was like don’t make yourself miserable just to avoid a difficult conversation. It will only get worse. And I think there’s a really graceful way, you know, I think creatively we’re heading in different directions. And that’s not a slight on what you’re doing, but I think we’ve kind of grown apart a little bit as writers and I think we should be free to explore other stuff.

**Craig:** I went through this. I had a writing partner. Fantastic guy named Greg. We wrote a couple of movies together that got produced. And we were a bona fide writing team with a writing team quote and we shared agents. And over time what happened was I started to realize that I was probably supposed to be writing alone. Sometimes the best way to put it, Tom, is it’s not that I don’t want to write with you anymore, it’s that I don’t want to write with anyone anymore. I just want to write with me. Because it is possible that you are a solo act, which is perfectly fine. It happens.

It isn’t a judgment. It isn’t a condemnation. Now, when you are concerned about hurting her feelings what I can tell you is you will hurt her feelings. Sorry, it’s going to happen. And what you don’t want to do as Matt says is just sacrifice your own emotional integrity and joy and pleasure in what is already as you say alone hard enough just because you don’t want to hurt her feelings. Her feelings are going to be hurt, but then she’ll get over it because you’re not being cruel. You’re not being selfish. You’re just being honest about who you are and how you’ve changed.

**Matt:** As my therapist once said about a difficult thing, it’s going to be bad, but it will be finite.

**Craig:** Yes. Tincture of time is what Dennis Palumbo would say to me all the time. Tincture of time. It is amazing how time really does heal everything. It’s insane.

**John:** All right, Megana, next question.

**Megana:** Frustrated and Furious asks, “A friend and I wrote a script together. We agreed it was good and that we needed to get it out there as widely as possible. But all of the reaching out was done by me, exploiting only my contacts and relationships and burning my favors, and none of it was being done by him. I reached out to over 75 friends and contacts. He reached out to two. I tried addressing it with him directly and let him know it was leading to frustration and resentment on my part because he said he would send the script to his contacts and then he wouldn’t.

“We had been knee-deep in planning our next project and I just stopped engaging because I felt as if I was being used for my contacts and my willingness to put myself out there. Now, it’s unlikely I will ever write a script on my own as good as the one we wrote together, so here’s my question. Should I put this issue aside to continue writing scripts with him since the scripts I write with him will be better than those I write on my own? Or should I torpedo our relationship because my cowriter is a weasel and someone who is using me and my contacts for his own personal gain without exposing himself to failure the way I am?”

**Craig:** Whoa. Whoa. Good golly.

**Phil:** Wow. Well I think we all recognize that the key sentence in that is “I don’t believe I will write a script better on my own.”

**Craig:** What else is there to know?

**Phil:** So the question then becomes can you reframe the relationship and what the demands business-wise are in a way that allows you to do your best work? Because there’s plenty of partners out there. Like Matt, there’s a lot of different ways to be partners. Matt and I are the sort of two of the same guy version, where we both are kind of good at the same things and we both try to improve at the same things and all that.

But there’s plenty of partners who one person is an absolutely cannot speak in a meeting. They are just terribly socially awkward and the other one is the face person. But that other person who can’t talk in a meeting or can’t pitch is a brilliant writer and they have an exchange that feels completely equitable and fair to them.

So, everyone doesn’t have to offer the same stuff, but if it’s creating resentment to the level of [weaselry] then you have to address that in one way or the other, but I guess I’m giving you the permission to say that unless this person is kind of doing it in a way that’s errors of commission versus omission, just like this person maybe is not good at reaching out to people, then if you can make an accommodation because the work is better and you like that part of the partnership then it’s possible.

**Craig:** I don’t understand this complaint. I’ve got to be honest with you. Frustrated and Furious, if this works, you send out a script to a whole bunch of people, if it works then you’ll get an agent and then your agent does this for the rest of your career and it’s no longer an issue. This is more of like if the two of you were starting an agency together I would get it, but you are putting this massive stress on how many friends and contacts you sent things out to and that those contacts are valuable. No they’re not. No they’re not. Your script is valuable. Period. The end.

**Matt:** I’m with Craig. If you have one contact, I’m a true believer in good work will out itself.

**Craig:** Yes.

**Matt:** So screenwriting is not about contacts it’s about the writing. And if you’re producing good writing with this person, and like Phil said if you can put your frustration aside, do not worry about the contacts.

**Craig:** No.

**Matt:** Because you’re going to write something and it’s going to take one contact and you’ll be on your way.

**Craig:** I’m frustrated and furious.

**John:** Yeah. I honestly felt like maybe we actually did get the other side of this writing partnership sending us an email as well saying like this guy only is trying to hustle, but he’s actually a terrible writer.

**Matt:** Exactly.

**John:** It’s all hustle.

**Craig:** Then we yell at that guy.

**Phil:** I mean, just to refine a tiny bit, it is a little bit about contacts. Let’s not be, you know what I mean?

**Craig:** A little bit. But it’s such a weird like you won’t email your mother whose daughter went to school with Tom Cruise’s friend. Like who cares?

**Matt:** Yes. And it’s about maintaining relationships and things like that. But I don’t value Phil for his contacts.

**Craig:** Oh well. Well there you and I have to differ. Because that’s the only thing about him I find interesting.

**Phil:** Craig is constantly having me make calls to minor league baseball players for him.

**Craig:** But only to Karyn. Like I’m constantly asking can you ask Karyn?

**Phil:** Exactly. And like you have her phone number. Just call her.

**Craig:** Because John won’t do it.

**John:** I will say in every relationship though there’s the one person who like calls the strangers. Like I’m the person who is going to call that stranger to get this thing to happen. That’s just how we sort of divide stuff up like that.

**Craig:** Oh, you mean like for you and me? Oh definitely. I’m useless.

**Phil:** There’s different roles that can be valuable.

**Matt:** But John is frustrated.

**Craig:** Of course. John carries me around like a dead Siamese twin. That’s a Tim O’Donnell line I stole. I’m just sort of hanging off of him, like I died years ago from sleep apnea but he can’t cut me loose because we share a liver and that’s the way it goes.

**John:** Let’s take a listen to a question from somebody who is at the start of a partnership. Megana what you got?

**Megana:** Margaret asks, “I’m considering pursuing a one-off partnership with a co-writer on a feature film script but I have questions relating to the other party’s representation. While I don’t have representation, the other party is represented by a manager in an unofficial manner. His deal, which is not in writing, is that he submits ideas and scripts to the manager who will then consider packaging it with the performers that he represents.”

**Craig:** Oh my god. He’ll consider it.

**Megana:** “Also, the talent would probably be considered C or D-list celebrities. Yes, I acknowledge that I’m no-list. No one with whom I want our new project tied. I think that this project that can potentially do better in terms of attracting talent. Overall the manager seems more like a booking agent then a rep for writers. My question is what are the legal complications of having one party in a partnership represented by a manager while the other party is not represented? Will the situation force the project to be handled through that manager? And could that manager act as a spoil sport that kills a deal that develops outside of his pipeline?

“In other words, just how messy could this get?”

**Phil:** I think that it could get very messy. But I think the answer is very clean and I’d be surprised if any of my friends disagreed, which is–

**Craig:** Margaret should do it. [laughs] She should jump in.

**Matt:** Go for it. Go for it.

**Phil:** It is that you’ve already correctly perceived the situation. You seem very clear-eyed about it. You know that this manager is not a good one and is not going to help. And will only in fact hurt. And I actually think the chances that this manager will not hurt are very slim. And so I think it’s in my – if this were me, I would either avoid the situation entirely, or I would make it very clear that this project cannot be represented by that person.

Now that person may still win their way into it, or create a static. And the last thing you need is static. And you really don’t need someone packaging a script with less than the very, very best. So, I guess my questions is if it is not something you absolutely have to pursue, which it kind of doesn’t sound like it from your framing, it’s best just to leave it be.

**Matt:** Unless the partner severs ties with the manager.

**John:** Yeah, that writer should not be with that manager.

**Craig:** No.

**John:** So get rid of that manager. But if that writer is not willing to get rid of that manager you should not be writing a project with them because they have bad judgment.

**Craig:** Total consensus.

**John:** As a general case though I’m curious about your thoughts when – this is something I’ve encountered once or twice – when I have an agent but I’m working with somebody who has a different agent or not an agent at any point, it does get kind of weird when one of the partnership and the other side doesn’t. Because it just becomes weird. Like are they representing both of you? Are they representing your side most? It is strange.

**Phil:** Yeah.

**John:** You guys have the same agents I assume? You and Matt have the same agents?

**Matt:** Oh yeah.

**Phil:** We’ve always had the same agents. But it’s interesting. We have – Karyn, her agent is at a different agency. Now over the years they’ve all learned to work extremely closely with one another, so it’s sort of like they all represent the three of us. But that is tough. Especially if you’re in the more starting out and you may not have representation and the other person does. There’s a power imbalance. That sense, from either side.

Or if you’re a writer that’s partnering with someone who has a massive quote and your quote is not massive. Who gets paid what? That’s really complicated stuff to deal with. And I think as in the theme that I think as always is even though it’s painful the only answer is to communicate extremely openly about it from moment one. And to try to get those expectations understood, not in an unspoken way, but in a spoken way.

**John:** That is a great segue to our last question. Megana, do you want to ask Kevin’s question here?

**Megana:** Great. So Kevin says, “I write with a partner on some projects and I’m wondering if we need a simple contract for those projects showing that we are co-writers. Someone expressed a hypothetical to me. What if my partner and I started developing an idea but the relationship has a falling out? What if my partner takes that idea and writes a script? I could be left without a path for compensation. How have you guys handled co-written projects?”

**John:** I would point people to some sort of screenwriter agreement before you get started. Basically something that lays out – we’ll put a link in the show notes to an example of it. But something that lays out like this is the project we’re trying to do together. This is how we’re going to split things if stuff is to be split. This is how we’re going to be credited with our ampersand and whose name goes first. The more you can do that stuff ahead of time in those initial discussions the better you’re going to be down the road.

**Matt:** I totally agree.

**John:** It’s the prenuptial agreement.

**Craig:** Prenup. Prenup.

**Phil:** And I think that I guess the good news and bad news of this is that if you have something that is written together – I guess this is talking maybe in the early, early stages that veers, but if you have something you’ve written together and you split up both people are holding a kill switch.

**Craig:** Correct.

**Phil:** Neither one of you can make it live on its own, but either one can kill it. Because nobody wants trouble. And the kind of trouble that is where someone in the partnership that wrote it is fighting the thing will guarantee nothing will happen.

**Craig:** Yeah, Kevin, when you’re dealing with the my partner and I are developing an idea, just write things down at the end of the meeting, or write them during the meeting. Take notes. Put them in outline form. Everything that’s written down in fixed form is copyrightable, assuming that it’s more than just what if babies had wings. But if you guys are going down, laying out a plot, and characters, just write it down. And now you’ve got something—

**Phil:** And email a summary of what you did that day to the person under the headline What We Did Today On This Project. That will do it.

**Matt:** I think those agreements are so helpful, especially when you’re starting out and you meet people and you don’t really know them that well and you get excited and you start to collaborate on something. Phil and I had like a very small project very early on that got held up by someone kind of trying to glom onto it. And the stakes ultimately were super low, but to us at the time they were super high.

**Phil:** Very wounding. The idea that this person could kind of kill a thing that we did because of conversations we’d had. You know, so.

**Matt:** And one of those agreements, even if it feels stupid to kind of over-codify something, I’m all for it.

**John:** Well you guys talked about putting the boundaries around what is the show, what is not the show. You’re putting boundaries around like, OK, this is the thing we’re working on together. So we can have discussions about other stuff, but this is the thing that our partnership is actually pursuing at this moment, and that feels so especially important right at the beginning of a relationship.

**Phil:** Definitely. Especially when you’re in a position in the business where you’re less established or you’re starting, or you’re kind of hustling and creating stuff. Like you feel much more vulnerable, for good reason, and thus all the more reason to hopefully take a couple of those worries off the table for yourself so you can focus.

**John:** Megana, thank you for these questions.

**Craig:** Thanks Megana.

**Megana:** Thank you. I love that this segment has just felt like general good dad advice.

**Craig:** Aw, well, you are dealing with four of them.

**Phil:** That’s our [unintelligible]. Thank you Megana.

**Craig:** That’s who we are. You know when you get four white men together you know what it’s called? A podcast. [laughs]

**Megana:** Thanks guys.

**Craig:** Thanks Megana.

**Phil:** Thank you.

**John:** It’s time for our One Cool Things. My One Cool Thing is called 50 Years of Text Games. It’s a sub-stack by Aaron Reed. And it’s really great. Sort of week by week he’s going through and looking at the text games of the last 50 years obvious, from Zork, to Hunt the Wumpus, Super Star Trek, and also the play by mail games, like the ones that pre-dated even sort of computers or BBSs.

It’s really fascinating and some stuff I knew, some stuff I didn’t know. But it was just great. And it’s not just interactive fiction but also kind of all the other strategy games that came up along the way. So it’s a sub-stack. It’s easy to subscribe to it if you’re curious. There’s some free issues you can look at, too, to see whether it’s something you’d like to read. So 50 Years of Text Games by Aaron Reed.

**Craig:** God, I love those. All the Infocom Games. So frustrating. So wonderful. My One Cool Thing is Miso Black Cod. You guys have had Miso Black Cod at a restaurant before. So delicious.

**John:** Delicious.

**Phil:** Oh, c’mon, delicious.

**Craig:** Sort of made famous by Chef Nobu. And I made it this past weekend and it turns out it’s incredibly easy to do. And kind of fool-proof. It’s pretty remarkable. The key for you at home who are like, oh my god, I can’t do it. Yes you absolutely can. The most important thing is to know what fish to get. It’s not actually cod. I think this is where everybody goes wrong. Black cod is just a nickname for a different fish called Sable fish.

What you want is a sable fish filet. And then the coating is just white miso. There’s like a specific miso called [Saikyo] miso which you’re probably not going to find here in the US or here in Canada, as where I am. You can get close to it by taking white miso or otherwise known as sweet miso which is not sweet, and then add a little sugar and add some mirin which is a kind of rice wine which is a different kind of rice wine. You mix it all together, coat it on the sable fish, broil it for 10 minutes. And oh my god it works.

**John:** Does it flake just like at Nobu?

**Matt:** Delicious. So good.

**Craig:** It works. It is so easy, it’s crazy. So, especially if you have kids who are like oh my god fish, no, it’s delicious and doable.

**John:** Craig and Matt and Phil, do you like monkfish?

**Matt:** I like monkfish.

**Craig:** Yeah. It’s not my favorite, but I don’t kick it out of bed.

**Phil:** I don’t think I ever eat it except for the liver to be perfectly honest.

**John:** Oh really? Monkfish I find it to be delicious fish. Really strange, fleshy. And so this black cod is reminding me sort of how I like some monkfish.

**Craig:** Well monkfish has a name problem. It’s got “onk.”

**John:** It does.

**Craig:** Which you’re like, uh, is it from a monkey?

**John:** But also you can look at the actual fish, it looks like an eel.

**Phil:** You sense it trolling the bottom of whatever water.

**Matt:** Craig, it does come from a monkey.

**Craig:** From a monkey. It’s monkey fish.

**John:** Matt, what have you got for us for One Cool Thing?

**Matt:** My One Cool Thing, during this pandemic I didn’t think I was going to get into puzzles and sourdough, but I did. And my One Cool Thing is Liberty Puzzles. They’re these–

**John:** They’re so good.

**Matt:** Oh my god, they’re so good. They’re these wooden puzzles. They’re a little expensive, or they can be, but they have these shapes, like each puzzle has shapes kind of that make sense with the subject matter. So like you’re doing this ocean scene and there’s a fisherman and there’s a boat.

**Craig:** Oh these are jigsaw puzzles.

**Matt:** It’s a jigsaw puzzle.

**John:** I was going to say, Craig hates jigsaw puzzles.

**Phil:** He doesn’t recognize jigsaw puzzles.

**Craig:** Yeah. I call them broken pictures.

**John:** Matt, you and I are right here. Aline Brosh McKenna is listening to this and fully agrees.

**Craig:** I know, but in my mind you are. I just turned you off in my head.

**Matt:** What happens is—

**Phil:** Pack your things and go home.

**Matt:** They’re so beautifully cut that as soon as you put one of the shapes in like a man, he just melts into the puzzle and goes away. And it’s this beautiful visual metaphor for a lot of things. And it feels somewhat emotional to do these puzzles.

**Craig:** I wish you could see my face.

**Matt:** I don’t care. Go eat your cod. Go eat your cod.

**Craig:** Broken pictures.

**John:** Let’s also celebrate because these are laser cut you open the box and it smells like a campfire which is fantastic.

**Matt:** Oh, it’s great.

**John:** It’s fantastic. It’s great. And you’ll look at these pieces like this could not possibly connect to any other piece and then it does. And it’s just amazing.

**Craig:** Oh god.

**John:** They’re also made in Boulder, Colorado, my hometown.

**Phil:** The tactile element of a jigsaw puzzle is wonderful, Craig, and that’s what it’s about. It’s the small victory.

**Craig:** It’s just repair. It’s a repair job.

**Matt:** What if I slather some mirin and miso on it?

**Craig:** Well, I mean, if I can eat it then it’s food, it has value.

**Matt:** And will you perk up?

**Craig:** Well it’s not a puzzle. I mean, at least we can agree on that. It’s just food at that point. I can’t tell you, I was so excited, Matt, and then it all went to hell.

**Matt:** Aw.

**Craig:** Goddamn.

**Phil:** Matt, if you hope to go through life never disappointing Craig, I’ve got news for you.

**Craig:** So far so good.

**Phil:** So don’t worry about it.

**Craig:** So far so good. But if you say jigsaw puzzle I’m going to hit the roof.

**Phil:** I have a One Cool Thing and I struggled because I believe every time I’ve ever been lucky enough to be on this show my One Cool Thing has had something to do with baseball. So I challenged myself to not do something about baseball this time. But I can gladly offer bonus baseball content if you want to.

And in fact I will, I’ll sneak it in really quickly. A woman named Justine Seigal who is on Twitter who runs an organization called Baseball for All which is dedicated to fostering girls and women playing baseball and staying in baseball at a very high level. It’s incredible.

**Craig:** Excellent. I love that.

**Phil:** Look it up.

**Matt:** Does she make jigsaw puzzles?

**Craig:** Why would she? She sounds awesome. [laughs] She doesn’t have time for that.

**Phil:** So my One Cool Thing is something happened that’s really remarkable, it’s a podcast. And there’s a guy named Jim Penola who did a podcast about our movie The Invitation called An Invitation to the Invitation. And I feel so honored and shocked by the existence of this thing, because it is a tremendously accomplished and in-depth kind of breakdown. And I mention it specifically here because he talks about the script a lot. It’s mainly sort of about the script and how it translates to the screen. And it’s also about how the movie speaks to him personally in terms of his life.

So, it’s just a really beautiful work of art on its own. And really well made. The music is beautiful. So, if you have any remote interest in this movie that we made, Jim has taken the analysis of it to a – it’s like one of those BFI movie guides that I love so much. So that is a really cool thing to me personally.

**Matt:** I agree.

**Phil:** And hopefully to others.

**Matt:** I agree. It’s cool.

**John:** Excellent.

**Craig:** Can’t make fun of it. I’ve got to respect it.

**Phil:** Sorry Craig.

**Matt:** How would you like to come on a podcast and be relentlessly abused?

**Craig:** I don’t think relentless. I think the abuse has been sort of–

**Matt:** Just a focused.

**Craig:** I would say you’ve been intermittently abused, which is fair.

**Phil:** Now, the one true cool thing that I can imagine is to someday get Matt to play Dungeons & Dragons with us.

**John:** That would be amazing.

**Phil:** That would be the coolest of things.

**John:** Now, Matt, to be fair a lot of Craig’s mockery of you happened before we started recording. So it’s not really on the podcast.

**Phil:** That’s right.

**John:** Phil and Matt, thank you so much for being on the show with us this week.

**Craig:** Thanks guys.

**Phil:** Such a pleasure.

**John:** Your new series debuts?

**Phil:** June 25th.

**John:** June 25th on Disney+. All over the world.

**Craig:** Mysterious Benedict Society.

**Phil:** Mysterious Benedict Society based on the novel by Trenton Lee Stewart. And we’re really proud of it and hope you check it out.

**John:** Cool. That is our show for this week. Scriptnotes is produced by Megana Rao. It is edited by Matthew Chilelli. Our outro is by Ryan Riley and it is so cute.

**Craig:** It is.

**John:** If you have an outro you can send us a link to ask@johnaugust.com. That’s also the place where you can send longer questions like the ones we answered today. For short questions on Twitter I’m @johnaugust. Phil Hay, are you on Twitter?

**Phil:** I am. @phillycarly.

**John:** And Matt Manfredi are you on Twitter?

**Matt:** I am. I’m @mattrm.

**John:** You may want to tweet at them to tell them how much you’re enjoying Mysterious Benedict Society or The Invitation.

We have t-shirts and they’re great. You can find them at Cotton Bureau. You can find the show notes for this episode and all episodes at johnaugust.com. That’s also where you find the transcripts and sign up for our weekly-ish newsletter called Inneresting which has lots of links to things about writing.

You can sign up to become a premium member at Scriptnotes.net where you get all the back episodes and the bonus segments like the one we’re about to record on shooting during a pandemic. Matt and Phil and Craig and Megana, thank you so much.

