I directly asked a mum this very question at my son’s preschool yesterday.

Ai is Aiano’s mum. (for future reference)

I did not remember someone I’d met briefly at a huge awards ceremony. When I met them the second time and introduced myself I got the world’s nastiest “we’ve met.” Still don’t remember them before, but NOW I know they are kinda jerky.

But that’s better than having them say, “Hey, we’ve slept together,” and having no memory of it.

I’m like Jake, and it is pretty embarrassing to be the one who remembers everyone. I get “nice to meet you” and I shoot back with, “How’s your grandmother? She was having problems with her cat Grimalkin tearing up the couch a few years ago. Did she finally listen to you and have his claws removed? Or did she buy the leather couch instead?” It’s terribly embarrassing, particularly if the grandmother is now dead, killed by the cat.

it was ingenious because 95% of the time he was right, and it had the remarkable double-effect of making that random freshman feel welcomed and special — and of making him seem like a caring person (he was) and a guy with an incredible memory (he was not).

it’s a neat trick but it doesn’t strike me as very hollywood.

But I found that the pressure of having to remember their names helped, and whenever someone introduced themselves, I would repeat their name so I could be sure I processed it: “Firstname, right? Hi, Firstname, I’m Kristan.”

That’s one of the biggest things for me, I think. Repetition.

(Just make sure you’re repeating the right name! For a long time I kept thinking my friend’s girlfriend looked more like a Wendy than her real name, and I just kept thinking that, and one day she was walking away from us in a crowd so I tried to get her attention and I yelled, “Hey, Wendy!” Needless to say, she didn’t turn around.)