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All-new MySpace beta

March 6, 2007 Follow Up, Rant, Rave

I now fully regret my earlier [ambivalence](http://johnaugust.com/archives/2006/myambivalence) about MySpace. As it turns out, the site is only lame when you have 600 or 700 friends. Having crossed the magic threshold of [1,000 MySpace pals](http://myspace.com/johnaugust), I truly understand what all the fuss is about.

The difference is [MySpace Advanced](http://collect.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=disallowed), and you can only access it when you have more than 1,000 friends. It’s beta, and I guess I clicked on some sort of non-disclosure button when I accepted. But it’s too great a secret to keep to myself.

Here are just some of the improvements you get with MySpace Advanced:

* __Full CSS styling.__ No longer do you have to hide formatting in weird text boxes.

* __AJAX-y goodness.__ You can delete rogue comments in-place, or drag-and-drop elements on the page.

* __HTML tag destroyers.__ Not only can you turn off HTML graphics in comments, you can automatically delete any comment that tries to use them.

* __Lameness filters.__ Sick of people leaving ASCII graphics as comments? Just click the checkbox and they’re history.

* __Smarter ads.__ Even though it says “gay” in your “orientation” field, the system knows you might be interested in something other than a shirtless guy for Gay.com.

* __Education screening.__ The system parses every message, comment and profile blurb a user writes, generating an estimated education level for the user. I have my threshold set to “College Grad,” which effectively silences the stupid people.You can also set a top education limit, good for shutting out snarky screenwriters.

The new version is terrific. Unfortunately, it doesn’t exist.

Even with a thousand so-called friends, the system is just as lame and frustrating as it was when it was just me and [Tom](http://myspace.com/tom).By the way, has anyone else noticed that “Tom” has formatting errors on his page, and _he’s the freakin’ spokesperson?_ Check his “Movies” section. So, this is my way of saying goodbye to MySpace in all its craptastic-ness. See ya. Wouldn’t want to be ya.

Related Posts

  1. MyAmbivalence
  2. Hey, why didn’t my comment get posted?
  3. Ingenious comment spam booster

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