**Craig:** Yay.

**Matt:** I’ve got to say one thing and Craig is going to make fun of me.

**Craig:** Good.

**John:** Go.

**Matt:** My twitter handle I got wrong because I don’t ever look at it. It’s @mattrmanfredi. I’m so sorry.

**Craig:** Oh my god. You missed more than half of it. Wow.

**John:** Also you should follow Matt on Instagram because he takes photos of interesting trees.

**Phil:** Yeah, that’s growing in popularity wildly.

**Craig:** That I feel like was the most damning thing anyone said about you today.

**Matt:** Well the trees actually are beautiful.

**John:** Sometimes they’re also fire hydrants. So.

[Bonus segment]

**John:** All right. So you were all set to film the Mysterious Benedict Society. You were just weeks away from production and then a pandemic happened. So you ended up having to not shoot your show and then go back to start shooting it at the height of the pandemic. Talk to us about that decision.

**Phil:** Well, yeah, we were all ready to go. We were deep in preproduction. I think we were maybe 10 days from the start of shooting when that kind of week happened in mid-March where kind of Rudy Gobert had Covid and Hanks and everything started shutting down. And it was as everyone remembers such a chaotic time. And our first concern, we kind of knew, we saw the writing on the wall pretty quickly and our first concern was to get everybody home. We had a director from England. We had people from all over. The production was in Vancouver.

And then once that happened and we officially pushed we were like everybody else just waiting. And while we were waiting were kind of in all these conversations about developing protocols. What that would even look like, this unprecedented way of being and shooting. And our line producer, Grace Gilroy, who is sort of–

**Craig:** I love Grace.

**Phil:** You know Grace.

**Craig:** She’s the best.

**Phil:** If you meet Grace Gilroy, she’s the greatest.

**Matt:** She’s the reason we got this shot.

**Craig:** Just a little side note, Grace was the line producer on the Scary Movies that I did in Vancouver as well. And line producers will sometimes show up on set towards the end of the day if you’re going way over and they’re there to be like you’ve got to finish. And she would wear this very long coat. She’s a short woman. And she would wear this big, long winter coat that would go to the floor. And she walked very smoothly, so she floated. She would float into the stage and everybody was like oh boy we’re in trouble.

**Phil:** Exactly. We must wrap it up immediately.

**Craig:** She’s wonderful.

**Phil:** So she was kind of very instrumental in creating those protocols with the BC government. We knew one thing that we were going to have the most stringent protocols and if anyone could pull it off it would be our production. And so we started talking about during the summer sort of getting prepared to try to get people back up there and get going in September.

Remarkably, I mean, there were some very specific things that had to be different. Like normally of course we would have been up there for the pilot physically. Because of the 14 day quarantine coming into Canada, once you’re there you’re not flying back and forth. So we had to figure out what was going to be the best use of time. Our normal thing would be fly up there, fly back. It’s Vancouver. You can fly back three times a week if you need to. That wasn’t going to happen.

So, the biggest tangible for Matt and I was once production started we were on a monitor at our individual homes on Clearview Flex which is one of the several apps that allows you to do this, watching the feed from the monitors all day long. And we created some ideas of how to communicate with the directors. We would do a WhatsApp with the director, director’s assistant, script supervisor to do notes.

And in a strange way it allowed us to be on set for every take of every set up in this entire eight-episode run.

**Matt:** It worked really well. And for the first season of a show it was pretty invaluable to be present for kind of all of it.

**Phil:** Though we couldn’t be physically present, we were able to be mentally present for all of it.

**Matt:** Yeah. And what you don’t get in that is to kind of be with the actors, to be with them off set. Part of the job if everything is going well is just to let people know how well they’re doing. They don’t often get to hear it. And so to not be able to be there for both technical things and creative things, but also morale, it’s difficult. But this was kind of the best possible solution. And we did 95% of post remotely. Color. Sound. All of the editing.

**Phil:** And you kind of learn which parts of it kind of work pretty seamlessly and which parts of it are difficult. I mean, there was something amazing about being able to be watching the monitor between set ups, being in a production meeting for the next episode on Zoom, getting emails about costumes and locations and etc. and being able to handle all that at once in a way that, you know, when I’m physically on a set, which is a place I truly love to be, one of my favorite places in the world, I’m not one of those people that can pull out the laptop and work on something else, or do a little rewrite on the next script coming in. I just can’t. I just have to be and be there.

And so this let me kind of do all that. And as Matt said the intangibles are what we missed, too. And for the actors, shooting in a pandemic, I know for our show everyone was so committed to each other’s safety that the actors were not – they’re not out having fun on the weekends. It’s a very lonely thing to be an actor and be without your family, alone in another city period. But for Tony, Tony Hale who is the star of the show, he’s just living a monk-like existence. Working, coming back, working, coming back.

So we started figuring out, oh, we really need to schedule things with him. So we would have Zoom drinks regularly. We’d have a check-in to make sure right before shooting to go through the script page by page and walk through every single line with him and make sure everything was cool. So, those intangibles are what you miss and is a lot of the fun of making movies and television. But in the editing room, for example, I thought it was very—

**Matt:** I loved it.

**Phil:** Seamless and smooth to be on a Zoom editing session. Whereas Karyn for example is like, “Oh, the second I can get back physically in the editing room I want to be. I don’t like the virtual thing.” So everyone has a different vibe with it.

**John:** So what things will you try to take from this – was forced upon you the first season, would you try to take with you into a second season if there is a second season for your show?

**Phil:** Personally, I would say definitely we will spend time on the set for sure. Because I did miss that. I did miss the physically being there. But the lessons, number one I think a lesson a lot of people are taking is shorter days are good. We were kind of forced into shorter days because of the pandemic and also because we have a lot of kids in the cast. But I found it to be very clarifying. I’ve always believed that and Karyn on our movies is adamant about working humane days. It’s just a bedrock.

You can do it. And you can get it done. And I now see shows by necessity operating in this way and I think I’d like it to be a thing that the industry carries forward. That 10-hour days is not a bad thing. If you do it right and you approach it aggressively in what you get done in that time that that would be something I’d love to see carry forward.

**Matt:** It was kind of funny, before we got shut down and it was unsure, I was going to bed and I was like what about last looks. There’s no way we’re not shutting down. I mean, there’s certain practices that I think in terms of like masks and face shields that are just going to be carried forward, so it’s just not a given that everyone on set is going to get the flu.

But I would say some of the remote stuff for post, at least to my mind, saved us a lot of time and allowed us to multitask in a way that I found incredibly valuable. So if some of that stayed I wouldn’t be so sad.

**Phil:** Yeah. And you see the different ways. Like remote mixing to me wasn’t great. And when we were able for the last couple to go back and mix on a stage as we were supposed to—

**Matt:** How it sounds on headphones can be inaccurate.

**John:** So, Craig, you hearing this, does it give you any thoughts about what you want to do for your show? Because they were able to do their Canadian show without ever being there, and you’re there right now. What’s the mix for you?

**Craig:** Well I’m a little bit more like Karyn, I think. I’m very much – I like being in the space. I like being connected as best I can. For Chernobyl I did do quite a bit of remote editing only because for budget purposes all of our post was in London and there was only so much time I could spend there. It seemed like if I could edit remotely and stay with the family then that probably made sense.

But right now we are going through – we’re in late Covid, it’s not early Covid. So there are a ton of practices that are generally accepted and being used. We wear masks. I get tested three times a week. We all do. Every morning I have to go through the Kabuki of telling an app on my phone that I’m not sick and then they scan a code.

And this is what we do. And for good reason. However, while things were very, very bad here in Calgary just a month ago, they’ve improved dramatically since the vaccination rate up here is excellent. So, it is my great hope that as we proceed through production things are going to ease up and in fact because our production is so lengthy I suspect that at some point it will be almost like it used to be. That’s kind of where it’s going and that’s what I hope we are able to get to.

So, you know, we follow the rules. They are a little frustrating at times but they’re there for good reason. And the last thing we want to have is for someone – forget shutting down or any of that. I just don’t want anyone to get sick. I don’t want anybody to – and certainly I don’t want anybody to get dangerously ill – but I don’t even want anybody to get slightly ill. So, hopefully it goes smoothly.

**Matt:** And I think as we hopefully get back to normal I think the remote viewing is going to be a continued conversation with the DGA because it was something that had to be negotiated for the feed to leave set.

**Phil:** And the key is who that feed can go to, right? So in our case the feed could explicitly not go to the studio or network. So that actually is a bit freeing in some ways. Because if no one is on set–

**John:** Well, talk to me about that because you can always look at what the cameras are seeing you had a sense of what was being filmed at all times. So you didn’t have to watch dailies because you actually just watched it for real.

**Matt:** Right. And I think it’s so much more valuable than watching dailies, you know, because you can correct. If you have a location for one day and you watch the dailies the next day and you didn’t get it, the way it worked out especially with Covid, like we couldn’t go back.

**Phil:** And again not everyone is like this, but for me personally unless there’s some incredibly compelling reason I can’t, I am on set for every single take that is shot of that movie. Because to me – and I’m not doing other stuff.

**John:** You can’t split your time when you’re on set. It’s really hard to work on other stuff.

**Phil:** Totally. And it’s experiential. It’s not just watching and listening. It’s feeling it. And so I rarely have to watch dailies because I’ve already absorbed it in a very deep way. And so in a strange way so for a movie you can – for me at least you can always do that. The TV show, what’s so interesting is in a normal situation – I mean, every TV show is different – but a lot of times it would be like had the Covid never happened I would imagine Matt and I would have flown up to Vancouver. We would have been on set for the first two episodes. Then we would have flown back and then someone else, in television a lot of times the writer of the episode will go up there and be the voice of the writers for that episode. All those different customs.

**John:** A supervising director who sort of overseas how it works.

**Phil:** Totally. And for me it’s hard for me to envision that, because I want to see everything. It’s hard for me to be like I wonder what’s going on up there. So, if I can’t physically live there for five months then it is really helpful to have that feed and to be able to be like feeling the being there. Now there’s things that happened with our supervising director that can’t happen from the feed. But it’s interesting. In a weird way it’s a way to stay completely and immediately connected when the timeframe is too long for you to be able to just be there.

**Matt:** Yeah.

**John:** Craig, so good to talk with you. Matt, so good to talk with you. And Phil.

**Phil:** That was great.

**Craig:** See you guys. Thanks guys.

**Matt:** Thanks guys.

**Phil:** Bye.

**Craig:** Bye.

Links:

* [MoviePass](https://www.nytimes.com/2021/06/08/business/moviepass-settlement-ftc.html) for the NYT by Daniel Victor
* Blitzcalling: [Kevin Roose for NY Times on “The Millennial Lifestyle Subsidy”](https://www.nytimes.com/2021/06/08/technology/farewell-millennial-lifestyle-subsidy.html?referringSource=articleShare)
* [The Mysterious Benedict Society](https://www.disneyplus.com/series/the-mysterious-benedict-society/5HfolGRtUHpv)
* [Mythic Quest](https://www.imdb.com/title/tt8879940/), check out [Backstory! Season 2, Episode 6](https://www.imdb.com/title/tt14596556/?ref_=nm_flmg_wr_5) for a special guest star!
* [Why Netflix Cancels Shows](https://www.ign.com/articles/heres-why-netflix-cancels-shows-so-quickly-now)
* [WGA Writer’s Collaboration Agreement](https://www.wga.org/uploadedFiles/contracts/other-contracts/collaboration.pdf)
* [50 Years of Text Games](https://if50.substack.com/archive?sort=new)
* [Miso Black Cod](https://www.thekitchn.com/recipe-nobu-miso-marinated-black-cod-117238)
* [Liberty Puzzles](https://www.libertypuzzles.com/)
* [Justine Seigal and Baseball for All](https://baseballforall.com/our-founder-justine-siegal/)
* [An Invitation to the Invitation](https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/an-invitation-to-the-invitation/id1533306426)
* [Phil Hay](https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0006534/) on [Twitter](https://twitter.com/phillycarly?lang=en)
* [Matt Manfredi](https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0542062/) on [Twitter](https://twitter.com/mattrmanfredi?lang=en)
* [Get a Scriptnotes T-shirt!](https://cottonbureau.com/people/scriptnotes-podcast)
* [Gift a Scriptnotes Subscription](https://scriptnotes.supportingcast.fm/gifts) or [treat yourself to a premium subscription!](https://scriptnotes.supportingcast.fm/)
* [John August](https://twitter.com/johnaugust) on Twitter
* [Craig Mazin](https://twitter.com/clmazin) on Twitter
* [John on Instagram](https://www.instagram.com/johnaugust/?hl=en)
* [Outro](http://johnaugust.com/2013/scriptnotes-the-outros) by Ryan Riley ([send us yours!](http://johnaugust.com/2014/outros-needed))
* Scriptnotes is produced by [Megana Rao](https://twitter.com/MeganaRao) and edited by [Matthew Chilelli](https://twitter.com/machelli).

Email us at ask@johnaugust.com

You can download the episode [here](http://traffic.libsyn.com/scriptnotes/505standard.mp3).

Scriptnotes, Episode 500: The Quincenterary, Transcript

May 26, 2021 Scriptnotes Transcript

The original post for this episode can now be found [here](https://johnaugust.com/2021/the-quincenterary).

**John August:** Hello and welcome. My name is John August.

**Craig Mazin:** My name is Craig Mazin.

**John:** And this is Episode 500 of Scriptnotes, a podcast about screenwriting and things that are interesting to screenwriters. Today on the show we’ll revisit what we learned in our first 499 episodes with some of the folks who know it best. We welcome back Scriptnotes producers Stuart Friedel, Godwin Jabangwe, and Megan McDonnell, along with longtime editor Matthew Chilelli, and our current producer, Megana Rao.

We’re going to be enlisting them to help answer listener questions, plus we’ll play a game with two Scriptnotes super fans. Craig, you love games.

**Craig:** And I love Scriptnotes super fans. Are there are only two Scriptnotes super fans? Or did we select them from a number of Scriptnotes super fans?

**John:** I put out a call on Twitter asking for like who has listened to every episode of Scriptnotes. And these are people who raised their hands and said like they listened to every episode of Scriptnotes, so we will see if they were listening carefully.

**Craig:** These are the most damaged of our fans.

**John:** And in our bonus segment for premium members we’re going to turn the tables and our producers will ask Craig and I if we remember a damn thing about what we said over these 500 episodes.

**Craig:** I mean, the answer is no. I’m just going to tell you right now. It’s no. I mean, well we’ll see how we do. I’m just so happy to see all of these – so we’re looking at them on Zoom. We can see their fresh faces. It’s nice. I saw a very tiny mini Friedel walk by. That was wonderful to see. And I’m also, obviously I’m happy to see Megan and always happy to see Matthew. But particularly happy to see Megana today because there was a weird Twitter rumor that she was just leaving. And I don’t know if they meant leaving the show, or leaving the world. Did you see that Megana?

**Megana Rao:** Oh my god.

**Craig:** Yeah. Like on Twitter. Someone was like, oh, it was like what will happen in the 500th episode? And one of the choices was Megana Rao leaves. And then, you know, it’s Twitter. That’s all they needed. And they were off and running.

**Megana:** I’m going to be here for 500 more. Sorry Twitter.

**Craig:** Oh yeah.

**John:** So Stuart Friedel has our longest history. He has over 200 episodes of produced Scriptnotes. So Megana has been doing it for a good long time, but she’s got a lot of runway ahead of her if she wants to beat that. But I think the reason there could have been speculation on Twitter is because we had promised that there was going to be a big announcement in today’s show, and so we should get to the big announcement, the big news. Because for nearly 10 years Scriptnotes has only been a podcast that Craig doesn’t listen to.

**Craig:** Correct.

**John:** And soon Scriptnotes will be a book that Craig won’t read.

**Craig:** Right. Right. And this is wonderful. Like all of the ideas that we have on the show, I didn’t have this idea. I like to say we had ideas because technically we had them. If I and you together have ideas, and you come up with all the ideas, we had ideas. This book is one of them.

**John:** There’s been talk of doing a Scriptnotes book for a long time and we ended up doing a Scriptnotes Listener’s Guide a while back just because it was a way to sort of get that out there. We have transcripts going all the way back to the very start of the show, but we looked at sort of like well what if we were to just bind the transcripts and it would be like 100 volumes. There’s like no good way to do this.

**Craig:** Oh, I think we should have gone that way actually. I think we should have done a full 100.

**John:** Just take up a whole library. It should just be Scriptnotes.

**Craig:** Yeah. Scriptnotes Volume 78.

**John:** You pull that out and flip through it. Little codecs.

**Craig:** And I want it to look like those books that Gandalf was looking through when he was trying to figure out if the one ring was really the one ring.

**John:** Mm-hmm. Or the Game of Thrones libraries where the books are all chained up. That’s another way we could do it. You have to go to a place to get to the Scriptnotes information.

**Craig:** The Citadel, obviously.

**John:** The Citadel. So instead we are going to have a book that is properly edited. So Chris Sont who does our weekly-ish newsletter called Inneresting is doing the editing on the book. It’s going to have interviews with many of the fantastic guests we’ve had on the show. Plus sort of the best of on different topics, nicely condensed and compressed. So it will still be me and Craig talking but sort of an optimized version of us talking about all the things we talked about over these 499 episodes.

**Craig:** This is our 500th episode.

**John:** And I did not predict we’d get to here.

**Craig:** No, well first of all there was a while there where I didn’t think anyone was going to get to here. So, things are a little more stable out there in the world. But 500 episodes, it’s not quite 10 years of Scriptnotes, but it’s freaking close.

**John:** We’re getting close. Yeah. So we made a list of our previous Scriptnotes guests and there were so many here and Megana this afternoon was like, “Oh, what about Ice Cube?” I forgot there’s a bonus episode with Ice Cube that hadn’t made it onto the list. So, Craig, let’s quickly run through who our guests have been, because there were surprises here for me as well.

**Craig:** Oh, in terms of who we’ve had in the past?

**John:** Yeah. All right, so just in the Bs we have Jason Bateman, Noah Baumbach, David Benioff, Alec Berg, Rachel Bloom.

**Craig:** OK, then we have one C. Ice Cube. Which I don’t know if that – I guess Cube is the last name there. But we have Ben Falcone, Kevin Feige of Marvel, and we also have Dana Fox.

**John:** Greta Gerwig, David Goyer, Mari Heller, Lisa Joy, Mindy Kaling, Lawrence Kasdan.

**Craig:** I mean, that’s pretty good. Continuing with our final K, David Koepp. Lawrence Kasdan to David Koepp is strong. And then it goes to Jennifer Lee, very strong. We also have Natasha Leggero, Damon Lindelof, Riki Lindhome, Phil Lord.

**John:** Yeah. Julia Louis-Dreyfus was here in our little recording studio.

**Craig:** How about that? That was pretty awesome.

**John:** Kelly Marcel, a frequent guest. Of course she moved to England. Christopher Markus. Melissa McCarthy. Rob McElhenney.

**Craig:** Stephen McFeely, Aline Brosh McKenna, Chris McQuarrie. Just the MCs alone is impressive. Chris Miller. Chris Nee. Ashley Nicole Black.

**John:** Jonathan Nolan. BJ Novak. Ryan Reynolds was on the show.

**Craig:** Ryan Reynolds.

**John:** Dailyn Rodriguez. Seth Rogan. Dan Savage. Do you remember we did a Dan Savage episode?

**Craig:** The Dirty Episode. Of course.

**John:** Yeah.

**Craig:** And then finishing off we had Justin Simien, Malcolm Spellman, Rawson Marshall Thurber. David Wain. Phoebe Waller-Bridge. Dan Weiss. And Rebel Wilson.

**John:** And that’s not all the guests. That’s just sort of the big names we’ve talked to over these–

**Craig:** Those are the ones we liked.

**John:** Those are the ones we liked.

**Craig:** No, we liked them all.

**John:** We liked all of them. But we’ve had a lot of other people come through here and share what they knew. So I’m excited to make a book. If you want more information about the book go to Scriptnotes.net. Basically all that you will see there is a little place for a mailing list, because we send you sample chapters/information about it.

We’re not quite sure how we’re doing it. We’d love the book to come out in 2022. We could go through a normal publisher. We could publish it ourselves. We’ll see what makes the most sense. But people have asked for the book for a while now and we’re going to try to do it.

**Craig:** I’m excited. I think this will be the hottest Christmas item of 2022.

**John:** Yeah.

**Craig:** 2022.

**John:** 2022.

**Craig:** 2022.

**John:** A safe bet for 2022.

**Craig:** Yeah.

**John:** All right. So usually on this program we answer listener questions. And so our producers go through the questions and pull them and put them in the outline and we answer those questions. Today I want to flip those a bit. These are still listener questions, but you and I will ask the questions kind of of our producers. Because these are folks who are out there working in the industry and may actually know things that we don’t know about these things.

**Craig:** Mm-hmm.

**John:** Let’s start with a question from Sarah. Sarah writes in, “I had a question for you all about how you met and started the podcast. You sort of addressed it in a season one episode where you basically explained that you weren’t friends beforehand, but you didn’t say much else. If you covered this in a later episode I will find out soon enough, but if you did not I’d love to hear more about how this partnership came to be and how your friendship has evolved over the years.”

So, Stuart Friedel was the very first Scriptnotes producer. He was working as my assistant. Stuart, what can you tell us about the early days of Scriptnotes?

**Stuart Friedel:** About how you and Craig met?

**John:** Or just what Scriptnotes was like. Because Scriptnotes was I think just kind of a “hey I think I’m going to do a podcast” idea. I kind of remember having the notion of doing it. And, here Stuart, do this work. So talk to us about what the early episodes felt like.

**Stuart:** I mean, you pretty much nailed it. I remember I joined, and within maybe two or three weeks of me starting you had this idea. It may have even been like an inkling of a notion before I joined. But pretty much right away.

If you look at the number of episodes per week you can break that down and that’s almost exactly the amount of time that I worked for you. And so Craig had a blog that was not quite as active as yours.

**Craig:** Right.

**Stuart:** By the time you were talking to me about it you already knew that Craig was going to be your partner on it. I remember like drilling a hole in your desk so that we could install this microphone arm. And going to some weird, the sort of electronics shop that doesn’t exist anymore.

