I’m always a little dubious about online tests, which purport to give an accurate assessment of one’s intelligence and/or sluttiness in a few simple questions. But I took this political-leaning quiz anyway, and was dismayed to find out that a detailed analysis of my opinions on issues of social and economic freedom placed me squarely on Senator Hillary Clinton’s right collarbone.
I certainly have nothing against Clinton. I guess of all the famous people portrayed in the chart, there’s no one I would say is a better fit. But I guess I somehow expected my thoughtful multiply-chosen answers would land me somewhere off the grid, in a special fifth quadrant of Deep Thinkers who are above Politics.
But no.
I’m Hillary’s clavicle.
Looking back through the questions, I can’t help but think they’d be useful when trying to get inside the heads characters whose beliefs are different than my own. For example…
(9) People shouldn’t be allowed to have children they can’t provide for.
Who would mark “Strongly Agree?” To me, that’s someone who not only believes government should intervene in personal matters, but thinks there’s a clear economic standard for determining it. No real politician would stake out this turf, but it’s an interesting worldview for a scary Texas sheriff, for example.
(15) If I’m dating someone I like to know where they are and what they’re up to at all times.
If you answer “Strongly Agree,” does that make you Republican, Democrat or Stalker?
(24) It should be legal for two consenting adults to challenge each other to a duel and fight a Death Match.
And these death matches would be held in the Thunderdome.
You can see the rest of the questions here.