Archive for the 'Parade' Category

• e  27 Benazir Bhutto on Parade

  I’ve pretty much given up on my campaign to mock and/or eliminate Parade Magazine. It’s an embarrassing publication that no self-respecting American newspaper should include, but it’s not worth the time to regularly dissect its inanity. Particularly when it can embarrass itself so well.

  This morning’s Parade Magazine (January 6th, 2008) cover article is on Benazir [...]

• e  15 On Parade

  For a short time, I was running a bit where I would re-answer questions sent to Walter Scott’s Personality Parade®, one of the most odiously irrelevant and self-congratulatory bits of cultural fluff in the lint screen we call popular culture. While I was inspired to write it out of true anger at its existence, [...]

• e  18 The Nines at Cannes

  In case you’re wandering La Croisette, wondering where all the interlocking three-part dramas with unexpected science-fiction elements are, you might want to check out The Nines, which has three market screenings scheduled this week:

  Wednesday, May 16th at 12:00pm – Palais K (Market) Friday, May 18th at 8:00pm – Palais K (Market) [...]

• e  Comments Off Eddie Murphy on Parade

  Several readers have expressed bewilderment at this site’s weekly Parade feature, asking, “What is the point, exactly?”

  That’s a question worthy of koan-like contemplation: can utter pointlessness have a point?

  International readers in particular have no frame of reference for Parade, so let me offer the briefest of introductions. Parade comes free in the Sunday paper. [...]

• e  Comments Off Jennifer Lopez on Parade

  I was unprepared for the volume of mail I got wondering what had happened to the weekly Parade feature. Sorry. I was busy premiering a movie. But that’s really no excuse. Walter Scott manages to write a weekly column despite not actually existing.

  Today’s questions originally ran in the January 28th, 2007 [...]

• e  3 Staring into mirrors

  Your article, “Farrah Fawcett on Parade” states that the first hit in Google for the search “poitier singing porgy” gives the answer to whether or not Sidney did his own singing. But the first hit in Google is a weblog at “johnaugust.com” containing an article entitled “Farrah Fawcett on Parade” that…

  Well, at that point, the [...]

• e  Comments Off Farrah Fawcett on Parade

  Every week, I re-answer questions sent to Walter Scott’s Personality Parade®. Today’s column comes from January 7, 2007.

  I was shocked by recent photos of Farrah Fawcett. Is she near death?—Carey Roberts, Cleveland, Ohio

  Walter Scott cannot predict when or even if Farrah Fawcett will die, because he is not a doctor, and does not actually [...]

• e  Comments Off Carrie Underwood on Parade

  In a controversial new feature, I answer questions submitted to Walter Scott’s Personality Parade®. Today’s column comes from December 24, 2006.

  After PARADE’s cover story on Carrie Underwood, she won Female Vocalist of the Year and Best Breakthrough Artist at the Country Music Association awards. Has anyone ever won both before?—Allen Cook, Seattle, Wash.

  Not only [...]

• e  Comments Off Raining on my Parade

  It’s ironic that your “bitchy queen� piece features your own idiocy on parade. Doesn’t Mr. Hollywood Big Shot realize that Walter Scott is a mouthpiece for hundreds of publicists? His job is to mix the press release morsel in with a bit of trivia to make it seem like gossip, and therefore, interesting. Then [...]

• e  Comments Off Idiocy on Parade

  A new feature in which I answer questions sent to Walter Scott’s Personality Parade®. Today’s column comes from December 17, 2006.

  Any truth to rumors that Barbra Streisand will play Mama Rose in a film version of the musical Gypsy?—Mary Jansen, Orlando, Fla.

  And this will change your life exactly how, Mary? Let’s say she [...]