**Craig:** Fry’s.

**Stuart:** To get windscreens and get microphones and figure all that out.

**John:** Or Amitron.

**Stuart:** But if you listen to the early episodes, I mean, I edited them to start and you can really tell the jump in quality when Matthew joined. And also frankly if you look at episode length they started at 20 minutes and I think they pretty quickly got up to about where they are now. I think that you guys really – it became second nature pretty quickly, but there certainly is an early batch of episodes where you’re not quite the well-oiled machine yet.

And then from there, I mean, in some ways the bulk of my job for the next bunch of years was getting Scriptnotes at first edited, but then just everything in place for Matthew to do his work. Getting everything in place to upload it to the blog. And over the years it really evolved about how it went onto the blog and what the blog looked like. And that’s all technical stuff. Yeah, you had a pretty good handle on it.

**John:** So Matthew, let’s segue over to you. Because you took over the editing reins from originally me and then Stuart and sort of just did a much better job of it. You came to Scriptnotes kind of in a weird way, because you just started writing outros for it. So when did you find out about Scriptnotes and when did you start deciding to become more involved?

**Matthew Chilelli:** I found out about Scriptnotes through your blog. It was something where I went to school at Ithaca people would talk about you’ve got to check this out. It’s just a really easy way to find a quick answer if you’re trying to write a screenplay or if you have some question about moviemaking. And then I started listening to the show. And when you asked for outros somewhere around Episode 98 or so I was I guess first through the gate. And that I think was our introduction was through music, not through editing.

**John:** I was trying to figure it out today. I think you took over editing on Episode 152. It’s the first one I see you credited as the editor. And weirdly the job of producer and editor are kind of fungible in podcast land. So when you hear credits on a lot of podcasts you won’t hear as editor as a description because it will say produced by and that person actually was cutting the audio. Really we tried to keep it very separate here. So our producers are sort of organizing the show and getting all the material together, but you are the person who is fixing all of my mistakes and making it sound good.

**Matthew:** Yeah. And there were fewer and fewer of them as time goes on. I think you’ve both gotten very good at editing yourselves.

**Craig:** Yeah, you know, try and not stick you with too much trouble when we mess up. But am I allowed – can I answer the question also a little bit?

**John:** Please, please.

**Craig:** Just to get a little sappy for a second. Because Sarah is asking how our partnership came to be. Just because John called and said do you want to do this and I was like D’OK. Because I didn’t want to write a blog anymore. But when you ask how our friendship has evolved over the years, you’ve kind of all heard it. This is it.

This is how we became friends. It’s not like we were friends-friends when we started. We were really just like podcast partners. I don’t know how else to put that, you know. And we got to know each other through doing the show. We got to understand each other through doing the show. And we became friends by doing the show. And I really do believe that – if I may use the word “love” if I may – that love is a function of time and commitment.

And John and I are both married people, so we obviously get the value of commitment and time. And that’s I think what you hopefully have heard over almost 10 years is the function of time and commitment to each other. So, in a way John this is like our anniversary.

**John:** Yeah, it is like our anniversary. We were acquaintances beforehand. And we were friendly beforehand, but we weren’t really friends. And I remember on some episode I said, some early episode, we can find the transcripts, I said like, “Well, it’s not like we’re friends off mic.” I said something like that. I could hear your heart breaking there a little bit.

**Craig:** Oh, oh, I see.

**John:** It was a mean thing for me to say.

**Craig:** Well…

**John:** But also we’ve become better friends because we play Dungeons & Dragons. We do things that are not the podcast now, too, in ways we didn’t before. We were just two guys who did the podcast before.

**Craig:** Exactly. And I think we trust each other. When you do a show like this there’s a certain amount of trust that happens. You rely on each other and you trust each other. And that trust over time is rewarded. Sometimes with people you trust them and over time it’s punished. And that’s how you know things are bad. Your trust was punished. And that has not happened. So it’s been just a very, I mean, for me it’s been incredibly easy.

Obviously I don’t get paid. Everyone knows that. That I’m being ripped off on the daily. But, it’s very easy for me to just show up. I don’t have to do anything. You do everything. It’s so nice. It’s so nice. It’s worth the money I lose. Now I’m saying that I’m losing money, by the way.

**John:** Like it’s costing you. Although, it did cost you in the early days because originally we were actually hosting the files on Amazon.

**Craig:** Yeah.

**John:** And it was costing us like $200 or $300 a month, just the storage fees for it.

**Craig:** Yeah. But it was a nice expense because it meant people were listening. By the way, how many people listen now? Every now and then I’ll ask you. This is how clueless I am. Where are we at?

**John:** Megana, what’s our weekly listenership right now?

**Megana:** I would say weekly we have about 30,000 listeners.

**Craig:** Wow.

**John:** And our premiums are in the 3000s now.

**Craig:** Every time I hear a number I just say wow. It doesn’t matter what it is. Honestly, if it were 12 people. You hear like 12 people listen every week I would be like wow.

**John:** I will say that it’s great to see the total numbers, but when somebody who I really respect in the industry says they listen to the show that’s incredibly gratifying to me as well. When you find out you have some fans out there.

**Craig:** It certainly is well listened to here in town. And I don’t mean Calgary.

**John:** All right. Let’s go onto Brett in Los Angeles. He writes, “Your podcast really helped me after Covid destroyed my industry and I had to take a mind-numbing overnight job to pay the mortgage. Now I’m considering moving away from Los Angeles because it is just too difficult to stay afloat here with a house and a pregnant wife, while also chasing the dream of being a working writer. So my question is pre-Covid you guys have discussed the difficulties of living outside Los Angeles. But now with Zoom has that changed? What about writer rooms? Would it be impossible to be staffed if I were in Dallas or Nashville?

“I don’t have a lot of traction now, so maybe it’s a moot point. Still, I believe in my work and I worry there might never be traction if I leave.”

So, Megan and Stuart, you guys have both done a lot of work this last year on Zoom. Stuart, you’ve been in writer’s rooms. Megan, I think your WandaVision experience was mostly pre-lockdown. But what do you think about Brett’s situation and how viable would it be for Brett to be working mostly remotely? Megan, we’ll start with you. What do you think?

**Megan McDonnell:** I think definitely while writer’s rooms are still over Zoom I don’t see why not. I feel – and like meetings and stuff. I feel like the trick about living in LA is just making friends in LA and that’s such a big part of how you hear about stuff. I want to believe that it’s becoming more inclusive as far as where you can be living and find your way in. But I just don’t know. What do you think, Stuart?

**Stuart:** Yeah. I mean, we have no idea what the – first of all, how long this tail is going to be, the end of Covid, and second of all what things are going to look like as we get out, come out the other side even. But I am currently in a writer’s room with six people. Two of those people left LA when lockdown started and as far as I know don’t have plans to come back any time soon. I don’t know how right that is.

But I also know that as our show in general moves back into an office the writer’s room is the last and least urgent group to move back into an office. I think we’re probably going to stay on Zoom for the foreseeable future. I don’t see why we wouldn’t. It works really well for us.

I don’t know that it works really well for every writer’s room. I’ve heard friends that really don’t like it and they’re eager to get back into in-person in LA. So I think there’s just so many moving parts. But I think you hit the nail on the head that it’s more about getting the jobs. And it helps to be in those social circles, in those conversations in LA. Also though just being relevant and being seen like in offices. I think you make such a stronger impression when you shake somebody’s hand than you do over Zoom. And I’m kind of eager to get back into that.

I can’t say for a fact that it’s impossible, because it currently is possible. I just don’t know if any of my friends who have moved away would have gotten the jobs that they can do from far away if they weren’t in LA when they got the job in the first place.

**John:** Now, Megan, I know you’ve been pitching on some projects during Zoom and having to do that. How do you like that versus doing it in person? Congratulations on your Marvel movie which is about to start shooting. When you got that that was an in-person situation. But the stuff since then has been a lot of sort of Zoom stuff. And how are you finding the difference? Are you able to land those jobs doing it on Zoom?

**Megan:** Great question. I have not thought about not getting jobs because of Zoom. [laughs] I think that it’s nice to be in person because it’s easier to communicate excitement in person. I feel like that’s half the battle of pitching is this idea is so exciting, don’t you think? And they’re like, wow, I guess it is. I don’t know. I haven’t minded the Zoom stuff. It feels more casual or something. There’s something nice about it.

But I do think in-person is helpful, too, if you have a complicated idea that requires a lot of like – I pitched something that involved a lot of like John’s artboards. He does these boards when he’s pitching, and so I stole that. And did a lot of acting with the boards and with pieces and stuff. And if it’s like a visual thing I feel like, I don’t know, people do it over Zoom, too. I don’t know.

**John:** Yeah. I’ve been able to do it on Zoom, too. I think you’re right in the sense of like when you’re in those meetings when you have to get a sense of like are they really getting it, are they responding? Is this the right vibe? Or should I throw everything else out? That’s really hard to gauge on Zoom. But those initial meetings or just like “hey how are you,” happy not to do it. We said this on the podcast a bunch of times. If I never have to drive to Santa Monica in the afternoon I’ll be just delighted.

**Craig:** Seriously.

**John:** It’s a beast.

**Stuart:** Takes away your podcast commute time where you can really listen. I do think like assuming there is a concrete number of jobs, which I don’t think is a fair assumption, but it’s the same advantage and disadvantage as everybody else has. I have found though that anecdotally it seems like people expect a deck.

Decks I think were rising in popularity, like PowerPoint presentations precipitously even before this, but now it seems like everybody seems to want that or be doing that. So, I’ve kind of gone the opposite and for the pitch I’m doing now I have tactile maps and props and I start just looking at you and then throughout my pitch I turn my camera and there’s a map on the wall. I don’t know whether that’s been good for me or not, but at the end of the day it feels a little bit like more and more the job of a screenwriter strains towards you also have to be a PowerPoint maker and you also have to be a song and a dancer. And I think Zoom has made that even more so the case. So I’m eager to get back in a room.

**John:** Cool. Emily in Los Angeles wrote, “I recently brought a script to a new writer’s group I joined and it got decimated. This was the first time this group had seen any of my writing and we spent about two hours going through each scene and pretty much talking about all the reasons it sucked. I’m always open to criticism and have received constructive feedback on the script from other writing groups I’m in. But at the two-hour mark my feelings were hurt. The notes didn’t feel constructive or actionable. They felt mean-spirited and based on personal preference.

“I took a break from the script and have recently come back to it, but I can’t get their notes out of my head. Now I’m doubting every scene and choice I’ve made. It’s making me want to abandon this script forever. How do I get these notes I disagree with out of my head and get back to writing the movie I want to make?”

So Megan and Megana, you guys have the most experience of anyone on this call in writers groups and sort of like groups of writers who are coming together voluntarily to talk over their work. So first let me start with it sounded like something went wrong with this writers group. What you diagnose what’s happening here? Megana, why don’t we start with you – what’s your reaction to what Emily is experiencing?

**Megana:** It kind of sounds like maybe there was somebody who had a bad vibe and everybody jumped on. And maybe the negativity was infectious. Something that I’ve learned through writers groups is I think they should be like your midwives of your story, like very supportive and coaching you along the way. And I’m very lucky to have that in my writers groups which have included Megan who is awesome.

I think the other thing is like whenever I get really just harsh, horrible feedback I usually come to the conclusion weeks later that the person is actually just not the right audience for this material. And I’ve also found that it’s usually coming from someplace of insecurity.

For Emily I would advise you like this is not about you, or your script. It sounds like this is a weird group dynamic thing and maybe you should find a new writers group.

**Craig:** Mmm.

**John:** Megan, if this were happening in a group that you were leading would you have tried to – is there a way to sort of stop that from happening? Is there a way to head that off with the pass?

**Megan:** I agree that sometimes it can get negative. And it’s easy to just find good things about it to say, even if it’s just to like recalibrate the tone of the room. You can always find something cool that’s working, or that’s good, or that is interesting. Or ask questions. Like, wow, this choice, this is a choice. What was that about? And then that can be helpful.

I think for being a writers group participant I think part of it is also so much like, OK, what is this writer going for and how do I help them get there instead of how do I make this the script that I would have written.

**Craig:** I have umbrage. I have so much umbrage over this.

**John:** Craig, go for it.

**Craig:** I think that Megan and Megana are showing how lovely they are, and just how instinctively nice and empathetic they are. But I am instinctively not. And I think that regardless of what Emily wrote, maybe what Emily wrote was bad. It happens. Sometimes you write bad things. But two hours of kicking around something like that? Two hours? That’s toxic.

And that point I worry about the writers group dynamic where everybody is just using feedback to puff themselves up. They’re just kicking somebody because they feel important. It makes them feel like they’re in the business or something. I don’t know what it is.

I went to one writers group once, many, many, many, many years ago. And I left and thought I will never, ever, ever go back to that group again because it just felt like somehow this group had organized itself into like, you know, there’s like the alpha personality that is like everyone just agrees that person is the best. Like in acting classes everyone just knows that person is the best. They’re not. They’re not the best. They’re just the most whatever. You know?

So, Emily, I would say if you’re in a writing group and they spent two hours going through every scene and talking about all the reasons it sucks that’s not a good writing group. That’s not a writing group. I don’t really know what the point is.

It’s hard to write things. And the fact that you felt like you’re doubting every scene and choice you made, of course you are. I would. I don’t think I would be able to come back to that script. I would feel so bad. We are emotional creatures and to be damaged like that for two – you say at the two-hour mark my feelings were hurt and I’m almost like at the two-minute mark I’m sure your feelings were hurt.

I mean, for two hours? What’s wrong with those people? How could the notes be constructive or actionable after two hours? I would run. I would run from that group.

**John:** Now, do you guys have any suggestions for, like ground rules for a writers group. Do you guys talk at the outset like this is how we’re going to do things? I see some nodding there. So Megana what are some ground rules you’d like to have?

**Megana:** Sure. When we first start meeting with a writers group I feel like we talk about how we’re doing it for fun and to encourage each other. And just constructive feedback. So if there’s something you disagree with, like Megan said, asking questions, bringing it up as this is a choice that you made, where were you going with this, so that you can give them the benefit of the doubt if something is not working for you.

But we try pretty hard to just set some ground rules that negativity or criticism that is not actionable, please do not bring that into the writers group.

**Craig:** Yeah.

**John:** Yeah.

**Megana:** I really appreciate when people, because you guys said it in the notes meeting with execs that you don’t really like pitches, but I love whenever somebody is giving me a note if they just pitch, so I get a better sense of what they’re talking about. I feel like it helps me get momentum.

**Craig:** Well it’s certainly better than just kicking something for two hours. Sometimes when I read things I really only have a negative criticism. And the negative criticism is “this is bad.” You know, now I can dress up bad nicely by saying, “It just feels like none of the characters seem real to me. The dialogue isn’t feeling real and it’s not quite sounding like the way people talk.” That takes ten seconds. What is the point of going on and on about it? That’s the part that I don’t understand.

I don’t recognize the value of that at all.

**Megana:** Two hours seems ludicrous to be spending on one person’s script.

**Megan:** Yeah. In any case, like that’s so long to be talking about one person in the group’s script.

**Craig:** It’s long to be talking about anything. You know? It’s so hard to talk about anything for two hours, but much less – and you know the person is sitting there and you’re like everybody – somebody had to get up and pee and come back and continue criticizing her. That’s too long.

**John:** It is.

**Megan:** I also can see, sometimes if that’s the case where maybe you don’t like a script and maybe it’s just generally not appreciated in the group, then sometimes you can be like, OK, pitch us the idea and then you can kind of get a sense of like, OK, what is exciting to you about this script? And that can be helpful in reframing what notes you give.

**Stuart:** Yeah, if you have two hours of micro notes then you should be giving five minutes of macro notes.

**Craig:** Correct. And you can’t have two hours of micro notes. You can’t. You can’t. It’s outrageous.

**John:** Yeah. If you’re producing this movie and it’s going into production and you have to sort of do it last thing. I imagine you’ve had two-hour meetings with Lindsay Doran.

**Craig:** I’ve had two-hour meetings with Lindsay Doran about two pages.

**John:** Yes.

**Craig:** But they were these conversations that were predicated on the fact that she was happy. And I was happy. And so the question wasn’t why is this bad. The question was well what if, or OK, here’s a thought. And so it was creative and constructive in the best way. But, OK, now here’s the problem with this scene. Because you know every time they turn the page she was like, “OK, we got over that.” And then they’re like, “OK, now let’s start why we hate this new season. And it’s like, “Oh god.”

And it never stopped. I just want to hug Emily and buy her lunch.

**John:** Craig, do you want to ask the question here from Austin?

**Craig:** Here we go. Austin asks, or says, “I had a realization about myself and my writing the other day. I don’t write the people in my life into my work. I realized this the other day after having a disagreement with a friend. I was angry with the person and I began to really analyze why I thought they were acting the way they were. In that moment of analysis I realized that even though I’m an observant person I’m never endeavored to use the people closest to me, even people I dislike, as characters in fiction. I sat with that thought for a little while and asked myself even if I thought I could. And the answer I felt coming back was a resounding no.

“It felt like the betrayal of an intimacy maybe. I’m not totally sure. I come from a background in nonfiction in the social sciences, so observing and presenting the lives of others isn’t new to me. But fictionalizing them for my own work feels odd. I was just curious if this is an issue you,” I guess he meant John, “or Craig ever deal with.” Or you, Godwin. “Or if using individuals in your own life as the bases for characters is something that comes totally natural to both of you? Am I missing a major tool in my writing by not doing this? Do you have any suggestions on how to work on this?”

Godwin, boiling all that down, what’s your feeling about taking the people you know in your real life and using them as inspiration for the characters in the work you write?

**Godwin Jabangwe:** I think it’s a great thing to do. What I would suggest is to combine three or four different people into one. Pick what you need from that one person and then you build a character. Don’t make a facsimile copy of that person. So if you have like three or four people that you know, or you want one specific thing, then you take that one specific thing and then you build a whole other character that’s not a direct mirror reflection of that person. I think that’s how I would go about that.

**John:** Megana, I was also thinking about you because having read your scripts you are very specifically portraying a kind of, because of your history, people I feel like you know very specifically. Are any of those people based on specific people in your own life? Do you feel like you’re asking permission? Are you sort of taking them in? What’s your relationship to some of the characters you’re portraying in your scripts?

**Megana:** That’s a great point. I feel most comfortable taking from my own life and sort of making fun of things that I personally have done. And if anything is inspired by – like I have one script inspired by a bunch of Indian aunties that I grew up with. And that I feel like I am doing with so much love and it’s not exact things that they’re saying.

But I had a friend who actually wrote a script with dialogue that we had had together lifted.

**Craig:** Ooh.

**Megana:** And, yeah, I’m curious to hear your guy’s thoughts.

**Craig:** What about you, John? Do you do this? Is it part of your tool box?

**John:** I do to some degree. And so I was even just this morning on a Zoom and I was thinking back to an early script I’d done that got made and it was like, oh yeah, I wouldn’t want to say that character is based on this real life person, but it was important that I actually knew that this person could exist. It was sort of an extreme character. And it’s like, oh no, no, no, there’s a real person who is that person who can do those things. And so I think it’s important that you should be able to imagine somebody in real life being those characters. So if you don’t even have the exact – it’s not based on one person that that person could exist.

This comedy that I’m doing right now I’m writing for some very specific actors with very specific voices knowing that we may not get those actors. But I know my sense will be at least one person in that role. And so then if it makes sense in the script with that person it can make sense with other people, too. So that’s the kind of appropriation of not real people, but actors you’re sort of casting in your movie at the start.

**Craig:** So, Austin, I think what you’re hearing is that everyone is different. And some people do it and some people don’t. And you start with a realization about yourself. I think that’s good enough. You can stop right there. You don’t write those people into your life and are you missing a major tool in your writing? I don’t think so. Because you don’t instinctively feel like you should do it.

I don’t do it. I know that. I never do it. Not out of moral reasons. It’s just not the way my mind works. I tend to daydream and you know like in your dreams there are other people. And those other people say things. And they’re not you. And you don’t know what they’re going to say before they say them, but they all came out of your brain, because you’re dreaming it. So we can do it. So I just try and do that when I’m awake. I do a lot of daydreaming imagining people and what they would do, and think, and feel. And putting myself in their shoes. And that’s how I do it. Everybody is different.

I would – trust your gut on this. If it works for you, great. If it doesn’t, you’re not missing out.

**John:** So we have one last question on the Workflowy here about open writing assignment and I’m going to actually just skip the question and just ask the folks on this Zoom about their experience with open writing assignments over the last few years. Because you guys have all pursued them. And so I think I might start with Godwin. We also call Etai. So, it’s confusing we’re calling Godwin Etai. We call him both.

Godwin, what’s been your experience pursuing projects that are out there in the world over the last couple of years? How much prep are you doing when you’re going out to try to land one of those jobs? What does it feel like?

**Godwin:** It’s a lot of work. And most times it’s frustration because it doesn’t go your way. I’ve had one where I prepared a pitch and by the time I went to the meeting to pitch and I got there and they told me that they weren’t doing the thing anymore. Because Disney had bought…

Yeah, like they didn’t bother to tell me all day. And I drove all the way to Burbank. And they’re like, “Oh, you’re here. We should let you know that we’re now longer doing this thing anymore.” So, you know, it’s like that. And then there’s some way you learn to pick the ones that you actually want to do, but in the beginning you’re just going for everything, because you’re like, ooh, I really want to do this.

And so over time I’ve learned that sometimes it’s OK to say I’ll pass on this. There’s nothing in it that I can give to the story. So, but then that takes time and a little getting to know – you will find one that works for you eventually. So, yeah, that’s been my experience. It’s a lot of frustration.

**John:** Megan, you’ve pitched on these kind of projects, too. How do you decide when something is something you’re really pursuing versus you know what that’s a fishing expedition? I’m not going to try to get that one.

