[
](http://johnaugust.com/Assets/elevator.jpg) This sign in the Beverly Center parking garage is, I think, an example of [found poetry](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Found_poetry).
I find the decision to switch from subjunctive to indicative mood in the second line bold and foward-thinking; the elevator will become inoperative, in the same way that all men will grow old and feeble.
In lines three and four, I appreciate the writer’s ironic instruction to remain calm while inciting alarm in others.
“If furnished.” Those quotation marks are the author’s wink to an audience jaded by systematic disappointment. We know there will never be a telephone.
And how could one read those last two lines as anything other than a call to inaction? Yes, there are steps you could take. You could attempt to be a hero, as you’ve seen countless times in movies and on TV, but you’re certain to fail. Better to give up now, and learn helplessness.
Ding. Sigh.