**Megan:** I think upon reading whatever it is, an adaptation or whatever, I feel like there’s a pretty quick thing of like, ooh, this is something I’m interested in. This is something that excites me. And I feel like you got to have that kind of right away. And maybe not. Because if you do get it, you’re going to be on it for a long time. And if you’re not excited about the beginning, like you’re going to do a better job on something that you are genuinely excited about.

**John:** Yeah. Stuart? What’s your feeling on OWAs?

**Stuart:** Yeah, I mean, by the time I am pitching I have to kind of know the whole thing. The difference between prepping for a pitch and writing the project is one more step. So, the work that goes into that pitch is considerable. And I’ve had the same experience as Godwin where like you do weeks of work on something, you love it, and then you find out they killed the project, or somebody else already got the job. Or you go in and you do the pitch, you think you nailed it, you don’t hear anything for three months, and then a Deadline article comes out about some mega celebrity has been signed on and it’s their pet project.

And these days I would say I’m a little bit more protective of my time. But you have to love it. You have to want to do it. You hear about it and immediately it’s like clear my schedule, I’m so jazzed. And otherwise I’m probably not doing it.

**John:** Yeah. My organizing principle for 2021 has been hell yeah or no. That basically everything has to fall into one category. Either I’m absolutely so excited to do it, or nah. And to say no more often.

**Craig:** What about Matthew? He’s so quiet and I want to know what he thinks.

**Matthew:** I haven’t done any open writing assignments, but I’ve done a comparable thing for music a lot. And it is kind of funny, I suppose, how similar those two things really are. Because you’re competing with a lot of other people and there’s so much work that goes into something that you’re probably not going to get. And I’ve had such more rewarding experiences when, you know, you just know that you’re the one. You’re the one they’re going with from the beginning, which is like, of course – of course that would be more rewarding. But it’s tough to go up against a bunch of other people because you don’t know what everyone else is submitting.

And I imagine that’s probably what open writing assignments are like, too. It’s like you’re fighting against this imaginary foe that’s making all the right moves.

**Craig:** Well, it always struck me about open writing assignments that the only reason they were open writing assignments is because the people who were offering it also didn’t know. I mean, that’s why you do that. Right? They all sit around a room and go, what, who? Who should do this? What kind of person? I don’t know. Well, I guess we’ll just put an ad out in the paper. And everybody at CAA and UTA and WME and all that stuff will just start sending people over.

And so you’re already in a bit of a hole because you’re working hard to try and imagine something, but you’re talking to people who don’t quite know what it is they want either.

**John:** Yeah.

**Craig:** That’s the trick of it.

**Stuart:** And there’s no feedback usually at the end of the tunnel.

**Craig:** Correct.

**Stuart:** Was I the worst you’ve ever heard? Or was I like a coin flip away from getting this?

**Craig:** They have no time for it. And I know that for myself when we go through casting I would love to be able to call every single person and talk through all of that stuff. I just can’t. I can’t do it. And I imagine that if they did nine out of ten writers would receive that information gracefully, and one would throw a tantrum and then go on Twitter. And so it kind of makes sense.

**John:** All right, so it is time for a game show segment. When we do our live shows we always love doing our game shows. So this is not a normal live show, but we have a small audience. We have a small audience of former Scriptnotes producers. So let’s welcome on two self-identified super fans who have listened to every episode of Scriptnotes to see how much they actually remember about what we said on the show. Probably more than we do.

First let’s welcome Kate Hadley from Los Angeles. Welcome Kate.

**Craig:** Welcome Kate.

**Kate Hadley:** Hi.

**Craig:** Hi.

**John:** And Dion Bardeau – where are you living right now Dion?

**Dion Bardeau:** I live in Los Angeles as well.

**John:** All right. So we are all LA ringers. Sort of like how Jeopardy! this season has all been LA folks.

**Craig:** Yup.

**John:** We’re pulling on very local. We could go anywhere, but we are focusing on our LA folks. When did you start listening to the show, Kate Hadley?

**Kate:** I started listening in October 2011. So Episode 7, but I listened to all the back episodes in an afternoon.

**John:** Wow.

**Craig:** Wow. That’s awesome.

**John:** And Dion when did you start listening to the show?

**Dion:** So I started, it was in 2012, and it was maybe around Episode 40. It was the episode where you guys talked about how do you get an agent. And then I went back and listened to all the previous ones. But that’s where I started.

**Craig:** I’m still – I’ve listened to maybe three. [laughs] I’ve heard about three of these. They were good. They were all right.

**Dion:** You’re missing out, man.

**Craig:** I know. Believe me, I know. On everything.

**John:** All right. So we have cameras turned on. We’re going to ask a question. If you know the answer raise your hand and then we’ll call on you. And so we’ll try to be fair judges here, but we also have the other producers here who can be our jury if it comes down to it.

**Craig:** Do I get to also try and answer? Because I will not win.

**John:** Well, you can also see the answers though in the Workflowy though. So that’s not fair.

**Craig:** Oh, tht would be cheating.

**John:** That would be cheating. Craig, why don’t you ask the first question?

**Craig:** OK, here we go, guys. Are you ready?

**Dion:** Let’s do it. Good luck, Kate.

**Craig:** Good luck to both of you.

**Kate:** Good luck to you as well.

**Craig:** So you’re just going to raise your hand and John will call whichever one goes first. Here we go. And it’s not like Jeopardy! You don’t get locked out. But you don’t hear the rest of the question. Over the years we’ve done 15 deep dive episodes where we spend the entire show discussing one movie. What was the first movie to receive this treatment?

**John:** Kate.

**Kate:** I believe it was The Little Mermaid.

**John:** That is not correct. Dion?

**Dion:** I’m going to go with Raiders of the Lost Ark.

**Craig:** Raiders of the Lost Ark is correct. That is one point for Dion.

Kate. That was my other answer.

**Craig:** Of course it was. I think I would have gotten that right. .

**Kate:** That and Ghost.

**Craig:** I think I would have gotten that right. I think. All right. John, should I just keep–

**John:** Honestly, keep being the host. This is your Jeopardy! hosting try out.

**Craig:** This is my audition for Jeopardy! OK. Here we go.

**Dion:** Well, folks, this has been a good show. I’ll just take the W right there.

**Craig:** No sir. We are still in the first inning. Here we go. While the show has many amazing guests, the visitor first appeared by name in Episode 136 and was asked by John never to return. Guess if you have to guess. I have a guess. OK, can I do my guess?

**John:** Yeah.

**Craig:** My guess is Sexy Craig.

**John:** Sexy Craig is correct.

**Craig:** Yes, Sexy Craig. Yes!

**John:** So Sexy Craig’s first appearance was in Episode 135 by a voice. My name is John August, my name is Craig Mazin. And that was disturbing. But the next episode you labeled that voice Sexy Craig.

**Craig:** And Sexy Craig – the thing is he really doesn’t show up much.

**Dion:** I know. I can’t imagine a world without Sexy Craig.

**Craig:** Neither can I, exactly. Thank you.

**John:** I can and it’s glorious.

**Craig:** Yeah, John lives in that world.

**John:** It gets so uncomfortable. All right.

**Craig:** So it’s still 1-0. Here we go. Question number three. Scriptnotes Episode 235 was a live show featuring Jason Bateman and creators of Game of Thrones, David Benioff and D.B. Weiss. Weiss and Benioff were last minute replacements. Who was supposed to be the guest? That’s a hard one. That’s a hard one.

**John:** We’re stumping the super fans. I like this.

**Craig:** Yeah. This is great. Stumping the supers. I think we’re going to go–

**John:** Actually, no, we’ll go to the producers. Stuart Friedel, tell us the answer.

**Stuart:** I think I know the answer. I might be wrong. Is it Lawrence Kasdan?

**Craig:** It was Lawrence Kasdan.

**Kate:** I would have never gotten that.

**Craig:** He was not feeling well.

**Kate:** Like me, right now.

**Craig:** Scrambled up and got ourselves the GoT guys. All right, here we go. Question number four. Let’s get some redemption guys. In Scriptnotes 187 Live from New York John and Craig both sing songs. Who was their guest for that show? I was told these were super fans. [laughs]

**Dion:** I think now, right? Kate, what are we doing?

**Kate:** I’ve listened to every episode exactly once.

**Dion:** Every episode.

**Kate:** Once.

**Craig:** I know. Well there you go. By the way, I’ve got to tell you something. I don’t know who the guest was. I don’t know the answer to this. I don’t. I remember that Andrew Lippa was there, but he wasn’t our guest-guest was he?

**John:** He was our guest.

**Craig:** Oh, he was the guest.

**John:** That’s the correct answer. Yeah.

**Craig:** Oh, Andrew Lippa. OK, great. I thought he was sort of like, oh that’s right, Andrew Lippa.

**John:** The bonus would be if you could figure out what songs we actually sang. Craig, do you remember what song you sang?

**Craig:** Yes I do. I sang What More Can I Say from Falsetto Land.

**John:** Yeah. And I sang a song from Yank, which was a musical that never transferred to Broadway.

**Craig:** That was it. That was my big Broadway debut and final performance.

**Kate:** We’re going to get ourselves cut from this episode.

**Dion:** Yeah.

**Craig:** No, this one, one of you is going to get for sure. Here we go. Of course, the most famous Scriptnotes music is the opening jingle. How many notes are in it?

**John:** Kate.

**Kate:** Five.

**Craig:** Yes. I did the same thing you did. We all did the same thing. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5. Five is the answer. So I believe we are tied. We are tied at one a piece, which is exactly the way I like things. Here we go. In Episode 212 writer-director Mari Heller talks about her experience making Diary of a Teenage Girl. Craig said her film was better than this film written by Heller’s husband.

**John:** Dion.

**Craig:** Yes.

**Dion:** The Andy Samberg movie. I can’t think of it. Kate for the steal?

**Kate:** Hey Siri…I have no idea.

**Craig:** I’m pretty sure that I said it was better than MacGruber.

**Dion:** Ah, MacGruber.

**Craig:** By Jorma Taccone and MacGruber is actually the second best movie ever made. Diary of a Teenage Girl apparently was the best movie. OK, here we go. Speaking of movie power couples in 2020 John hosted separate deep dive episodes with each half of this duo, each of whom had made movies in awards contention. So we’re looking for – Dion.

**Dion:** Greta Gerwig and Noah Baumbach.

**Craig:** Yes!

**John:** Correct.

**Craig:** That’s right. For Little Women and for Marriage Story.

**Dion:** That’s right.

**Craig:** So it’s 2-1. Dion with two. Kate with one.

**Kate:** Oh, it’s 2-1. I thought it was like 3-1.

**Craig:** No, it’s 2-1.

**Kate:** Cool, so I can still—

**John:** You can still win this.

**Dion:** You’re stealing it, Kate.

**Craig:** Absolutely. Everyone is in it. Here’s another marriage question. John and Craig have mentioned their spouses many times over the 500 episodes. What are their names?

**John:** Kate.

**Kate:** Mike, Melissa.

**Craig:** Yes! And we are tied at 2-2 and here’s the best part, there’s only one question left.

**Dion:** Here we go.

**Kate:** Oh dear god.

**Craig:** How can you not be romantic about baseball? Here we go. Oh my god, this is so hard. [laughs] Oh my god. I don’t know the answer to this. What are John and Craig’s Myers-Briggs personality types? Bonus points if you can answer with John’s newest personality test result too.

**Dion:** Oh god.

**Craig:** This is brutal. I’m with you. I’m with both of you on this.

**Kate:** I’m going to have to have to just guess.

**John:** It’s worth a guess. Worth a guess.

**Craig:** Listen, it’s the final shot. The clock is counting down. Go for it.

**Kate:** INFP and can I remember, I think it’s the other one.

**Craig:** Yeah, I think at this point this is just a fishing expedition.

**Kate:** Oh, it is. It’s completely–

**John:** It’s like the open writing assignment of personality types.

**Craig:** The one you mentioned wasn’t one of them. I think we can say it ain’t happening here.

**Kate:** Oh no. It’s not happening.

**Craig:** Apparently both of us were the same Myers-Briggs personality type, which I didn’t realize. We are both ENTJ. Otherwise known as the mad lunatic. But however in Episode 437 John revealed that he had evolved. I don’t like evolved because that makes it seem like you got better than me. You devolved into an ENFP. Oh, you actually flipped two of the things there. So, you’ve changed quite a bit.

Here’s the good news, folks. Because it’s a tie you’re both winners.

**John:** You’re both winners. So thank you for listening to all those episodes and to give you a chance to listen back to all those episodes we are giving you free lifetime memberships to Scriptnotes Premium.

**Dion:** How about that? That’s awesome.

**Craig:** It’s real money.

**Dion:** That’s fantastic.

**Craig:** And it’s not costing me anything, I know that much. [laughs]

**John:** So thank you both very much for listening to the show. It really means a tremendous amount. And thank you for coming on the show and playing this dumb game with us.

**Craig:** We are nothing without you.

**Kate:** Thank you.

**Dion:** Thank you for having me.

**Kate:** It was wonderful.

**Dion:** Thank you guys so much. You guys were Master Class before Master Class. You have no idea. Well, you probably do have some idea. I’m sure you’ve helped Kate. You’ve definitely helped me and thousands of others. So thank you. Really appreciate it fellas.

**Craig:** Thank you, Dion. That’s so nice.

**John:** Thank you, Dion.

**Kate:** You guys are my One Cool Thing.

**Dion:** There you go. Always and forever.

**Craig:** Thank you, Kate.

**Dion:** Appreciate you guys.

**Craig:** Thank you. All right. Keep listening guys. Thank you.

**Dion:** I will. Take care guys.

**Kate:** Bye.

**Craig:** See you later. That was exciting.

**John:** That was nice.

**Craig:** That went right down to the wire there, you know, because they were tied and we were going to that last question. I don’t know, I felt the tension of championship on the line. Those were hard questions. Who came up with those?

**John:** So I came up with most of them. Megana threw in the Myers-Briggs things at the end. And I don’t know if I would have gotten that one right.

**Megana:** I really thought that was going to be super easy. You guys are both ENTJs.

**Craig:** I don’t even know if I would have remembered my own.

**John:** Yeah.

**Craig:** Wow. You know what though? That’s what you want for the last. That’s what you want a tiebreaker to be. It’s got to be a real skull-cracker, you know.

**John:** I really thought they would have gotten the Lawrence Kasdan. That was a big deal and then he actually came back on in Episode 247 to sort of make good on–

**Craig:** That one felt like more of a gettable one. But you know the one that I was impressed with was Dion getting Greta Gerwig and Noah Baumbach. That was pretty good.

**John:** Because those were episodes you didn’t listen to.

**Craig:** I don’t listen to any of the episodes. You could just say those like all 100, all 499 before this.

**Megana:** Also, if you guys thought those were hard, just wait for the premium segment because I wrote all of those.

**Craig:** Oh boy.

**John:** Yeah.

**Craig:** Here we go.

**John:** Before we get to the premium segment Kate did a great job of setting up our One Cool Things. So my One Cool Thing this week – I may have had it on a previous episode, but it’s so good I want to make sure everybody knows about it. If you are not sleeping with a white noise machine you should try sleeping with a white noise machine. It genuinely will help you.

And, yes, you can do it off your phone but then it just loops and it’s not as good. The best white noise machine is this Electro-Fan White Noise Machine. It is a little electronic device you plug in. Wirecutter ranks it the best. It is genuinely terrific. So good that we actually travel with it rather than using the one on our phone.

So you probably need a white noise machine. You should try it. It just shuts out the outside world completely. So the best one is this little $49 white noise machine. You should get it.

**Craig:** OK, great. I do use – I use an app on the iPad, I admit it. But I also use ear plugs, so I think the fancier white noise machine value would be lost on me. Also, the nice thing about the app is it gives you pink noise, white noise, brown noise, purple noise.

**John:** This gives you a choice of sort of what kind of sound you want.

**Craig:** I like the brown noise. That’s my jam. Here’s my One Cool Thing. I don’t know if we have this in the United States, but I’m here in Calgary, Alberta, Canada. We’re working on The Last of Us. We have a fairly large facility for the production. And we have all sorts of people working on it. And every day there is lunch. And the old way of doing things was somebody would come around, typically a poor, aggrieved PA to say, “Oh, we’re taking lunch orders. What would you like? We’re ordering from these two places. Here’s a menu.” And everyone is like, what, I don’t know, eh. And it takes forever.

And then you go and something went wrong. And everyone has got like a million little changes. So what they do here is they use something called Hunger Hub. And the night before you go on and it shows you there are two restaurant choices and there are a bunch of menu options for each restaurant. And you pick it. Pick it that night. And then it all just happens magically. And I was like what a smart way to streamline a miserable process.

So when we all get back to our writing rooms and real life, once Covid is gone, maybe some enterprising service if there isn’t one already will be doing something like this in the US. Hunger Hub.

**John:** So like Mythic Quest doesn’t do that for its lunch orders?

**Craig:** No, I mean, I haven’t been in the room, you know, physically for Mythic Quest since well over a year ago. But, no, it would be the–

**John:** Old-fashioned way.

**Craig:** Pass around a sheet and write down what you want from the menu of the thing, and the thing, and the thing.

**John:** Progress. Canadian progress.

**Craig:** Progress. Or as we say in Canada, progress.

**John:** Progress. So if you are a person who has listened to many of the back episodes we would love to have your help. We are coming up with the 500 Episode Listener Guide, so this is an update to our 300 Episode Listener Guide. Megana is actively reading through people’s submissions for what they think are the best episodes, the ones you cannot miss.

She also spearheaded this week this drive to get an index of all the episodes, which has been so helpful, so we can see actually what episodes have Three Page Challenges, or How Would This Be a Movie, who our guests were. So if you are looking at which episodes should I go back and listen to, or I really want the craft episodes, this index will be available to you as well. So we’ll have a link in the show notes to that. But also tell us what you think should be in the Listeners’ Guide. So you go to johnaugust.com/guide and there’s a little form you can fill out to tell us which episodes you think people should really listen to. So do that if you could.

And that is our show. Scriptnotes is produced by Megana Rao. It is edited by Matthew Chilelli. Special thanks to Dustin Box, Nima Yousefi, Chris Sont, and Amy August for their help this week.

**Craig:** Oh, Amy August.

**John:** Amy August helped with the index.

**Craig:** Oh, are you paying her?

**John:** I am paying her. I pay people.

**Craig:** Everybody gets paid.

**John:** Here’s how this came to be. Mike and I went out to a restaurant for the first time, like an actual restaurant to have our anniversary dinner.

**Craig:** Nice.

**John:** And it’s owned by this chef whose son was in preschool with Amy. And when Mike went to the bathroom he’s like oh my god I saw Bruno was working back, he was washing dishes in the kitchen. And I was like, oh, the kitchen of our family business is really tedious data entry. And so Amy did the tedious data entry.

**Craig:** Nice!

**John:** Yeah.

**Craig:** All right. I hope you paid her well.

**John:** I paid her minimum wage. I paid her $15 an hour.

**Craig:** OK. I mean, we did have a series of episodes about how we were aiming for $20 an hour, but OK. I guess if it’s your kid.

**John:** It’s my kid, yes, so it’s the kid discount. I’ve paid for everything for her entire life.

**Craig:** You did provide her with everything else.

**John:** Our intro this week was by the amazing Matthew Chilelli. Our outro, Matthew if you could please play us an outro, the very first outro you ever did for Scriptnotes. That feels like a good bookend for us.

**Craig:** Ooh.

**John:** If you have an intro or an outro, just an outro actually, you can send us a link to ask@johnaugust.com. That’s also the place where you send longer questions like the ones we answered today. For short questions on Twitter I am @johnaugust.

You can find the show notes for this episode and all episodes at johnaugust.com. That’s also where you find the transcripts and sign up for our weekly-ish newsletter called Inneresting which has lots of links to things about writing.

We have t-shirts, and they’re great. So you should show your pride of 500 episodes with a new t-shirt. They’re at Cotton Bureau. You can sign up to become a premium member at Scriptnotes.net where you get all the back episodes and bonus segments. That’s also where you can hear our producers make fun of me and Craig for not understanding the show that we’ve done 499 episodes of in this segment we’re about to record.

So thank you to all of our producers and Matthew for coming back for this special 500th episode. And thank you everyone for listening.

**Craig:** Thanks guys. 500 episodes. Amazing.

[Bonus segment]

**John:** Megana Rao, you are in charge of the podcast from here forward. So take it away. What do you want us to do?

**Megana:** OK. So we have a trivia game for you.

**Craig:** Oh boy.

**Megana:** And it is a mix of Scriptnotes trivia, but also as we talked about in that discussion on your friendship there’s a little bit of The Newlywed Game. So it’s a little bit also of how well you two know each other and have been listening to each other. And then we have a sprinkling of Stuart-written, Stuart-centric questions that are also in here.

**Craig:** Oh. OK.

**Stuart:** I thought I specifically didn’t want to get too Stuart-centric.

**Craig:** Well, no one cares, Stuart.

**Stuart:** Stuart-ed it out. All right.

**Megana:** I feel like Stuart lure is a big part of Scriptnotes.

**Craig:** It is.

**John:** Totally.

**Megana:** So I felt like it had to be in there.

**Craig:** It is. OK, well I’m very excited. I hope I lose. I’m going to lose. I don’t have to hope.

**John:** I’m nervous.

**Megana:** So there’s certain questions that are just specifically targeted for one of you. But for the other ones you guys can raise your hands.

**Craig:** I see. We will raise our hands if there is a competitive question.

**Megana:** Cool. And then the producers and Matthew each have three or four questions that we will ask and I wish you both the best of luck. So, we’re starting with Stuart.

**Craig:** Oh, god.

**Stuart:** What location does Craig frequently refer to as his sacred place?

**Craig:** I’ve raised my hand.

**Megana:** You can answer that one.

**Craig:** The shower.

**Megana:** Correct. I wanted to start off easy.

**Craig:** Thank you. I have a feeling that that’s a set up. A total set up. I’m going to go down in flames now.

**Stuart:** Question two. You’ve done 17 episodes where you dissect one movie and nine where it’s just the two of you analyzing a movie. Can you name seven of these deep dives?

**John:** I’m going to try this first. Raiders of the Lost Ark. Aliens. The Little Mermaid. Unforgiven. Die Hard. If we’re going to count Marriage Story and Ghost.

**Craig:** Yes. See, we help each other.

**John:** We help each other. What were the other ones? What did I miss?

**Stuart:** Raiders, Little Mermaid, Groundhog Day.

**John:** Oh, Groundhog Day, yeah.

**Craig:** Of course.

**Stuart:** Ghost. Whiplash. The Addams Family. Unforgiven. The Princess Bride. Clueless.

**Craig:** Right.

**Stuart:** And the Christmas bonus episode on Die Hard.

**Megana:** Wait. I don’t believe that we’ve done an Aliens deep dive.

**John:** I think we’ve always meant to do one and we didn’t do it.

**Craig:** Yeah. I was thinking, man, I really don’t know this show very well because I don’t remember that at all.

**John:** It was a dream I had. A fugue state.

**Craig:** It was a dream.

**Stuart:** Question three in the highlighted Stuart section. In the Scriptnotes Wikipedia article it says that Stuart’s voice was never heard on the show except for Episode 259, The Exit Interview. This is in fact incorrect. When else was Stuart heard on the show?

**John:** Huh. Well you probably said something during a live show. I feel like there was going to be some moment at which you stood up in the audience where I acknowledged. So I bet we’re going to hear your voice there. But I’m trying to think of another example of – I don’t think you read any questions aloud or anything.

**Craig:** I would have said at the Christmas show I think we might have made him say something. Like I’m Stuart. But I can’t remember.

**John:** Or like, no, I’m Stuart, or I’m Stuart.

**Craig:** Oh that I’m real or something.

**Stuart:** You’re conflating a few things but you’re definitely on the right track. At one point – there are a few Stuart doppelgängers in Los Angeles and at one point we had the idea to get all of them in a row and to all stand up at the live show and wave. I think only one or maybe two showed up, but still we had the effect of three bearded redheads.

But there was an episode, according to this it was the 124 Q&A from the Holiday Spectacular. And I got on stage and I know that because my parents have a photo from that.

**Craig:** Of course they do.

**Stuart:** On their living room table or whatever.

**John:** You know, really we should have brought on Stuart’s parents as the Scriptnotes super fans because they are–

**Craig:** I know. Up until the point where Stuart stops producing it. And then we never listened to it again.

**Stuart:** They’re fans. My dad. My dad certainly listens.

**Craig:** He’s a dentist.

**Stuart:** He’s dedicated.

**Craig:** He’s a dentist.

**Stuart:** And maybe the rest of you have had the same experience, but my parents know nothing about what I do for a living. And Scriptnotes has been a very nice – they can speak some of the language now.

**Craig:** My parents have never listened to it either. So it’s genetic.

**Stuart:** I will point out though that my wife has been a voice on the show many times. More than me.

**Craig:** Ah, reading questions? Or–?

**Stuart:** Originally back in the day when you would have an article you were talking about or discussing and you wanted to do the reenactment, she would be the female reenactment voice.

**Craig:** Right. She was the only woman we knew. Those were different days. All right. Well we kind of bombed out on that one. All right, what’s next?

**Megana:** Next up we have Matthew asking the questions.

**Matthew:** Question four. Which two guests have come on to specifically talk about sex on screen?

**John:** Craig had his hand up.

**Craig:** I think it was Dan Savage and Rachel Bloom.

**Matthew:** That’s correct. That’s correct.

**Craig:** It is correct. See, John doesn’t get it.

**John:** What about Rachel Bloom? Rachel Bloom came on specifically.

**Craig:** I said Rachel Bloom. Dan Savage and Rachel Bloom.

**Megana:** Can you do episode numbers John or Craig?

**John:** No.

**Craig:** Oh wow, really?

**John:** So, yes, Dan Savage. But I was thinking actors. So I was thinking it should be Rebel Wilson and Rachel Bloom. That would be my answer.

**Craig:** Rebel Wilson was part of the dirty show. So she didn’t really come on to talk about sex.

**John:** That’s fair.

**Craig:** She just came on to be a bit bawdy.

**John:** She was bawdy. She was mostly talking about shitting in a beret.

**Craig:** Correct. Which is the best thing I’ve ever heard in my life. But Dan and Rachel very specifically we were talking about all the fun bits and parts.

**John:** All right.

**Craig:** I feel great.

**John:** You’re actually beating me. So you should feel great.

**Craig:** That’s not why I feel great.

**Megana:** I mean, well John this one is specifically for you.

**John:** All right. Let’s see if I can get it right.

**Matthew:** Question five, John. What scene does Craig frequently refer to as the hardest he’s ever laughed?

**John:** Wow. What’s the hardest that Craig has ever laughed. Maybe it’s MacGruber where he’s offering sex to get out of something?

**Craig:** That’s a great scene. And happens multiple times in MacGruber. But that is not the answer.

**John:** What is the answer?

**Craig:** Well I have two that I refer to. I don’t know which one I refer to more than the other. But one is the naked fight in Borat and the other is the puppet vomiting in South Park Team America.

**John:** That’s the right one, right?

**Matthew:** Yeah, it’s Team America, the puke scene.

**Craig:** Yeah. Just the funniest thing.

**Matthew:** 286, 481, and 387.

**Craig:** Nice.

**Megana:** I just got tired of citing the episode. It’s multiple episodes.

**Matthew:** Possibly more.

**Craig:** Possibly more.

**John:** Great.

**Craig:** I mean, it’s amazing.

**Matthew:** And question number six for Craig. What is the first project John pitched on?

**Craig:** How to Eat Fried Worms.

**John:** That’s impressive.

**Craig:** I know my guy. I know my guy.

**Stuart:** Wow.

**John:** Bonus if you can answer what did I bring to that pitch meeting?

**Craig:** I don’t know, so I’m going to guess that you brought – because I believe it was in like a sandwich. Maybe you brought a sandwich with worms on it.

**John:** I did bring a Styrofoam container of worms that I dumped out on a plate for that.

**Craig:** Did you eat one?

**John:** I did not eat one. But they were worried I was going to eat one.

**Megana:** Did it go over well?

**John:** It went well. Yeah.

**Stuart:** Like living worms?

**John:** Yeah. Living worms. From a bait store. I had to drive to Santa Monica. There’s not a lot of bait stores in Los Angeles. So.

**Craig:** And when you got there they were like pitching on the open writing assignment for How to Eat Fried Worms?

**John:** That’s what it is.

**Craig:** The ninth nerd that came in here this morning. Exactly. We know you’re not a fisherman. We know that.

**John:** No. You can just look at me. I’m not a fisherman.

**Craig:** Yeah, you’re in the Writers Guild. OK, feeling good. Feeling good.

**Megana:** All right. And next up we have Godwin.

**Godwin:** My first question is what is the name of the sandwich Malcolm Spellman ate after recording Episode 185? And I can give you a hit. It’s from Mendocino Farms.

**John:** A sandwich study in heat?

**Godwin:** Yes.

**Craig:** Wow. I would have never in a million years. Wow.

**John:** The only reason I was pretty sure about that answer is because the Malcolm Spellman episode is titled A Study in Heat.

**Craig:** Ah. Do you know I once watched Malcolm eat an entire sleeve of Mint Oreo cookies? And the best part of it was while he was eating them, this was at my house, he was halfway through the sleeve. He said, “I hate these. I hate Mint Oreo cookies. I hate them.” And I’m like but why are you eating them? He goes, “I don’t know.”

And then he gets to the bottom of the sleeve and I’m like, dude, you’re going to be sick. And he goes, “No, it’s not even as much as you think. It’s like 250 calories.” And I’m like no it’s not. And he goes, “Yeah it is.” And I’m like, no, no, that’s per serving, not per sleeve. And he’s like, “What?” You have to imagine deeper, “What?”

And so he had eaten essentially like 2,000 or 3,000 calories worth of Mint Oreo cookies that he did not like. We talk about that a lot in my house. It was a great day.

**Godwin:** All right. Next question. Who were the first two Scriptnotes guests? John?

**John:** I think it was Aline and Derek. Derek Haas.

**Godwin:** No.

**Megana:** Craig, are you going to steal?

**Craig:** Give me a moment. Momentito. I’ve got nothing.

**Godwin:** It’s Franklin Leonard. And Aline.

**John:** And Aline, OK. That I guessed.

**Craig:** Franklin. Oh wow. I thought maybe Aline would have been like a trick, like a trap to fall into. But, all right, interesting. We both whiffed.

**John:** I very much believe that. But I’m also mesmerized by the idea of what if Franklin and Leonard were different people.

**Craig:** Oh, Franklin and Leonard.

**John:** Yeah. Wow. The power they would have.

**Craig:** The world of people with two first names is funny.

**Stuart:** Were they on one episode together or was it?

**Megana:** Episode 60. They both came together.

**Craig:** Wow.

**Godwin:** The next question is for Craig. What was the marquee feature of the Highland software?

**Craig:** I believe it was to melt PDFs.

**Godwin:** Correct.

**John:** Nicely done.

**Godwin:** And for my last question. There was a short-lived segment called Change Craig’s Mind. What was the first and only topic discussed? Yes John?

**John:** Ventriloquism.

**Godwin:** Correct.

**Craig:** Oh my god. That’s amazing. So, first of all, I wish we would bring that back.

**John:** We have to. Megana, please, put that on top of the Workflowy. We’ve got to bring that back.

**Craig:** That’s amazing because it’s such a challenge to change Craig’s mind. It’s a challenge. And I have – my feelings about ventriloquism have only deepened. My anger about it, my just general resentment that it’s considered–

**John:** An art form.

**Craig:** Entertainment. An art form? [laughs] I just get angrier about it by the day. OK, we have to bring that back. That’s a wonderful idea.

**John:** What’s so good about that segment is that you’re basically an anti-vaxxer when it comes to ventriloquism. Like the more facts we give you the deeper you dig into your bunker there.

**Craig:** Yeah. Because it’s like if vaccines actually were boring and pointless then I would be an anti-vaxxer. But they’re amazing and they save lives. Unlike ventriloquism, which is boring and stupid.

**Stuart:** Is it topics that you want your mind changed on?

**Craig:** I don’t come up with them. That’s the thing. I didn’t come up with that. It just happened.

**John:** Yeah.

**Craig:** Yeah.

**Megana:** Do we have a score count? So we’re moving on to Megan and–

**Craig:** Oh god. Was anyone keeping score? I wasn’t keeping score.

**John:** I wasn’t keeping score.

**Stuart:** Is there a prize for the winner?

**John:** I think Craig may be slightly ahead though honestly.

**Craig:** Do I get a free lifetime, because I pay the $6 a month, I do. I get charged $6 a month, so I’m hoping I get the free one.

**Megana:** We’ll think about it.

**Craig:** Fair enough.

**Megana:** All right. Megan, you’re up.

**Megan:** Question 11. On September 13, 2014, Stuart Friedel wrote an email based on a discussion in Episode 108. On September 10, 2018 at 3:02am, five years later, that email came through to the ask@johnaugust.com account. What was the discussion that you wanted to check in on?

**John:** Huh. I think the dates might be meaningful. But I don’t know.

**Craig:** The first date was what year?

**John:** 2014?

**Megan:** 2014.

**Craig:** And the second date was what year?

**Megan:** 2018.

**John:** Wow.

**Stuart:** Something there, it says five years later.

**Megan:** It does say five years later.

**Craig:** OK. That’s why I was asking.

**John:** So five years happened.

**Craig:** It was a five year checkup. This feels like something that the initial, my gut tells me that the initial email was something he was angry about. I don’t know why. I just feel like he was indignant and was thinking to himself you guys, five years from now, you’ll see. And he was probably right. But I don’t know what it is.

**John:** It could have been a situation where we may have asked on the show for – let us know five years from now sort of what happens. But I can’t think what the specific scenario was.

**Craig:** We don’t know this.

**John:** Tell us. We don’t know this.

**Megan:** It said, “Dear John’s current assistant. Please look back on Scriptnotes Episode 108 where John and Craig discussed the future of iPads in movie theaters and remind them that this next episode is to address the five years later of it all. Sincerely yours, John’s current, 2013, assistant.”

**Craig:** Yes, that’s right. Got it. So this wasn’t about Stuart’s indignant. This was a disagreement that John and I had about whether or not iPads and the use of them would become prominent in theaters with children. And what we didn’t know was that nobody would be in theaters. Not only would there not be iPads, or there wouldn’t be humans.

**John:** Yeah.

**Craig:** That’s right. I forgot that one. That was a good one.

**John:** I’m happy there are not iPads in theaters. I could have envisioned a scenario in which that happened and it would have been worse. But not worse than a pandemic.

**Craig:** No. No.

**John:** So if I had to choose iPads in theaters versus a global pandemic that killed millions.

**Craig:** I don’t know. [laughs] I’m on the fence.

**John:** Yeah.

**Craig:** I’m on the fence. OK. Next question.

**Megan:** Question 12. In Episode 240 who do you decide would win in an all-out brawl to the death, John or Craig? And why?

**John:** I said that Craig would win just because he would be just savage and he would not stop.

**Craig:** I think I probably said the same thing about John. That John would win because he would clamp down or do something really like vicious that I wasn’t expecting. Maybe like a neck bite.

**Megan:** Per Megana the answer is Craig, because he’s angry and heavier, but most importantly because he would not hesitate. There would be no pause.

**Craig:** That’s true. That’s true. You don’t have any advantage if you don’t use your advantage. That’s the thing. You’re right. So I got to get him on the ground fast is the key. I got to get John down on the ground.

**John:** If we were in a Zombie apocalypse scenario and needed to say like, OK, if I get bitten you need to kill me, I would tell Craig to be the one to kill me because he would do it.

**Megana:** Oh.

**Craig:** Oh yeah.

**John:** Do it for the good of the group. Yeah. He’s the one you want to pick.

**Craig:** No, I would do it even before. Even before you got the sentence done.

**John:** Absolutely.

**Craig:** I always joke like that with Melissa. Because you know that Michael Haneke movie where he has to kill his wife with the pillow because she has Alzheimer’s? It’s the most beautiful Oscar-y movie ever. And I’m like I’m going to do that to you. And she’s like–

**John:** That’s how much I love you.

**Craig:** When she walks in she’s like, “I cannot remember where I put my keys.” And I’m like pillow time. That’s enough. [laughs] That’s all I needed to hear. Let’s go. Come on.

**Megan:** Question 13. Who is the credited producer on Episode 17 of Scriptnotes?

**Craig:** Ooh. OK. Well, so the implication is that it’s pre-Stuart, so I’m going to say Nima?

**John:** I’m going to guess Carlton [Miniacus] who was – it was a pseudonym that was being used.

**Craig:** Who?

**Stuart:** Did we fact check this one?

**Megana:** We did.

**Stuart:** Because I wrote this question, but I wasn’t certain of the answer.

**Craig:** I can’t wait to hear what the actual answer theoretically is.

**Megan:** The answer is there’s no credited producer, because it was before Matthew, and so Stuart was credited as the editor.

**Craig:** Oh, so it was a trick question.

**Stuart:** I actually thought you guys would get this because of the spoilers. We discussed this in the opening.

**Craig:** Well that’s the thing. I thought that maybe there was some random person.

**John:** Being so specific, because we didn’t start crediting you until what episode?

**Stuart:** I don’t know. But this was the exact – if you read in the Google Doc this is the exact discussion we’re having. It originally was Episode 5. We decided that it would be more of a red herring if we used a more “random” sounding number.

**Craig:** I see.

**John:** Clever.

**Craig:** So this was just a set up to humiliate us. I understand.

**Stuart:** Exactly.

**Craig:** Fine. Done. Achieved.

**Megana:** OK, final round. John, what recent meme shares a name with Craig’s family member?

**Craig:** That’s great.

**John:** I don’t know what the recent meme is. I can’t think of a Jessie or a Jack or a Melissa.

**Craig:** Can I steal?

**Megana:** OK, Craig, you can steal.

**Craig:** My sister’s name is Karen.

**John:** Ooh, that’s right.

**Craig:** My sister’s children call her “a Karen” all the time. It infuriates her. It’s wonderful. She’s never asked for the manager, by the way, ever. Not once.

**Megana:** So in an early episode, Episode 2, you both declare blank as the death of all screenwriters.

**Craig:** Both declare blank as the death of all screenwriters? Ooh. Go ahead.

**John:** So like lack of limitations, or freedom in a way?

**Megana:** Craig, do you want to do a guess?

**Craig:** Wildly different guess. Focus groups. Movie focus groups.

**Megana:** The correct answer is children.

**Craig:** Oh, we said it before.

**John:** Obviously, yeah.

**Craig:** That’s correct. Yeah. Stuart gets it now. It’s the death of all screenwriters. They just hollow you out from the inside.

**Stuart:** I like my kid personally.

**Craig:** Just wait. [laughs]

**John:** Just wait till that kid can get out of the crib and actually find you.

**Craig:** Just wait. Oh, the places you’ll go.

**Megana:** OK, we are at our last question.

**John:** Oh.

**Craig:** Buckle up.

**Megana:** I want you both to close your eyes, meditate on your lives, your careers, almost a decade, 500 episodes of Scriptnotes. What is your favorite quality in Megana Rao? Just kidding. I’m just kidding. You guys can email me afterwards. OK, the real question is what is your favorite quality in your cohost?

**Craig:** Ooh.

**John:** Aw.

**Craig:** This is, now it’s just going to be about tears.

**John:** Yeah. I would say that Craig is just remarkably good at winging it and just speaking extemporaneously about whatever topic without any real preparation at all. And so it’s not that he hasn’t thought about these things before, but he can just actually articulate clear, cogent thoughts without any preparation and make it seem so effortless. And with me I feel like I’m Taylor Swift where all I do is try, try, try.

**Craig:** [laughs] But Taylor Swift is hot. You know? And super successful. So I think that works out great.

**John:** So it works out well for me, too.

**Craig:** It works out well for you. I would say that I think the thing that I appreciate the most in John and have for a long time is that he is empathetic in a logical way. Because there’s this mushy, weepy spirituality empathy and I’ve said many times on the show I literally don’t even understand what spirituality is. I don’t know what the word means. Any time people try and explain it to me I’m just like religion right. And they’re like, yeah, but no. And I’m like nah, it is.

But John has a very logical kind of empathy and that has I think – it’s rubbed off on me. I think I’ve learned from it. Because I respect it. And he makes the idea of kindness and acceptance and making your first choice the benefit of the doubt choice in a rational way. I’ve learned from that. And I’ve definitely – he’s been a good model for me because my first choice typically was just to destroy.

It’s my second choice. I don’t want people to think that it’s not there anymore. It’s right there. It’s right behind it. But, yes, I would say that for sure.

**John:** Aw. Thank you Craig.

**Craig:** You’re welcome.

**Megana:** Well thank you both for playing. You’re both winners.

**Craig:** I feel like a winner. I’m so glad I got anything right. I was terrified.

**Megana:** I guess Craig is kind of the winner because he had the upset a bit.

**John:** Yeah, he did. But still.

**Craig:** Kind of the winner is the best I’ve ever been. Kind of a winner.

**John:** I think we were the winners to have such amazing producers and editor.

**Craig:** Segue Man.

**John:** Here with us today.

**Craig:** Yes, we are the beneficiaries of all of you. And your hard work. And you make us sound good. You make us look good. Definitely make me sound and look good, because I don’t, you know–

**John:** And I’m always just so happy and proud to see your smiling faces and to see you guys kicking ass out there.

**Craig:** Exactly. That’s awesome.

**John:** So thank you for being so awesome.

**Craig:** Yeah. And there’s been like marriages and children and all these wonderful life changes that are happening. Look, we do another 500 of these.

**John:** Another 10 years. Wow.

**Craig:** At that point I fully plan on being in the hover chair from Wall-E. But you guys will still be vital members of society. [laughs]

**John:** And I’ll be begging Megan to get me a job working on some Marvel project.

**Craig:** Yes. And my wife will come to me with the pillow and be like. It’s time. It’s you that gets the pillow, my friend.

**John:** All right. Thank you all so much.

**Craig:** Thanks folks.

**Stuart:** Great seeing you guys.

**Megan:** So nice to see you.

**Craig:** Bye.

Links:

* Find out more information about the [The Scriptnotes Book](https://www.scriptnotes.net)
* Review the past 500 episodes at [The Scriptnotes Index](https://johnaugust.com/scriptnotes-index)
* [Stuart Friedel](https://www.imdb.com/name/nm2069640/) on [the web](http://stuartfriedel.com/)
* [Godwin Jabangwe](https://twitter.com/godwinitai) on [Twitter](https://twitter.com/godwinitai)
* [Megan McDonnell](https://www.imdb.com/name/nm6876585/) on [IMDb](https://www.imdb.com/name/nm6876585/)
* [Matthew Chilelli](https://www.imdb.com/name/nm7072990/) on [Twitter](https://twitter.com/machelli?lang=en), [Instagram](https://www.instagram.com/machellic/), [Soundcloud](https://soundcloud.com/matthew-chilelli), and [the web](https://www.matthewchilelli.com/)
* [Megana Rao](https://twitter.com/meganarao) on [Twitter](https://twitter.com/meganarao)
* [Get a Scriptnotes T-shirt!](https://cottonbureau.com/people/scriptnotes-podcast)
* [Gift a Scriptnotes Subscription](https://scriptnotes.supportingcast.fm/gifts) or [treat yourself to a premium subscription!](https://scriptnotes.supportingcast.fm/)
* [John August](https://twitter.com/johnaugust) on Twitter
* [Craig Mazin](https://twitter.com/clmazin) on Twitter
* [John on Instagram](https://www.instagram.com/johnaugust/?hl=en)
* [Outro](http://johnaugust.com/2013/scriptnotes-the-outros) (and [intro](http://johnaugust.com/2013/scriptnotes-the-outros)!) by Matthew Chilelli ([send us yours!](http://johnaugust.com/2014/outros-needed))
* Scriptnotes is produced by Megana Rao and edited by Matthew Chilelli.

Email us at ask@johnaugust.com

You can download the episode [here](http://traffic.libsyn.com/scriptnotes/500standard.mp3).

Scriptnotes, Episode 501: Patterns of Success, Transcript

May 26, 2021 Scriptnotes Transcript

The original post for this episode can be found [here](https://johnaugust.com/2021/patterns-of-success).

**John August:** Hello and welcome. My name is John August.

**Craig Mazin:** My name is Craig Mazin.

**John:** And this is Episode 501 of Scriptnotes, a podcast about screenwriting and things that are interesting to screenwriters. Today on the show we look at what patterns we’ve noticed in successful writers and perhaps more importantly what things tend to derail careers. We will also have follow up on genres and typos, plus a listener question that I suspect will become a storyline in this, our 11th Season of Scriptnotes. 11 Seasons Craig. This is our season premiere.

**Craig:** I only found out from you yesterday that we have seasons.

**John:** Yeah. So seasons are 50 episodes a piece, so this is our 11th season we’re starting.

**Craig:** Oh, OK. I thought that maybe we were just midseason, mid-season one of a thousand episodes. Are we going to get to a thousand episodes?

**John:** I don’t know, Craig. That’s a long–

**Craig:** That just seems stupid, right?

**John:** That’s 10 years.

**Craig:** How could you possibly say something 1,000 times?

**John:** Yeah. You could though.

**Craig:** That said, 500 is a lot, yet here we are.

**John:** It is a lot. We started working on the book and we talked about the book last week. It’s really exciting, but gosh darn we have just a lot of text there. A lot of stuff to go through.

**Craig:** Yup. And, you know, I don’t want to pat ourselves on the back or anything, but I think we have a decent signal to noise ratio also. We don’t do a lot of empty patter like the kind that I’m engaging in right now.

**John:** We cut all the empty patter out of the book which is so much fun. So, this week we’ll be sending through sample chapters, or at least one sample chapter, to people who’ve signed up at Scriptnotes.net. That’s where you can sign up for the back episodes, but you can also sign up for the mailing list for the book. And the sample chapters look just great. So I was just working on one, a sample one with Greta Gerwig’s interview, and we also have a Craig Mazin special chapter that you can proof before we send out.

**Craig:** Excellent. Oh my.

**John:** Oh my.

**Craig:** Oh my.

**John:** And in our bonus segment for today’s episode we’re going to talk about books, but not the Scriptnotes book, but just what we like in books from physical books, to fonts, to bindings. What we look for in books, not as text but the actual objects themselves. Because I want the Scriptnotes book to be a good book, so let’s talk about what we like in books.

**Craig:** Oh, OK.

**John:** Yeah. Because you like a book. You like the Art & Arcana Book, that D&D book. That was great.

**Craig:** By Kyle Newman. Yes. I enjoy – it’s not the only kind of book I like. [laughs]

**John:** I know. But you like a well-made book.

**Craig:** Oh, sure. I mean in terms of just the quality of a book being put together, yes. Absolutely. No question.

**John:** So we will talk about that. But before we do any of this, Craig we have to start because apparently you have a big thing to apologize for.

**Craig:** Yeah, apparently. I didn’t realize I blew it. I totally blew it. A couple of episodes ago I was talking about how passionate Europeans are about their football and particularly folks in the UK. And I incorrectly assigned the singing of You’ll Never Walk Alone to Mancunians when in fact it is the folks of Liverpool, the Liverpoolians. I’m probably saying that wrong, too.

But it’s Liverpool. The folks of Liverpool are the ones that sing You’ll Never Walk Alone and so what I basically did was award their bitter rivals with their beloved song. This is just a tragic mistake, born out of utter ignorance. Sometimes you know just enough to be dangerous as my father used to say. And in this case I knew just enough to be dangerous. So I do apologize to all of the fans in Liverpool. I did not mean to besmirch your beloved song or your beloved football club.

And similarly I apologize to the folks of Manchester for suggesting that they were like Liverpool fans, since they all apparently hate each other’s teams. But we’re all friends.

**John:** Yeah.

**Craig:** So anyway I do apologize for that. That was just a blunder. It was just a huge blunder.

**John:** And a thing which we talked about before on the show is that one of the most important parts of an apology is accepting an apology, so the many people who have written into the show to point out this error hopefully will accept the apology and then we can move on and try to make another 500 episodes of the show.

**Craig:** Yeah. It would be kind of weird if they didn’t.

**John:** No. We’re going to continue to be angry.

**Craig:** Yeah, you know, I mean, there are worst things in the world. But it was – if somebody, I don’t know, talked with some sense of authority about how the Yankees play at City Field I would have been incensed. So I get it. And I apologize. I am sorry.

**John:** Great. That same episode we talked about in How Would This Be a Movie these professional breakup artists. And so these are folks in Japan who do this for a living. I said that is a good idea for a movie and I would not be surprised if this movie exists somewhere out there in the world. And two of our listeners wrote in saying like, yes, those movies do exist.

Paul wrote in to say that there is a French film called Heartbreaker which is about this idea. And then Fred in Chicago said there’s already an Australian feature about professional breaker-uppers called appropriately The Breaker Upperers. He says it’s pretty good. They go the broad comedy route. It’s sort of like Bridesmaids. It’s produced by Taika Waititi. So I want to see this movie. The trailer is actually great.

**Craig:** I’m not going to do it.

**John:** You’re not going to watch that movie. You don’t watch movies.

**Craig:** Not really. [laughs] I don’t watch stuff anymore.

**John:** But you know the movie now exists out there in the world.

**Craig:** Totally. Breaker Upperers.

**John:** Yeah. But the fact that it was a French and an Australian version does not preclude an American version from being made.

**Craig:** Quite the opposite.

**John:** It’s going to get made.

**Craig:** Yeah.

**John:** Do you want to take Frank’s question here about typos?

**Craig:** Sure. Frank in London wrote in about typos and our decision to stop using Three Page Challenges with typos.

**John:** Now do you remember Frank’s situation here? So Frank had a life experience that made it very difficult for him to read and to write.

**Craig:** Yes. I remember. Frank wrote in and basically said, “Hey, it’s hard for me to write things without typos. You’re being unfair.” And let’s see, it looks like Steve had a comment back. Steve said, “While I also sympathize with Frank’s struggles, I agree that unfortunately in the end those are hurdles he has to overcome. I wanted to add that there are tools to help him that are free or inexpensive, Grammarly for one, that he can Google. There are a ton of them specifically for his particular hurdle, but I like Grammarly because it works with almost every program automatically. You don’t have to open it or copy and paste anything. For the most part it’s just there working.”

John, I want to like Grammarly, but I detest it because of those freaking ads.

**John:** Yeah. I detest it because of the ads, too. So, there are people who really like Grammarly and I think it’s maybe worth someone like Frank in London to consider a tool like that to help him out. But also there’s real people who can do this job, too. So, other listeners suggest that you could go on Fiver or one of these sort of hire a person for a quick little job thing and proofreading is a thing you can get through there. But even our listeners reached out to say like, “Hey, I’m happy to proofread if Frank needs help.”

**Craig:** That’s nice.

**John:** So I would say have faith that there are some humans who are out there to help you do your best writing.

**Craig:** Writing is hard, but it doesn’t have to be. Is that what that lady says?

**John:** I think that’s what it is.

**Craig:** Something like that. And then I just immediately – the red mist descends.

**John:** Now, a few episodes before that in Episode 497 we talked about the hierarchy of genres. So my friend and friend of the show, Matt Byrne, wrote in to say, “I wonder if we’re seeing the relationship between suffering and art/genius here. Van Gough. Sylvia Plath. There’s a trail of examples that goes back to Jesus and the Odyssey, up through De Niro fattening up for Raging Bull. We as a society love and celebrate those bits of suffering. They add value. We see the labor. In comedy the labor is mostly invisible. So while a comedy may delight us more, the artistry seems to come at less of a price. I don’t know if it’s specific to our puritanical roots, or if it’s more global and timeless, but that value on labor and suffering seems to be hardwired into our DNA and certainly ingrained into the awards PR narrative machinery.”

**Craig:** Well that’s a really interesting notion. I appreciate that, Matt. I think you might be onto something there. It is absolutely true that we associate self-torture, or a tortured personality, with great art. And I don’t think that’s good.

**John:** Yeah.

**Craig:** I don’t think we should. I think it encourages a kind of romanticization of what is actually just, you know, unfortunate mental illness. But that’s a really interesting observation. Well done.

**John:** Do you want to take Spooky from Florida here?

**Craig:** Well, of course I do. OK, Spooky from Florida writes, “I often find that people look down on horror, or if it’s a good horror film they deny that it’s in the horror genre altogether. William Friedkin famously said that he didn’t consider The Exorcist to be horror, which seems ridiculous to me. Using Craig’s own criteria there is only one film that definitely fits in the horror genre that has won an Academy Award for Best Film, The Silence of the Lambs.

“Parasite and The Shape of Water each also recently received Best Film, but might take a Friedkin-esque stance and argue they aren’t horror.” Well, I have a suspicion were Jonathan Demme with us today he would also argue that Silence of the Lambs was not horror, either. So this is an interesting parallel. What do you think about Spooky’s point here?

**John:** I think it’s a really good point and it also reminds me of what Tess Morris told us about romantic comedies is that when a rom-com is incredibly successful suddenly it’s not a rom-com anymore. So like Silver Linings Playbook is not considered a rom-com, but of course it is a rom-com. It’s just that they sort of broke out of that bubble and it doesn’t count as that. Or when a man makes a rom-com it’s not considered a rom-com.

**Craig:** Right. Exactly. So Let the Right One In is considered an arthouse film, an independent arthouse film, but it’s a horror movie.

**John:** Yeah.

**Craig:** It’s a really good horror movie. Yeah, I agree. I think Spooky what happens is people have this feeling that genre is somehow a negative.

**John:** Yeah.

**Craig:** But I would say drama is a genre. Weepy Oscar drama, right? Like, you know, Oscar Movie, that’s a thing. We all know what it is, right? If you say, OK, what do you think an Oscar movie is I’m immediately in my mind it’s Sophie’s Choice. That’s what’s happening. It’s a genre.

**John:** Or you look at a movie like The Artist. The Artist didn’t have all that sort of award season movie kind of stuff around it, like the period film and it’s about Hollywood.

**Craig:** It’s a comedy.

**John:** Yeah, it’s a comedy. It’s just a comedy. It’s a very light comedy. But we don’t think about it as just a comedy because it’s an Oscar movie.

**Craig:** Well perception is a fascinating thing. I’ve just been thinking about it a lot lately only because it’s a rare thing in one’s own life to notice a dramatic shift in perception. And perception is – just a source of injustice, sometimes against you and sometimes in your favor.

You know, I think about the way people talk about things that I do. I think they used to be way too hard on me, and now I think they’re way too easy on me.

**John:** [laughs]

**Craig:** Now they’re like, “This show is going to be great because Craig is doing it.” And I’m like, you know, listen man. I’m going to do my best, but I wouldn’t say that. I’m hoping. I’m putting all I can into it. But there is that strange handicapping that occurs, like odds. They minus five points or plus five points depending on how they see you. It’s a curious thing.

**John:** Well speaking of awards and perceptions, the big news out of this past week was that NBC has decided it’s not going to be broadcasting the next Golden Globe awards. So that’s a pretty big shift. That’s a big televised – like the second biggest televised awards show that just goes away. And not just for film but for TV as well. And, see ya. I’m not going to miss it.

You know, some good things about the Golden Globes. I think they’re fun to watch because it’s a bunch of celebrities in a room slightly drunk. And the monologues from the hosts were actually kind of funny in general, had a good mocking tone. But it wasn’t important. It wasn’t meaningful. And the folks who were voting on it had no real skin in the game. So, I’m not sad to see it go.

**Craig:** There are a lot of award shows where the people voting don’t have skin in the game. The critics’ awards and all that. But this is sort of fascinating. The Golden Globes have always had a strange, well, you know, I remember controversy when I was a kid. I didn’t watch award shows when I was a kid, but somehow I heard about Pia Zadora winning the Golden Globe and everybody being like, “The Golden Globes!” But then again the Golden Globes I think were always like you say viewed as a little bit of the kind of chaotic slightly boozy cousin, where things were a bit more fun and casual and I can say from my own experience being there that it is pretty booze and fun and casual.

**John:** Yeah.

**Craig:** We had a great time.

**John:** Absolutely. You and Tiffany Haddish up on stage. It was a good time.

**Craig:** Oh my god. Tiffany Haddish was great and we had our table and we were sitting next to the Succession table and we were cheering each other on while we were all drinking. And so it’s a very different vibe than an auditorium based show like the Emmys or the Oscars where you’re sitting in a seat and you are observing a stage.

So it’s like a big, huge Sweet Sixteen/Bar Mitzvah kind of event. But obviously they ran into real trouble here and I’m curious to see what happens because this doesn’t seem like the kind of thing where someone else is going to pick this football up and resume running with it.

**John:** Well here’s a suggestion from Twitter. So this is Noah Evslin who tweeted, “I’m going to pitch this again…this is the moment for all the Hollywood guilds to come together and create a new awards show called The Guild Awards and use the money to help stabilize their health and pension funds. In 2019, the Golden Globes brought in over $60 million.”

So, I hear you laughing, so therefore let’s take the pro and con on The Guild Awards.

**Craig:** Sure. Well, should I do pro?

**John:** I can do pro because I think you have more cons. Is that fair?

**Craig:** I really have one con. I only have one. But it’s a massive con. So go for your pros.

**John:** OK, my pros is I think the guilds should continue to do their own awards for their own stuff and hold back on Best Picture, Best Screenplay, Best Comedy Series, basically the things that are actually televisable you can hold off on those and let those be sort of the Guild Awards, but do your own local awards for all of the other awards.

But I think there’s an opportunity to create that kind of boozy, smaller, less auditorium-y feel of The Golden Globes but actually have to be voted on by people who do this for a living.

**Craig:** Well, that would pretty much solve the big con. I mean, the strike against this notion which on its surface seems kind of a no-brainer is that the award show would be endless the Writers Guild Awards took I would say most of my life. I think I spent most of my life at that one Writers Guild award show.

**John:** You couldn’t do – and you wouldn’t want to do all the awards. So you should just do the big marquee things.

**Craig:** So then I guess the con junior there is that if you are someone who is not in one of those categories you’re going to – so like for instance the Emmys, there is a craft awards Emmys that occurs–

**John:** The night before.

**Craig:** It’s a week before.

**John:** The week before, yeah.

**Craig:** And they call it the Shemmy’s because it’s not the real Emmys. I mean, it is, you get a real Emmy, but they don’t want to spend time giving Emmys for editing or costume, which they should. Everybody deserves their moment. But, yeah, so I think people might get a little grouchy, like I’m at the WGA, mumble WGA awards.

But if what you did is essentially approximate the kind of awards that the Golden Globes gave out, because they don’t give out a lot of awards, then I mean–

**John:** Yeah, so let directors vote on Best Director. Let writers vote on all the writing awards. Let the actors vote on the actors. It would be great. Do I think it’s going to happen? I think it’s unlikely to happen. I think what’s more likely to happen is that the SAG Awards become increasingly visible, just because they’re actors and they’re famous. But I think the Guild Awards would be lovely and I would watch them and support them.

**Craig:** Yeah. At some point it all comes down to just math and people watch this sort of thing because they like to see the actors. And fewer and fewer people are watching any of these things.

**John:** Yeah.

**Craig:** The trend is not encouraging. So NBC, I can’t quite award them with the bravery of the year medal because the ratings for these things have just been plummeting. What was the most recent–?

**John:** Well the Oscars was not a huge–

**Craig:** Oh, god, yeah, the Oscars. I mean, I looked at the bar graph of viewers, that’s pretty scary stuff.

**John:** Also they had all the challenges of doing the broadcast, like no one had seen those movies at all. And so I think it’s a weird year to compare sort of the down drop. We’ll see what it is next year. If it’s that same number next year then televised award shows are just over.

**Craig:** Yeah. I mean, I was looking, I don’t follow along, so I saw here is what the progress was even prior to the pandemic and that is a steep slow downward.

**John:** Mm-hmm.

**Craig:** Yeah. Not good.

**John:** Not good. All right, let’s get to our marquee topic. I want to talk about patterns of success. And by this I mean that over the years you and I have seen many, many writers. And we’ve seen writers who become really successful and writers who haven’t become especially successful. And I wanted to sort of talk about what patterns we’ve noticed in both of those groups of writers.

So this is just sort of an open-ended conversation, but I feel like it’s something we could come back and visit again in future episodes. The things that we see that are markers of like oh yeah that person has got it, that person has not got it. Because you and I have both said that about people, but what are we actually identifying when we say like, ah yeah, I think that’s going to work for that person.

**Craig:** Well this is a really interesting prompt for a discussion, because longevity in our business is rare. It is rare. There are not many people who are consistently successful. There are people who have moments and then fade away. There are people who feast off of big hits for a while but eventually run out of runway, so to speak. And then there are people who we might put them under the category of their worst enemy.

**John:** For sure.

**Craig:** Where they had almost all the tools required. There was just one problem. So this is a good topic of discussion because I think people think that success in Hollywood comes down to writing that great script or directing that great film, but that’s the beginning of your success.

**John:** Often it is. So let’s talk about what we even mean by success, and this is something we talk about a bit in my other podcast series Launch. We talk about what is success for a novelist. But what do we mean as success for a film or TV writer? Do we mean the ability to make a living at it? Or for people to say like, wow, that’s really good writing? Does it mean winning awards? Does it mean making blockbusters? Is it the ability to make anything you want to make? Is it autonomy? Are you a successful writer if you are a mid-level staffed TV writer?

And for some people, yes, and for some people no.

**Craig:** Yeah. I mean, everyone can define it in a different way. But given the context we’re discussing here I would probably say the ability to make a good living. A good living. I think if it’s a subsistence living, if it’s just barely keeping my head above water it’s hard to argue that that is success per se. Because the people who are living that probably wouldn’t define it that way.

But the ability to make a good living and earn more than you spend and be able to save money, own a home, and save money to send your kids to schools and all that seems like a decent definition here.

**John:** It is, but I also wonder about people who see themselves as artists, people who see themselves as like I need to change the cultural conversation. They may not be so focused on just making a living at it. They may actually have another job that pays the bills but they feel like they’re making art that really matters, that they’re writing movies that matter to them.

So I don’t want to be so narrow in having to achieve a certain economic success as being the only thing that we’re looking at here.

**Craig:** Yeah. I guess if we put the word career in front of success here then it would help narrow that conversation. Because of course if you write a script that you love that means a lot to you and that was your purpose, that’s what you were going for, you win. If your goal is to have a lasting and productive career, then that’s different. So I guess maybe what we should be talking about is, well, I guess we can talk about all of the kinds of successes.

**John:** Absolutely. Well let’s talk about sort of aspects of the professional life and what we see being especially important or not so important. So we’ll start with work habits, because I think that’s the thing that can often be visible. It’s like this is a person who gets up at 6am every day and at their keyboard and banging away. And in your experience does hard work correlate with success?

**Craig:** Yes. I don’t necessarily define hard work as getting up at 6am, because you’re not going to catch me doing that. But at some point sooner or later a quantity of work needs to be completed. And obviously there are two axes you’re operating with. There’s quality and speed and people who are able to maintain a high level of quality at a decent clip are far more likely to have longevity than people who can’t.

**John:** Yeah. I do think of the silent evidence of all the writers who worked much, much harder than me who didn’t make it, and who didn’t break out and sort of weren’t able to have careers. And I can’t know to what degree the problem was quality or some other aspect of their approach that kept them out of what we are trying to define as success. But I think too often there’s this assumption that if you just work harder it’s going to all work out and that’s not been my experience. There’s some correlation of hard work and success, but I don’t think it’s a perfect correlation because there’s people who worked much harder than me who didn’t succeed.

**Craig:** I agree. I think that you cannot hard work your way to success. But you can un-hard work your way out of success, if that makes sense.

**John:** Yes. I think you and I both know people who just could never get the work done. They were talented when they could actually finish a script, but they just couldn’t finish enough scripts.

**Craig:** And that is more tragic to me. If you don’t have the quality then all of the hard work isn’t necessarily going to get you anywhere. But if you do and any variety of reasons sort of is between you and the ability to apply it, that’s a bummer. Because, you know, we are all missing out at that point.

**John:** Let’s talk about social savvy. Do you have to be good in a room?

**Craig:** It helps a lot, but I don’t think it is necessary. There are plenty of writers who were notoriously and perhaps are notoriously not good in rooms.

**John:** Yeah. I think that’s true. I think as things have moved more towards television from features the ability to get along with others and actually sort of have some emotional intelligence in terms of being in a space with others and communicating with others face to face or over Zoom is more important than for the feature writer, but it’s some part of it. It’s different than it would be for a novelist. You have to have some ability to communicate with a human being in front of you.

**Craig:** Yeah. I think that social savvy is required if you’re going to be at the top of the game. If you want to be – now we’re moving past success into just the people who work at the upper level of this career. Almost all of them have some sort of social savvy.

**John:** At the upper tier, yes. There were definitely jobs you and I got because we were the only people who could stand being in a room with some of those people, who could actually navigate those really difficult personalities. That’s just being honest. The rooms were it was like there’s five 800-pound gorillas and it’s just like, OK, I’m in gorilla city and I just have to be able to wrestle all of these gorillas at once.

**Craig:** Somebody has to do an animated version of that.

**John:** Gorilla City.

**Craig:** Gorilla City. And you wrestling all of them at once.

**John:** But let’s remember that an early part of your career is going to be finding a rep, going into those general meetings. The ability to do that stuff is not an unimportant part of how screenwriters get started.

**Craig:** No. Like they always say a pool doesn’t increase the price of your home when you’re selling it, it just makes the home sell faster. And I think that’s the way social savvy works, too. It’s not going to get you a career that you wouldn’t have otherwise gotten, but you’ll get where you’re supposed to go faster.

**John:** Yeah.

**Craig:** Because early on what happens is these people are meeting all these writers and all of those meetings are boring. They’re boring for everybody and they’re particularly boring when you meet somebody and you just don’t feel anything. But if you do feel a connection with another human being suddenly if that human being was you, you are way closer to getting hired than you would have been otherwise.

**John:** Absolutely. I’m thinking to one of my very first general meetings was with an executive by the name of Jan Finger. She was over at Imagine. And they’d gotten the rights to How to Eat Fried Worms, but my meeting wasn’t specifically about that. But it was sort of a “hey, she read my script” and it was just a general meeting. And I liked her and we got along and she got me. And that’s kind of all it took for me to get in that next meeting to get that project.

So, yeah, those connections are important.

**Craig:** They are. And that reality, that human reality, is another reason why it’s really important that on the hiring side of things that there are all sorts of people.

**John:** Exactly.

**Craig:** Because, you know.

**John:** Because it’s not going to be two white people in a room all the time. And, yes, 100 percent.

**Craig:** It’s kind of the deal. It’s just important. Because there are certain connections that people have because they’re from the same place, or from the same background. I mean, there were so many times where I would sit in a room and say, “Oh, I grew up on Staten Island,” and someone was like, “Oh yeah, I grew up in Queens.” And you’re like, huh, great, we’re off and running. You know? Because there’s some sort of thing.

So it’s just good to have all that variety there. But that said, people with social savvy should and do find connections with just about everyone. That’s one of their skills.

**John:** True. Now, getting back to general patterns, let’s talk about originality and voice. We talk about voice in the Three Page Challenges a lot. Craig, do you think it’s more important to have a striking singular voice or to be flexible, the ability to sort of write a lot of different kinds of voices?

**Craig:** I think that you will get more work if you’re flexible and you have an ability to move between genres and also an ability to continue some sort of established voice or expectation. However, that is not necessary. And also I would argue that even if you are the kind of person who can do that sort of thing you then have to be individual and fingerprinted within that. So, I mean I did god knows how many sequels I had to work on. Had to, like somebody had a gun in my mouth.

But I chose to. [laughs]

**John:** I like the other person has a gun in your mouth. Not a gun to your head.

**Craig:** No, in my mouth. So much worse. Because in your head you’re like, eh. Mouth? Oh boy.

**John:** I wouldn’t even see the bullet, but yeah.

**Craig:** Right. So what happens is you’re like I get the drill here. I know what the tone is. I understand what’s been put out. And I can work within those lines. Also, I can do my own thing inside of that that is particular.

**John:** I would say that the people I’ve noticed who have broken out, who have really broken out hard and fast have had original voices. They were just like, oh wow, that is really good. I’ve not seen anything like that before. It feels specific and unique and new. Those people have not always been able to sustain careers because they could kind of do that one thing, or they only did that one thing. Ideally you want to have an original voice and the ability to do a lot of other voices as well.

**Craig:** That’s very helpful.

**John:** How important is copying? So we talk about visual artists. One of the big debates is how much do you need to perfect doing every tree individually versus understanding when it’s the right time to copy and just fill in that background with things you’ve done before? To what degree do you need to be making brand new original stuff all the time or understand what the genre is and just be able to deliver that genre?

**Craig:** Well, there are times where you realize you’re being hired to do a thing. I have always tried to add some sort of value regardless. I know there are times where I’m complicating, or in the past at least. Now that I’m pretty much working on things that are mine, so it’s all my fault now. But when I was working on things for other people I was aware at times that I was making it harder on myself than I needed to, but I have to believe that in the long run you are rewarded for that. That they ask you sometimes for counterfeits, but when they get them they don’t like them as much as things that feel original.

**John:** Yeah. I fully get what you’re saying there. It’s like they’re asking you to make the cheap knockoff and you’re like but it’s actually going to be easier and better if I just make something original here. Like, no, no, we want the cheap knockoff. And I can think of writers who basically all they do is just cheap knockoffs and at a certain point they stopped getting hired because everything that they’ve actually gotten made has been cheap knockoffs and is just clearly cheap knockoffs. It’s not good for your long term career to be doing those.

**Craig:** It’s not. And the bigger problem is there’s no path ahead. If you are in that lane it’s going to pay you pretty well for a while, but at some point they’re going to wise up and go, “Whoa, whoa, whoa, wait a second. We’re spending too much on the knockoff guy. The whole point of the knockoff guy was that we didn’t want to spend money on the original guy. Now we’re spending too much money on the knockoff guy. Find me a cheaper knockoff guy.” And they will.

**John:** Yup. How important is it to be able to embrace constraints? The phrasing I’m saying it actually is incredibly important. But I’ve noticed that the ones who succeed can kind of understand what the constraints are and thrive under those constraints. And the ones who tend to struggle, they struggle against the form of the constraints, or the budget, or whatever. They get paralyzed. They can’t do the thing they want to do the way they want to do it.

**Craig:** Well, this to me connects strangely to a necessary element of empathy. You are hired by people to do something. And what we’re asked to do is hard. It’s hard for us to do it. And we have all sorts of feelings when we’re doing it. And I think a lot of writers have tunnel vision where that’s all they see. And the other people, the people that hired them, aren’t really people or are far too comfortable, and their feelings don’t matter. Well they do. Part of that empathy is putting yourself in everybody else’s shoes and trying to see things from their point of view. So when they put these restraints down, or constraints I should say, and they have certain things they need, a little bit of empathy goes a long way. Even if you’re arguing against it. Because you’re arguing against it while acknowledging that it is a perfectly reasonable thing to want. That is helpful.

Maybe even more than just going along with things is taking the effort to see things from other people’s point of view. Then either accept the constraints as reasonable or talk about why maybe they should go a different way.

**John:** Yeah. I can think of an example of like, OK, I want to do a gritty crime show and they’re like, “We love your writing. Our mandate is now we want to do blue sky, happy, sunny. We want dark things in beautiful environments. So can you take your gritty crime show and set it in the Florida sunshine?” And you could say absolutely no, that’s not a thing I want to do at all, or you could say like sure, I get what that is, I get what your mandate is. I can make it work. And I can use the tension between those two things to step up to the next level. That is the kind of thing that tends to make people more successful and have longer careers is to say like, oh, yeah, OK, I get that, and this is a thing I can change that will let me make this thing happen.

**Craig:** And it’s important to have a realistic view of what it is you’re working on. Because if you’re working on a crime procedural for say a basic cable channel then certain things – you got to know where you are, right? You’re in a certain kind of restaurant, and so you’ve kind of got to go along there. I think that this discussion that we’re having will be viewed by some people as a justification for some kind of selling out.

I think if you want to talk about one of the things that separates successful writers from writers who burn out it’s that writers who burn out, or don’t get there at all, are obsessed with this whole selling out business.

**John:** Mm-hmm.

**Craig:** There is no selling out. Everybody is constantly making compromises. You don’t know how to make anything in this business without compromising. Directors know that, right? They know that. Every day is a war to limit the compromises. But they are constant because reality is reality. It intrudes.

Writers, because we have total control over what goes on the page, we have this delusion that there’s some pristine relationship between that and what comes out the other end. And any kind of compromise or negotiation is a failure of will and conviction, it is an indication of artistic failure, and it’s selling out. And that attitude gets your ass booted out of town faster than any other one.

**John:** Yeah. I feel like sometimes these writers they want to be both Charlie Kaufman and Greg Berlanti. They want the huge giant career, making thousands of shows, and to sort of be completely unyielding and singular in a vision at all times. And those aren’t compatible goals really.

**Craig:** I mean, I would argue, and maybe Charlie will come on our show. Because I suspect that Charlie as he’s making his films runs into moments most days when he’s shooting where he does have to kind of just adjust, or in the editing room he realizes he’s got to move a thing this way or that. Everybody is doing it.

**John:** Everyone is doing it. If you watched – you didn’t watch – I’m Thinking of Ending Things, we could watch that and like I don’t feel he compromised that much. I felt like he had a very singular vision and made that singular vision.

**Craig:** So here’s the thing. That’s because what he makes is unique.

**John:** Yeah.

**Craig:** It will always seem like it is the product of zero compromise, but it’s not.

**John:** That’s true.

**Craig:** When you read stories about what Francis Ford Coppola was going through and dealing with when he was making Godfather, it’s like well surely he didn’t compromise ever. Oh my god, yes he did. Yes he did. Quite a bit. You know, it’s what you do.

**John:** Let’s talk about taste. I think an important thing is to be able to understand what is good writing and what is not good writing, especially when it applies to what transfers to the screen. The ability to have good taste on the page and seeing how that taste applies to the screen. And that match between your taste and what an audience’s taste is is crucial.

**Craig:** Yeah. And that’s kind of magic. I mean, there’s no way to quantify that. It is an essential part of what we call talent, I think. There’s talent in creating something. There’s also talent in predicting with some level of accuracy how it will be felt by other people. Because that is the job. Anybody who is creating any art with no concern or prediction or thought about the audience’s reaction is, well I just don’t believe it.

Because that means there’s no intention. And there’s always intention.

**John:** I want to play this clip from Ira Glass where he’s talking about taste and how he finds that there’s often this gap between you have taste, but you don’t have the craft yet. Let’s listen to what Ira Glass says.

**Ira Glass:** Somebody had told this to me, is that all of us who do creative work, you know, we get into it. And we get into it because we have good taste. But it’s like there’s a gap. That for the first couple years that you’re making stuff, what you’re making isn’t so good. It’s not that great. It’s trying to be good. It has ambition to be good, but it’s not quite that good. But your taste, the thing that got you into the game, your taste is still killer. And your taste is good enough that you can tell that what you’re making is kind of a disappointment to you. Do you know what I mean?

A lot of people never get past that phase. A lot of people at that point they quit. And the thing I would just say to you with all my heart is that most everybody I know who does interesting creative work they went through a phase of years where they had really good taste, they could tell what they were making wasn’t as good as what they wanted it to be. They knew it fell short. It didn’t have the special thing that we wanted it to have. And the thing I would say to you is everybody goes through that. And for you to go through it, if you’re going through it right now, if you’re just getting out of that phase, you got to know it’s totally normal. And the most important possible thing you could do is do a lot of work.

Do a huge volume of work. Put yourself on a deadline so that every week or every month you know you’re going to finish one story. Because it’s only by actually going through a volume of work that you’re actually going to catch up and close that gap. And the work you’re making will be as good as your ambitions.

**John:** So I think back to when I was at USC for film school and one of the great resources that we had was a film library, so I could check out all of these screenplays and just go through and read these great scripts. And my writing was not as good as these scripts. And I recognized that it wasn’t as good as these scripts, but for whatever reason I wasn’t afraid of that. I aspired to hit that level and I kept working to get to that level.

People sometimes get crushed with self-doubt where they just don’t – they recognize that they’re not at that level and they don’t think they can actually get there. And so I like that Glass is pointing out that it’s often just to work to get yourself up to that level of polish.

**Craig:** If you had told me that that was an interview with Chris Keyser I would have believed you. They sound so similar.

**John:** They really do. That’s a good point.

**Craig:** So weird. So, yeah, this is a terrific observation and it’s something that somebody else had sent me a while ago, because it’s one of those things when you read it you’re like, or you listen to it and you go, oh of course, I mean, it’s so obvious and yet it had been kind of floating right there right under my consciousness.

I think that the reality of what he’s describing is one of the reasons I’m so angry all the time at critics. Because everyone who eventually gets to do something good is working through the gap. And while they’re working through the gap there are people who are brutalizing them in print and suggesting you’re never going to get there. Stop. Quit. You stink.

And I wish that would not happen. Because I do think there are probably people who left too soon who were one or two things away from kind of putting it all together. Scott Frank said something to me many years ago that seemed a bit dramatic at the time, but in hindsight was absolutely correct. And that was, he was reading something I’d written and he said, “The thing is you have yet to be really born as a writer.” And I was like well that’s very dramatic. [laughs] That’s a very, very dramatic statement. I’ve been working at this for 15 years Scott. I make a pretty good living.

But his point was that I hadn’t sort of become myself yet. And that maybe you could argue that that’s part of being in the gap. Not only is there a mismatch between your taste and your work, but also there is perhaps not enough of your own self in the work. Because the work that is available almost always has zero interest in who you are.

**John:** Absolutely. I hadn’t really thought about your career in terms of taste, but I would say that you’ve always had much better taste than the movies that we saw your name on.

**Craig:** Well, I mean, some of those movies I love. So my taste actually isn’t that great.

**John:** The breadth of your taste extended well beyond the movies, the kinds of movies that you were making.

**Craig:** Yeah. If you looked at the movies I was making it was easy enough and reasonable enough to conclude that I was a goof.

**John:** Yeah.

**Craig:** Some of those movies I really do hold close to my heart and some I definitely do not. And you know some were just work. But I at least for better or worse suffered through quite a lot of public humiliation, even as I was successful. And I really wish I could sit down one on one with each one of those people and explain to them why what they did was harm. And unnecessary, by the way. It’s totally unnecessary. You can absolutely not like a movie but the personal part of it is so anti-art is I guess how I would put it.

You don’t realize it, but you say you love film, you don’t if that’s what you’re doing.

**John:** Yeah. Let’s get back to the choices of what kinds of projects you’re working on and how many projects you’re sort of pursuing. Because a choice I’ve seen writers make is they have some success and they just take anything that comes their way. And there’s the temptation to never say no because you don’t know where your next job is, but I’ve also seen the opposite where people just say no to everything and then people stop asking them to the dance.

**Craig:** Yeah.

**John:** And so it’s that balance between saying yes enough that you’re still engaged as a writer, but not pursuing too much, or pursuing junk, or just becoming overcommitted and then just failing because we both know writers who just collapsed under that.

**Craig:** I was talking with Todd Philips about this. It was after he did The Hangover and it was a massive success. And maybe he was talking to Martin Scorsese. And Martin Scorsese, I’m just going to say he was, because that makes the story way cooler, but I think it was him. And he was telling Martin Scorsese that his world had changed because he had made The Hangover and suddenly he was getting sent everything, all sorts of things. And people were offering him the biggest possible things and he was sort of paralyzed and thinking that maybe he was just going to take time.

And then Martin Scorsese said, “The best advice I can give you is after you have a huge hit of any kind, a big success, jump right back on the horse, as fast as you can. Because if you don’t then the weight of that success grows and becomes almost an unbearable load. Because you’re never going to be able to beat that.” You can’t do that again. And so sometimes you actually have to just do something.

**John:** Yeah.

**Craig:** And maybe it’s the wrong choice, but doing nothing for too long becomes its own kind of dangerous addiction. And you’re absolutely right. Sooner or later people are going to be like, huh, wait, we forgot about you. And no one wants that.

**John:** Yeah. We should revisit this topic in a few episodes and I want to look at what we’ve noticed never works and sort of what are the pattern of like please don’t do this thing. Because even what you’re describing in terms of like the writer who has a big hit and then just like becomes paralyzed or fearful of doing anything else, or over-celebrates that one thing, I think we’re going to find quite a few of those things that could actually be useful for our listeners.

**Craig:** All right. I agree.

**John:** All right. Let’s get to listener questions and now over the last few weeks we’ve all enjoyed hearing from Oops and the romantic adventures of Oops. And Megana has another question for us today that is not an Oops situation. I’ve got to preface this by saying this is about as opposite of Oops as we could imagine.

**Craig:** Anti-Oops.

**John:** It’s anti-Oops, but I also feel like it’s a good season opener because I feel like we’re going to revisit this topic down the road. Megana, come on and tell us the story of Shocked.

**Craig:** Oh boy.

**Megana Rao:** All right. Shocked in LA wrote in about his friend. “Like many aspiring writers a close and talented friend of mine, a lady in her late 20s started her career at an agency. She quickly left and found work in production while pursuing her ambition of writing. She has a few great scripts under her belt and a couple we even wrote together. One of her friends from the agency was promoted this past year and agreed to represent her.

“A few months ago she gets a call from her boss from that agency, a 70-year-old man. He’s upset that she hid her writing ambitions from him. He asks her out to dinner to discuss her career. She was thrilled. He has a ton of industry pull and can really help her. But, he was a very difficult boss who put her through all sorts of inappropriate behavior, from commenting on her looks, to sharing sexual imagery in the office.

“Surprise, surprise, the dinner turned out to not be about her writing. He wants to explore their sexual connection. It was a stereotypical #MeToo moment. He told her that she shouldn’t have a boyfriend if she’s serious about writing and should have a casual sexual relationship with him instead. It was extremely demoralizing and degrading for her. He continued harassing her, basically chasing her out of the parking lot, but she was able to safely make it home.

“But here’s the thing. She’s still a baby writer, no credits or awards, repped at the same agency this guy works at. He’s her agent’s boss and seems pretty powerful. She’s afraid to even tell her agent what happened because of all the implications. However, I’m scared that he will have access to her if she stays at that agency. What if he terrorizes and sexually harasses her this way? Or destroys her career?

“My friend knows how hard it is to get represented in Hollywood. Although she has a manager, she doesn’t want to let go of her rep. But I think this baby agent has very little power anyways. He’s never even sent her on a general. My friend is also afraid to take on her powerful ex-boss/sexual harasser and certainly doesn’t want to be branded by this before anyone has even seen her work.

“What can I do to help her and what can she do to help herself?”

**John:** Ugh. All right. So much here. First off, we’re going to talk about Shocked. We think Shocked is a man. We’re guessing Shocked is a man, so we’re going to refer to this friend – the person who is writing this letter as Shocked. And the woman as the person who is going through this horrible situation.

This sucks. And so my first instinct was I don’t know what to do this, and so what I do in this case is I ask really smart friends. So I reached out to six of my smart female writer friends to get their take on what the right steps were. But before we get into that, Craig, what’s your first read on the situation?

**Craig:** Oh man. Well, so this is an interesting situation where I think while I want to tell Shocked’s friend to draw her flaming sword and slay the dragon, it’s so easy for me to say that. And it’s not so easy to do it. I do believe that in today’s day and age everybody has quite a bit more power than they used to. I mean, they used to have zero and now they have quite a bit in the sense that all she has to do is pick up the phone and call Deadline and this guy is in massive trouble.

But, she’s right to understand that that comes at some sort of cost. Given that the agent she has at this agency is not a bigshot. So Shocked describes this agent as a baby agent who has very little power and has never set this woman up on a general meeting, I don’t think there would too much lost if she walked from that agency and went maybe to try at a different agency, clean break, and see if she could find somebody else. That is I would call it the path of least resistance, because it doesn’t seem like you’d be losing much.

The path of greater resistance is to bring this incident to the attention of the board of directors at that agency.

**John:** So in talking with the six women yesterday one of the points that came up again and again is that the big moves are great in theory, but they don’t necessarily help the woman. So going out with a flaming sword or going to Deadline or one of those things, that’s not necessarily going to help her.

**Craig:** Right.

**John:** And so what we really want to do is help her. What is the thing that helps her in this moment? The thing that was universal across this was to write it down. And both Shocked needs to write down everything that he remembers about this conversation he had with her. He needs to encourage her to write this all down, so she has it on paper. So if she decides to do something she has it down on paper that this is what happened. And that she has evidence if she decides to use it at some point about what happened.

Almost everybody I spoke with said she should leave this agency, and that included an agent I spoke with saying that this agent is not getting you work, this agent is not powerful, this junior agent you’re dealing with. You should leave because if you don’t trust going to this agent necessarily with this issue, like how can you trust this rep? How can this person actually represent you if you can’t even tell them that their boss is doing this?

You have to leave that agency. And you already have a manager. Just leave. There’s no reason to stick around.

**Craig:** Yeah. I think so. And if there is a desire in a very pro-social way to prevent this man from doing this to other people by calling him out, that is something that Shocked’s friend should only do through a lawyer. This is also a moment where I think you want to lawyer up.

**John:** We have some resources on that as well. So you may want to lawyer up, but people I spoke with recommended Time’s Up is not the right place to go to. Women in Film may be the right hotline for your call. Because this is actually kind of what they do is people who had these situations to talk through, OK, let’s deal with the trauma that you’re actually encountering right now and let’s see if there’s other women who have had similar reports. Let’s see if there’s some grouping of action that could make sense here, so it’s not just you against this 60-year-old man.

You are at the start of your career, he’s at the end of his career, and just remember that through all of this is that he’s almost out the door and you’re just coming in.

**Craig:** Right. I think that even if Shocked’s friend doesn’t have an intention to launch missiles, it’s still good to talk to a lawyer, even if all you get out of that is an understanding of what you’re supposed to write down. What are the details that matter? What are you supposed to write down? What are you supposed to save? And what do you do if you turn a corner and here’s there? What do you do if he leaves a message or he texts you?

Having a lawyer advise you at least on some best principles there would be a good thing. But that is a good point. As a 60-plus-year-old man not only is he going to be out of the business while you’re still in the business, assuming that your career flourishes, you’ll be working and he’ll be dead.

**John:** Yeah.

**Craig:** So if you want revenge there is that one revenge which is you dance on their grave. But this really sad and infuriating. And it’s sad and infuriating that this guy still feels protected enough by the world that he’s pulling this crap.

**John:** That – I want to spend a moment here. Because this is a man, a 60-year-old man in 2021 who somehow has been able to – this person obviously opens Deadline. This person can see in the world like what has happened to a person like him again, and again, and again, and still thinks like, oh, I’m special, I’m different, this is not going to happen to me. The hubris. The arrogance of this guy.

I mean, in addition to the shitty behavior he’s doing to this woman, just that he believes the rules that have taken down all these other people do not apply to him drives me mad.

**Craig:** Not only that, but he believes that the rule that 20-year-old women generally aren’t attracted to 60-year-old men also doesn’t apply.

**John:** Yes.

**Craig:** So like he’s in a deep deluded state. I’m 50. I can’t believe that my 51-year-old wife still finds me attractive. [laughs] So I don’t know what this dude is smoking. I guess he’s just smoking his own ego, and his own arrogance. And, also, let’s face it. This business has entitled him. He doesn’t pull this crap if it hasn’t worked before.

**John:** Yeah. And so obviously it’s important to acknowledge that you are not the first person he has done this to, obviously. And so it’s not your responsibility to take up the sword for all the other people, but remember that you are not the only person. So there’s nothing special about you. This is his pattern of doing this that has gotten us into this situation.

Some other advice I got from the women I spoke to is for Shocked make sure you don’t infantilize this woman. She is a grown woman who can make her own decisions. And she actually has more agency in this situation than she may realize. So you can encourage her, but don’t box her into a situation. Don’t tell her she has to do something, because she doesn’t have to do anything. She can choose what is the appropriate step for her to take.

This person also said useful advice might be you don’t want to be a side character in someone else’s story. And so if she thinks of herself as the protagonist in this story, like screw this guy. This guy did a bad thing. And it’s up to her to decide what she wants to do about this next step. But the important part is it’s up to her and she doesn’t have to let him drive the narrative from this point forward.

**Craig:** Yeah. I think Shocked is being a good friend. I think good friends want to help and they want to find out what they can do to help. And maybe this is help. I don’t know. Maybe this is hurt. You know? Because the other issue is if this woman is like, wait, you put my shit on Scriptnotes? That would be bad. So hopefully this was something that they discussed. Obviously we’ve anonymized everything quite extensively here.

**John:** Yes.

**Craig:** I think at a minimum let’s get to super practical stuff. Super practical stuff makes absolute sense that she would leave the agency. And that when you leave the agency also, Shocked’s friend, lawyer. Don’t leave the agency by you calling and going through a weird, awkward conversation with your agent.

**John:** No. The manager can do this as well.

**Craig:** Yes.

**John:** Many of the women said your manager just tells the agency, “You know what? She doesn’t want to be repped there anymore.” And that’s it. It’s done.

**Craig:** I would actually still advise lawyer. And here’s why.

**John:** OK.

**Craig:** Managers cannot be trusted completely in this regard. They have a deep conflict of interest.

**John:** All right.

**Craig:** Lawyers are governed by a higher authority. The State Bar. And their attorney/client privilege. And ethics. And all that stuff. And a lawyer, you can tell your lawyer anything. Anything. And it’s confidential.

You can’t say that about a manager. They can blab your crap anywhere they want. So, I would say lawyer. Clean break. Have the lawyer communicate that. Make it nice and simple and final. And then, yeah, moving on.

**John:** So, the Women in Film hotline 855-WIF-LINE. Or it’s womeninfilm.org is the organization. So we’ll have a link to that in the show notes.

Obviously, Shocked, if you want to keep us apprised to sort of what this person decides to do in the future we’d love to hear about it, and of course I’m sure we’ll get plenty of emails in from folks with their opinions what to do.

Megana, I’m curious to hear your opinion on this as a writer in her 20s. What was your first instinct on this and where do you see this shaking out?

**Megana:** Yeah, I mean, it was really upsetting to read. And I think last month when things started opening up after the pandemic we saw all of those horrible mass shootings. And this past week, or past couple of weeks I think as LA has opened up and people are returning to their offices I’ve just been reading so many horrible, and hearing these stories about women and assistants who are continuing to have these #MeToo type stories.

You know, it’s just like a very sad sobering reminder that these issues were not solved and they have not gone away. But we’re all just forced to be away from each other for a year. But now that the world is opening back up we have to figure out a way to fix them. The problems haven’t gone away and it’s just really disheartening to be reminded of these things that we were dealing with pre-pandemic and where we are now.

**Craig:** Yeah.

**John:** That’s such a good point. It pushed them aside because we were literally not in offices for them to happen. But now they’re back.

**Craig:** You kind of want to hope that it’s also not a case where there’s this weird pent up aggression that’s going to emerge and that we’re going to go through a period where it’s even worse. I hope that’s not the case. But one thing that we always have to keep in mind is we cannot applaud ourselves constantly for the progress that’s been made because the progress will never be perfection. And there is always going to be this stuff going on. Because we can’t pre-crime these things. We can’t get ahead of them.

**John:** Yeah.

**Craig:** They’re going to happen. And dealing with all of that and how we handle those situations, it is going to continue to put young women in particular in very difficult positions, put women of all ages in very difficult positions. That’s going to keep happening. We hope less and less. But no one should be surprised that this is continuing.

**John:** Yeah.

**Megana:** Yeah.

**John:** One last point I want to make, and someone brought up as I spoke to them yesterday, is that I think we still have this vision of agencies being super powerful and sort of like the Mike Ovitz model. And I think agents can help you. I really don’t think they can hurt you that much. And so I think her rejecting this guy is not going to hurt her. I don’t think agents actually have that power in 2021 the way we might have mythologized them before.

I don’t think her leaving the agency is going to hurt her career because it hasn’t helped her career.

**Craig:** Right. Yeah, from a practical point of view the agent that just got promoted from off a desk, yeah, that’s not necessarily the best person in the world. I mean—

**John:** Megana, I cut you off. What were you going to say?

**Megana:** Oh, I think I was just going to say to answer your earlier question, the thing that also makes me so sad about this is like this woman has had something really horrible and discouraging happen to her, and following up on our conversation about patterns of success, like she now has all this self-doubt and anxiety about the value of her actual work. And then she has to be the one to advocate for herself. Oh my god. It’s such a difficult standard for us to keep and for us to expect people who have been abused to be able to do that. It just breaks my heart.

**John:** Yeah.

**Craig:** It is one of the more insidious aspects of this that we don’t talk about enough. And that is that people start to question whether or not they’re good at all.

**John:** Yeah.

**Craig:** It’s something that Megan Ganz spoke about, well, with her typical clarity and intelligence when she had her experience being harassed and abused by Dan Harmon. One of the things that hurt that most was being unsure of whether or not her position on that writing staff was because of her skill. And that is crushing. That is a stomach-churning thing to think. The face I have? I’ve never had to wonder. If somebody was going to give me something it was because of the work. It certainly wasn’t because of my appearance, or how they felt about me romantically.

And I’ve never had to ask myself that question. I’ve never had to contemplate whether or not I was being hoodwinked and gas lit.

**John:** Yeah. Two of the women I spoke with yesterday they related so strongly to this story because they had had very similar things happen and their response from 20 years ago was just like, OK, well I’ll just move on and I’ll just suppress it and I’ll move on. And I do think there’s an opportunity now to – if this woman chooses to – to address this and stop it if she wants to rather than just having to say like suppress it and pretend it didn’t happen.

**Craig:** Well, we are certainly hoping the best. And if you can, therapy, and talking to a professional about these things now I think is always advisable.

**John:** Agreed. All right. It is time for One Cool Things. I have two One Cool Things this week. The first is an HGTV series called Home Town Takeover which sends a big HGTV crew to Wetumpka, Alabama to do a bunch of makeovers around the town. Wetumpka, Alabama is where we shot Big Fish. It’s where the house in Big Fish is. And one of the houses they remodel is the Big Fish house. And so it was so surreal and wonderful to see – our first day of shooting was at the Big Fish house. And to see them refurbishing and remodeling this house.

What they kind of say on the show, but they don’t make entirely clear, is that house is really kind of just one story and we stuck a fake second story on the top of it. But it was never really meant to stay. And we were supposed to take it all down and the owner said, “No, no, just leave it up.” But it was never meant to be livable.

And so the crew had to go through and jerry rig to sort of make it actually livable space. But it was so cool to see both that house but also that town and to realize if I hadn’t written the movie Big Fish that wouldn’t have happened. It was just a weird connection to like, oh, this series exists because I decided to adapt this book into this movie. So it was a really weird thing to see. But actually a really well done HGTV series. So I recommend you check that out if you like those kind of shows, or if you like Big Fish and you can see that.

My second One Cool Thing is Standard Ebooks. And so Project Gutenberg has the text of a zillion books that you can download for free which is great, but it’s not lovely formatted text. It’s not as good to read as a Kindle book might be or a printed book might be. What Standard Ebooks does is they produce a collection of these high quality really well-formatted, accessible, open source, free public domain ebooks. And they’re really good.

So, just go to their site, standardbooks.org/ebooks and you can download basically all the great classics, but really good versions of them. So if you’re looking for those try Standard Ebooks.

**Craig:** You know what? I don’t need a One Cool Thing. You had two.

**John:** I gave you two.

**Craig:** We’re good.

**John:** But, here’s a One Cool Thing you can do is on Episode 500 we said that we desperately need to go back to a segment called Change Craig’s Mind. But we need to figure out how we’re going to change – what’s a topic we can change Craig’s mind about? So if you have suggestions of things you’ve heard him say that you think, no, that’s wrong and we can get him to change his mind, we’ll see. And we can try over the course of this next season to change his mind about anything.

**Craig:** It’s possible. It’s possible.

**John:** Well, Craig, I know you hate mayonnaise. Could we change your mind about mayonnaise?

**Craig:** Oh my god, no. That would be just an utter waste of time. It would be a waste of a segment. That is disgusting.

**John:** Aversion therapy. But we need to find another mayonnaise, something Craig doesn’t really like–

**Craig:** It’s the word.

**John:** Maybe the sense that you don’t like it because you don’t kind of like get it. And then you get it and you’re like, oh yeah, it turns out I do like that.

**Craig:** I mean, it’s possible. Lately I have been watching more ventriloquism.

**John:** Yeah. Absolutely. Late at night he fires up the iPad by the side of the bed.

**Craig:** I make myself a mayonnaise sandwich and sit down and enjoy a fun evening of ventriloquism. Absolutely not.

**John:** My brother grew up on mayonnaise sandwiches. That was his go-to sandwich.

**Craig:** Oh god. Geez.

**John:** Wonder Bread and mayonnaise.

**Craig:** Ugh. Man, that is white.

**John:** Nothing else.

**Craig:** Good lord, that’s white.

**John:** So white.

**Craig:** White.

**John:** Mm-hmm.

**Craig:** White. That’s so white it’s white.

**John:** Scriptnotes is produced by Megana Rao. It is edited by Matthew Chilelli. Our outro this week is by Brian Ramos. If you have an outro you can send us a link to ask@johnaugust.com. That’s also the place where you can send longer questions. For short questions on Twitter I’m @johnaugust.

We have t-shirts and they’re great. You can find them at Cotton Bureau. You’ll find the show notes for this episode and all episodes at johnaugust.com. That’s also where you find the transcripts and sign up for the weekly-ish newsletter called Inneresting, which has lot of links to things about writing.

You can sign up to become a premium member at Scriptnotes.net where you get all the back episodes and bonus segments. That’s also where you can sign up to get updates on the Scriptnotes book. And we’ll be sending out an update this week about where we’re at with the book. Craig, Megana, thank you so much for a fun show.

**Craig:** Thanks guys.

**Megana:** Thank you guys.

[Bonus segment]

**John:** All right, Craig, so the Scriptnotes book, we think it’s going to be actually a pretty hefty book because there’s just a lot of material in there. And I’m curious what you look for in a physical printed book. What are things that excite you about books? What are printed books that you’ve especially liked over the course of your career?

**Craig:** Well, for most fiction I don’t care because I’m just reading. I just want to turn pages. So the quality of a paperback, or even a hard cover book is not particularly important to me. But when it’s a book about a topic, something real, or a book that’s meant to be educational, a few things stick out.

I like size. I like the book to be larger. Because I think it gives you more detail. I really like mixed media. I like the idea of images. There was a book I had as a kid that was more than just images of course. I think it might have been published by World Book. And it was about the universe. And there were plastic overlays and there were sort of grown up versions of popup book style stuff, where you’re moving tabs and turning wheels and things to actually accentuate whatever the value of the imagery was. And then photographs of real things.

I like to engage, feel like I’m kind of involved with the book. You know, play with it a little bit.

**John:** Yeah. I also really love books that I can sort of pick up and flip to any page. Like for nonfiction books, that I can just flip to any page and find something interesting. I think the reason why I loved my D&D books so much growing up is you could just flip to any page in there and it was interesting. And you didn’t have to read them from the start to the end at all. It’s just join at any point.

I also really loved – Peanuts had these great sort of encyclopedia things. They were these colorful things about space and the world. And I loved those too growing up because you just flipped to anything and you’d just find interesting articles. So you could join them at any point in the middle of the story.

**Craig:** Yeah. I mean, there’s a kind of a book fetishization where people are really into the binding and the edges. You know, there’s like the ruffled edges.

**John:** Oh yeah. I hate them.

**Craig:** Yeah. I don’t like the ruffled edges. It looks like your book got stuck in something.

**John:** I hate gilded edges as well. Because they were sharp on my fingers.

**Craig:** Ah, yeah, nothing says luxury like gold-tipped pages. Uh-huh. I just want the book to not fall apart. That’s really all I’ve ever asked for. I don’t really care about that other stuff. I’m not a book fetishist.

A similar problem with NFTs where I’m really struggling just to understand why people are doing it. And like similarly when people – I have a first edition of this thing and I’m like, yeah, but the value of that thing is not the object.

**John:** No.

**Craig:** It’s like saying I have first edition CD of this – who cares? It’s plastic. It doesn’t matter.

**John:** Yeah.

**Craig:** It’s the content that matters. So I don’t get too wrapped up in the whole booked-y thing.

**John:** Do you like book jackets or the ones where it is printed directly on the cover?

**Craig:** Interesting. Ever since I was a kid, first thing that I do is take that off.

**John:** Yeah, I don’t like book jackets either. I don’t take the jacket off, because I don’t want to lose it, but I also don’t like it. I like them for being able to use them as a bookmark. I will use those to sort of mark what page I’m at.

**Craig:** I was a dog-earer. Still am a dog-earer. I know I’m not supposed to. It’s like wrong.

**John:** It’s a crime.

**Craig:** Crime, whatever, against this inanimate object. But ever since I was a kid I would – my fingers would be the color of whatever the cover was because the cover was often some sort of red or blue.

**John:** Yeah, cloth.

**Craig:** Right. And so when you take the dust jacket off your fingers – Megana, cover on/cover off?

**Megana:** No, no, no. I always do cover off. Because I always tear it.

**Craig:** Oh that’s interesting. So you’re reading violently.

**John:** She’s a violent reader.

**Craig:** Wow.

**John:** There’s an increasing trend towards the jacketless books where the artwork is printed directly on the book itself. And I just like that. Sometimes it doesn’t look as neat on the shelf, but who cares what’s on the shelf? What actually looks good in your hands and sitting on a table is more useful to me. And it’s one less thing to lose. I don’t want to lose a thing. I don’t want to rip it. I don’t Megana ripping my book covers.

**Craig:** Right.

**John:** Megana housesits for me. I don’t want to come back and all the book covers are ripped.

**Megana:** I also borrow a lot of your books, with your permission.

**Craig:** Oh. I thought you were just admitting grand theft bookery.

**John:** So Craig two recent books – and the Scriptnotes book will not be anywhere near this size, or epicness, but the Art & Arcana book, we talked about it in the opening, was really sort of a remarkable feat of history and all the artwork throughout the ages. That was a book that you want to keep and you want to sort of, you know, again, you can flip through it. I think I did read it straight through, but you could also just go to any point in the middle of the story.

**Craig:** Those are wonderful books, especially for people who are already into a thing. And there are areas like that where, you know, sports in particular. And I should have mentioned Michael Witwer who also worked on – it wasn’t just Kyle. But if you are into something then – and you know that other people are into it you have an opportunity to do something different.

I’m a baseball fan and every Christmas – I say Christmas even though it was boring Chanukah – I would get oh we got you a book about the Yankees. And there’s like 4,000 books about the Yankees. And most of them are just bad. Because they’re just the same old crap. And they’re literally made for stupid Christmas presents. They weren’t actually made to be loved.

So, try and make something that – if you’re a bookmaker–

**John:** Yeah. We’re bookmakers now. So we’re going to try to make something that people will love. Hey, what is your opinion of the ribbon inside books? The bookmark ribbon?

**Craig:** [laughs]

**John:** You don’t like it?

**Craig:** I hate it.

**John:** You do? All right. Because I’m a big fan. In our sample artwork we have the ribbon, so I guess you’ll have to rip that out.

**Craig:** Megana, if you say that your problem with the ribbon is that it tears then we know you are reading these books in far too aggressive fashion. Are you a ribboner or a non-ribboner?

**Megana:** I like the ribbon, but I’ve been reading books on my Kindle through the pandemic and I recently got a book in paper, or like a physical book, and I have so many papercuts on my hands. I’m like what is wrong with me?

**Craig:** Yeah. What is wrong with you? [laughs]

**John:** She’s both too strong and too fragile.

**Craig:** Normally I’m really supportive of your position, but I’m concerned that you’re reading books incorrectly.

**Megana:** Yeah, I don’t know.

**Craig:** What’s happening?

**John:** What is happening? I will say that I love a big book, but sometimes the book is just so big it’s uncomfortable to read. And so I just got the Ultimate Sandman, because I’d never read Sandman. And I was like I’ve got to read Sandman. So I read Ultimate Sandman which collects the first run of Sandman. And it’s great and it’s oversized so it’s actually much easier to read and you can see the artwork better. It’s just terrifically well done. But man it is heavy. So it’s a thing you cannot read – you can kind of read it on your lap, but you certainly could not read it laying down. It’s awkward–

**Craig:** That’s the thing. I don’t know if you’ve seen these, as we get older I see more–

**John:** Large print books.

**Craig:** –ads targeted to me that I’m like, oh boy. And they have these contraptions where it’s like suspend the book over your face in bed. And you’re like oh boy. But it’s true. If I have a heavier book that I’m reading after about 15 or 20 minutes if I’m in bed my elbows start to ache.

**John:** Yeah.

**Craig:** Because, god, can you believe that, Megana? I mean, how old are we? Do any of your friends ever say, “Ow, my elbows ache?”

**Megana:** Wait, because you’re holding the book up?

**Craig:** See, she literally doesn’t understand. She’s trying to comprehend how that could happen. Just you wait.

**John:** Just you wait. A thing I won’t put up with anymore that I used to not have a problem with is cheap paperbacks. I find it just really hard to read cheap paperbacks at this point.

**Craig:** The print is too small. I can’t read it.

**John:** The print is too small and you can sort of read through the next line. So I’m going to read my Kindle. I’ll buy a hardcover, but if I can’t get the hardcover I’ll probably read the Kindle.

**Craig:** I mean, I must admit that if there is a Kindle version to purchase I’m purchasing it. It’s just – or an Apple iBook version. The one thing that I miss and I wish they could solve is page numbers. If they could solve that.

**John:** It’s nice to be able to refer to a page number.

**Craig:** Yeah, if they could just solve page numbers.

**John:** They get better at it.

**Craig:** That would be nice.

**John:** So, Craig, now that you’re moving to my neighborhood you will have Chevaliers as your neighborhood bookstore. It is terrific, so hopefully you’ll get back in the habit of buying some books.

**Craig:** Yes.

**John:** In print.

**Craig:** Yes. I do love a bookstore. I love to browse a bookstore. And inevitably if I browse a bookstore I’m going to buy a book. And the place that we have near you per square foot I think has more bookshelf space than any place I’ve ever been other than a library. There’s bookshelves – so many opportunities for books.

**John:** Excellent. We love it.

**Craig:** So we will purchase those.

**John:** And one of those books will be the Scriptnotes book that you won’t read.

**Craig:** Complete with ribbon.

**John:** Love it. Thanks Craig.

**Craig:** Thanks guys.

**John:** Thanks Megana.

**Craig:** Thanks Megana.

**Megana:** Bye.

Links:

* [Dungeons & Dragons Art & Arcana Book](https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/562708/dungeons-and-dragons-art-and-arcana-by-michael-witwer-kyle-newman-jon-peterson-and-sam-witwer-foreword-by-joe-manganiello-official-dungeons-and-dragons-licensed/)
* [Heartbreaker](https://www.imdb.com/title/tt1465487/) and [The Breaker Upperers](https://www.imdb.com/title/tt6728096/)
* [Noah Evslin’s pitch for Guild Awards](https://twitter.com/nevslin/status/1391143482010390529)
* [Ira Glass on Taste](https://jamesclear.com/ira-glass-failure)
* Women in Film helpline for sexual harassment and misconduct in the entertainment industry:(855)WIF-LINE (855-943-5463) or reach out [online here](https://womeninfilm.org/)
* [Hometown Takeover](https://www.hgtv.com/shows/home-town-takeover)
* [Standard Ebooks](https://standardebooks.org/ebooks)
* [Get a Scriptnotes T-shirt!](https://cottonbureau.com/people/scriptnotes-podcast)
* [Gift a Scriptnotes Subscription](https://scriptnotes.supportingcast.fm/gifts) or [treat yourself to a premium subscription!](https://scriptnotes.supportingcast.fm/)
* [John August](https://twitter.com/johnaugust) on Twitter
* [Craig Mazin](https://twitter.com/clmazin) on Twitter
* [John on Instagram](https://www.instagram.com/johnaugust/?hl=en)
* [Outro](http://johnaugust.com/2013/scriptnotes-the-outros) by Brian Ramos ([send us yours!](http://johnaugust.com/2014/outros-needed))
* Scriptnotes is produced by [Megana Rao](https://twitter.com/MeganaRao) and edited by [Matthew Chilelli](https://twitter.com/machelli).

Email us at ask@johnaugust.com

You can download the episode [here](http://traffic.libsyn.com/scriptnotes/501standard.mp3).

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